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RE: NewDom - 11/20/2008 1:53:17 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Well, I guess you took the advice and lost the mask. That's good. It means that when people tell you things for your own benefit, you'll listen.

Now, take the same advice about mingling with the "old" folks. I'd be willing to bet they've got a lot to teach you that you're probably not going to learn on line. Chances are, those older folks, most of the time, are going to have some skills that they've had in practice longer than you've been on the net.

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Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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(in reply to SimplyMichael)

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Post #: 21

RE: NewDom - 11/20/2008 2:09:18 PM

MasterTslave

Posts: 200
Joined: 8/24/2005
Status: offline

Try dating someone and start with light bondage and build on your skills? Get the people skills a little better and you should be fine...as far as older people, they rock..older men are more patient and older women are in their prime!

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

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Post #: 22

RE: NewDom - 11/21/2008 9:24:27 PM

Sadisticlust

Posts: 2
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

When I was 20 years old an older lady, that I saw on occasion, put me in touch with an older Dom.This 55 year old man taught me how to be a Master a Dom. Please understand that just having a Dominate personality doesn't make you a Dom it usually makes you just a ass! You have to learn how to use Dominance for the pleasure of others as well as your self.

Of course if you desire to be self taught well good luck to you!

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

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Post #: 23

RE: NewDom - 11/22/2008 10:26:33 AM

badlilthang

Posts: 357
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: tweedydaddy

Go away and come back when you are old enough to mix comfortably with grown ups.

**interesting...how can he "go away" - learn all on his own - and come back being he is comfortable mixing with grown groups? Comments like this is what makes new people walk away..and not return...was this the way people accepted You in the beginning??**

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(in reply to tweedydaddy)

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Post #: 24

RE: NewDom - 11/22/2008 10:29:41 AM

mystickoolaid

Posts: 519
Joined: 11/15/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RainydayNE

there are pretty much going to be people twice as old as you anywhere you go because the world didn't come into existence on your birthday. i wouldn't discount older members of a community because they probably have some useful things to tell you. not only that, but i firmly believe age is just a track of chronology and has no bearing on how fun someone is. you might be missing out on the gnarliest person in the world, friend or otherwise, just because you're being picky about the age of people in the community.
if this were the other way around, if someone were whining about all the "kids" showing up at events, you'd be having a fit, wouldn't you? =p
MissIsis' solution is pretty good, if you know younger people who are interested, you could all go together. the local group here has a branch for the "younger set" -- maybe there's something like that where you live?

(in reply to RainydayNE)

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Post #: 25

RE: NewDom - 11/25/2008 10:00:59 AM

DaddyChess

Posts: 193
Joined: 4/11/2008
Status: offline

To my line of thinking, so what if they are older. As to feeling comfortable around people, not everyone is a "people person" but having basic social skills will go a long way to advancing your knowledge and more importantly, your experience. Although there are people who would rather you just "go away", sometimes you need to step up and step out of your comfort zone to grow. There are others and sites who love to help. Leathernroses has been a most helpful site with many articles from both doms and subs. (And it's free!)

On top of that, I recommend continuing to read the message boards here and when you find someone who seems to have similar lins of thinking, contact them. Of course this is still online, but relationships can grow from there.

Lastly, read. Specifically I recommend "the 5 love languages", "how to win friends and influence people", and "Men are from Mars, women are from venus." Though these books don't speak specifically to us in the lifestyle, the principals still hold true.

Remember, there is nothing wrong with having a mentor. Ask questions and share your opinions.

Till next time....

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

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Post #: 26