Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Rape Fantasy for men


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Rape Fantasy for men Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Rape Fantasy for men - 12/19/2005 11:20:32 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		are there any forums regarding rape fantasies for men?

i am leary about pursuing this due to several factors.

1. finding someone trustworthy enough to share this experience with.

2. getting assurances that no men would ever be involved.

3. making sure that not real harm would occur (such as, permenant markings, disfigurement, things such as this)

4. that, when the scene is over that i would not be abandonned while still bound, gagged and/or blindfolded.

anyone have any suggestions to offer here?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/19/2005 11:27:12 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		I don't know of any forums for this discussion but based on the partners I've had, it is common for men and women both.

Your concerns sound very reasonable to me and the only way to assure any safety is to be be really safe and only enact such fantasies with someone you know and trust.

I did a gang rape fantasy for a partner once that involved 7+ people (most of whom he knew and all of whom I knew very well). I ran the scenario, I couldn't play a rapist myself. It was fun in a weird "why are you using that fake accent" and "the cops are pulling up along side us" sort of way.

Hopefully other men will speak up and respond to your inquery.


_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/19/2005 8:15:04 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		what is a safe way of setting such a scene up. how can i possibly protect myself from it getting out of hand and turning into the real thing?

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 7:10:08 AM   
AlderTheKitty


Posts: 174
Joined: 10/3/2005
From: Oshawa
Status: offline 		one way is to have an advocate to speak for you

the fansitsy for most is to want to have the feelings associated with it such as helplessness vulnerabiltiy and fear but with ough having to worry that you will be harmed

_____________________________

i am a strong person and will not be pushed around which makes my submission a special gift that few are going to receave

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 7:20:43 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		that sounds like a good idea, wish i knew more people here where i live.

(in reply to AlderTheKitty)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 8:35:47 AM   
LadyKim


Posts: 191
Joined: 11/11/2004
Status: offline 		micahelGA,

The key is communication, and be sure you are dealing with a dominant that knows what she is doing. You will need to spend the time getting to know her, and letting her get to know you.

You need to realize though that a rape scene can be very mentally challenging. Rape indicates non consentual, so you will process a great deal of emotions (including anger) during and after the scene. It sometimes takes days or a week for the thought of what happened to become something enjoyable.

Do not engage in a rape scene with someone you have just met or barely know. This is a huge fantasy for a lot of submissive men, but it is also rather dangerous. You need to know the person you are trusting with this is sexually safe, and that they are concerned with your well being during the process (however, not so much so that it comes across as fake or half ass).

Good luck, and realize it is going to take a great deal of time to find this person.

MzKim

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 8:56:44 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		yeah, i know there would be a lot of thought and planning in such a scene and i think that my primary concern is that, even after all the plans and safety issues are worked out and i find someone i can trust, that somehow a male would be added to the scene at the last minute and that's something i cannot cope with. i can barely stand to work with them, much less get that close to them. i have my personal reason behind this and won't bring it up at this time. thank You for Your input, Ma'am.

(in reply to LadyKim)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 9:00:47 AM   
slaveneedledick


Posts: 205
Joined: 3/11/2005
From: Atlanta GA
Status: offline 		What part of GA are you in Michael

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 1:48:39 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

what is a safe way of setting such a scene up. how can i possibly protect myself from it getting out of hand and turning into the real thing?


the using of a safe word should prevail. after all, STOP, NO, and DON'T DO THAT, don't always work as they can be used to be apart of the scene. So to make it clear that you don't want any more, think of a safe word that will catch her attention or throw her off guard.

As for a rape scene fantasy, you could try some role playing ideas.

1. Cop and you.

2. Nurse and patient.

3. Teacher and student. Or how about Nun and student for a more serious pain session rather than sexual.

4. Apply for a loan to a banker. Guess what you have to do?

5. Librarian and you. You have a book past due.

6. Male strippers have often complained of women taking things to far and being physicaly taken down. You could give it a try by pretending to be a erotic dancer for someone or a few ladies.

A narorator or Dungeon Master is always good to have around to help make sure something dosen't get taken to far according to what you and the dom have agreed to for the scene. Any how, best of luck having a fantasy happening soon to you.

