Daes
Posts: 246
Joined: 4/20/2007 From: Diamond Bar, SoCal Status: offline
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I wanted to get thoughts and opinions. We all have those few bad apples of the community, abusive men who think women are supposed to serve men, but not all too often do we hear about women abusing men, and specifically in this topic I wanted to discuss dominant women that abuse submissive men. I was approached several months ago by a male sub. The deeper we got into our conversation, the more it became clear that not only was he unhappy in his relationship but that he was absolutely terrified of his mistress and believed that he could not leave her or she would act upon threats that she had made against him. She tortures him, sometimes to the point of drawing blood. This was a woman that would hold gardening shears to his balls and tell him that she was going to cut them off if he said a word. Now I am still skeptical that someone would Actually cut them off, however, he was utterly convinced that it was a real possibility. The amount of psychological trauma here is enough to damage his overall opinions of women in general, he's afraid of most women and worried that they will take advantage of him. Not only was this woman in the same building that he worked in, she also had keys to his house. I advised him to change the locks, find a new job, and get a restraining order. He was very reluctant, he didn't believe the police would help him, much less believe him, and he was afraid that the consequences would be Worse if he did anything at all. He wanted to wait until she released him in a year's time. I havent heard from him since. So I can only hope that he is doing better. The mistress in question has a profile here on collarme, and quite frankly when I take in his experiences with her in context with her profile, she comes off like a man-hating psycho. I tried looking online to see if there was someway I could help him. After doing some research I realized that men in these kinds of situations don't have too many resources or people to turn to, I read all kinds of horror stories: men who were abused by their wives (with marble rolling pics, pans, baseball bats) and they themselves arrested when they called the police on their wives, husbands losing custody of children to abusive women, lawyers laughing or just staring at their client's stories and advising not to sue or the case could be turned against them... And only two months ago did California rule that it was illegal for shelters to deny services to abused men. It made me wonder how many other guys were like the one that spoke to me, feeling trapped in a relationship, unable to leave their Domme out of fear. As a woman, it is easy. You say a man hit you, the cops will come immediately and he will be arrested. But as a man, (at least from the research I have done) I have a hard time believing he would get the same assistance. Anyone else have any experiences dealing with a similar situation? Do you leave it as is even if it could mean Serious harm to the sub? Are there any resources out there I might have missed that could help someone else in this situation?
< Message edited by Daes -- 11/27/2008 3:11:46 PM >
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~*Estrellita*~ I want to be in surrender of His strength, of His power. Alone, I am nothing, but in His arms I am all things... ~His puppy~
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