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 2:42:54 PM   
MasterHyde


Posts: 127
Joined: 4/10/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

yeah, i know there would be a lot of thought and planning in such a scene and i think that my primary concern is that, even after all the plans and safety issues are worked out and i find someone i can trust, that somehow a male would be added to the scene at the last minute and that's something i cannot cope with. i can barely stand to work with them, much less get that close to them. i have my personal reason behind this and won't bring it up at this time. thank You for Your input, Ma'am.


If I'm reading this right, you don't currently have a relationship with anyone who you trust enough to do this for you. What I would suggest is to wait until you do know someone who you can really trust with this. Your concerns are very well-founded and realistic, but the idea of someone adding another male into the scene "at the last minute" is one that can only be addressed when this scene is managed by someone you can trust not to do this. This means someone who understands your problem with this and who cares enough about your well-being to make sure this doesn't happen. When I say cares about your well-being, I'm not saying she has to be in love with you or be your long-term mistress. She just needs to be someone you can trust to put your safety (both emotional and physical) first before anything else.

In my experience, this means either a committed partner, or a trusted friend. When you have someone like this in your life, then bring up your fantasy and talk to her about it can be experienced safely.



_____________________________

Master Hyde
A self-righteous, poly, dominant, possessive control freak with strong paternal tendencies and a sadistic inner child

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 3:30:11 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterHyde

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

yeah, i know there would be a lot of thought and planning in such a scene and i think that my primary concern is that, even after all the plans and safety issues are worked out and i find someone i can trust, that somehow a male would be added to the scene at the last minute and that's something i cannot cope with. i can barely stand to work with them, much less get that close to them. i have my personal reason behind this and won't bring it up at this time. thank You for Your input, Ma'am.


If I'm reading this right, you don't currently have a relationship with anyone who you trust enough to do this for you. What I would suggest is to wait until you do know someone who you can really trust with this. Your concerns are very well-founded and realistic, but the idea of someone adding another male into the scene "at the last minute" is one that can only be addressed when this scene is managed by someone you can trust not to do this. This means someone who understands your problem with this and who cares enough about your well-being to make sure this doesn't happen. When I say cares about your well-being, I'm not saying she has to be in love with you or be your long-term mistress. She just needs to be someone you can trust to put your safety (both emotional and physical) first before anything else.

In my experience, this means either a committed partner, or a trusted friend. When you have someone like this in your life, then bring up your fantasy and talk to her about it can be experienced safely.




If he's saying things like "I wish more people knew where I lived" then I think the kind of rape he's describing involves a total stranger -- hence all the warning/precautions about not getting a man involved.

To the OP I would suggest that this is really only a fantasy, and wouldn't make a realistic reality. If there were women who were into the idea of raping men who were total strangers, the line up of volunteers would be hundreds long. Women generally look for some type of connection - physical, emotional, or even simply affection -- before they desire executing an act like that.

You might want to consider having this fantasy roleplayed with a partner that you trust. I've done lots of "kidnappings" and types of scenarios you describe but my partner always knew it was me, even when we were sneaky about it. The other option is to entrust your partner to choose one of her friends to rape you -- that way, there is some sense of the unknown and unfamiliarity. I've considered doing this with my partner and might at some point, but right now I'm simply too possessive of him. I know I have a willing girlfriend or two.

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to MasterHyde)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/20/2005 4:08:12 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		i am merely wishing to learn more about this at this point and not wanting it to occur "tomorrow" or anything. i will probably shove this issue to the back burner for 6 months to a year, provided i actually get to know someone on that level.

(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/21/2005 6:21:47 PM   
fldrkhorse


Posts: 158
Joined: 11/5/2005
From: North Carolina
Status: offline 		Truly, I've never really understood this. There are so many men with the rape fantasy, yet it always ends with, but I don't want to etc. You really don't get choices with rape. Ask anyone who has been raped if they had a DOM looking out for them or a safe word. I told a guy once, "you really want to get raped, head to such and such part of town." He quickly told me, "but I don't want to get hurt." You think rape is suppose to feel good? IMO rape is not something to play with under any circumstances. Nothing good can every come from it. Physically, emotionally, or psychologically. Leave it a fantasy.

_____________________________

I'm not where I need to be, but I'm better than I was yesterday.

Namaste, I honor the divine in you

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/21/2005 7:21:36 PM   
Sensualips


Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

IMO rape is not something to play with under any circumstances. Nothing good can every come from it. Physically, emotionally, or psychologically. Leave it a fantasy.


My opinion differs.

I have had rape and forced fantasies since I hit puberty and for some time this disturbed me. After all, I had friends that had been the victims of real rape. I even worked a rape and battered women crises line in college. So my attraction to rape scenarios were a shameful secret for a long time. I eventually realized it is fantasy after all, and not the same as reality. The fact that I was a little disturbed by it sort of reassured me that I was pretty normal. Gradually I embraced resistance play or coercion play as just something I liked.

It is a common fantasy, for men and women - topping and bottoming. There are all kinds of reasons people are attracted to it. (I know John Warren has a section of his book devoted to fantasy rape and could probably address this.) Some people may have had a bad experience in the past, and acting it out through a similar situation where they have control is very liberating. For me, it is just part of the whole forced-and-overpowered primal thing. I love the idea of the back and forth struggle. It is an ideal scenario to incorporate other delicious things like bondage or hands-around-the-throat or dirty talk or general roughness. You can incorporate authority roles like teachers or police officers or ministers or age play. You can add in hypnosis or reduced consciousness. Mmmmm. It is dirty and shameful and oh so yummy.

I have only played at play rape myself. (I call it a starter-rape.) I am still waiting for the opportunity to fully experience this as I am terribly choosy about who I might engage in this type of play with. I do think it is something to discuss and talk about a lot in advance. As much "good" can come from play rape as whipping or needle play or a whole bunch of other things.


(in reply to fldrkhorse)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/21/2005 7:34:17 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		i can't go with the needle play or anything like that that would leave marks or cause long term harm to me.

(in reply to Sensualips)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/21/2005 7:40:44 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

yeah, i know there would be a lot of thought and planning in such a scene and i think that my primary concern is that, even after all the plans and safety issues are worked out and i find someone i can trust, that somehow a male would be added to the scene at the last minute and that's something i cannot cope with. i can barely stand to work with them, much less get that close to them. i have my personal reason behind this and won't bring it up at this time. thank You for Your input, Ma'am.


Here's a thought.

Once you are in a relationship, do a "rape scene" that is strictly verbal with you blindfolded.

No other people, no sexual contact, only words. See how you react that.

It reads above like you have some intense issues and I strongly recommend going very very slowly. Start written or verbal scenes first. Then try a one-on-one situation.


_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/21/2005 7:43:27 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fldrkhorse

Truly, I've never really understood this. There are so many men with the rape fantasy, yet it always ends with, but I don't want to etc. You really don't get choices with rape. Ask anyone who has been raped if they had a DOM looking out for them or a safe word. I told a guy once, "you really want to get raped, head to such and such part of town." He quickly told me, "but I don't want to get hurt." You think rape is suppose to feel good? IMO rape is not something to play with under any circumstances. Nothing good can every come from it. Physically, emotionally, or psychologically. Leave it a fantasy.


Thus the BIG DIFFERENCE between the fantasy and reality.

I don't think this is a gender issue either.



_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to fldrkhorse)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 12/21/2005 7:50:15 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		i live in Columbus, GA...near Ft. Benning

(in reply to slaveneedledick)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 1/13/2006 4:20:17 PM   
Kevin22minn


Posts: 2
Joined: 1/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

similar situation where they have control is very liberating


Right on Sensualips. I too have had the fantasy run thru my head since I can remember. Maybe I am too trusting or perhaps a little too horny, but I let myself get raped in my relationships. When I feel I can trust the man I just tell him..look, if you have rape fantasies and you want to rape me, i am ok with it. i can't tell you how liberating it feels for both of us.
kevin

(in reply to Sensualips)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Rape Fantasy for men - 1/13/2006 4:26:24 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		that may be your fantasy, but i don't want any guy involved at all...period...next?

_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to Kevin22minn)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Rape Fantasy for men Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078