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RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/29/2008 12:53:00 PM   
blondagebabe


Posts: 18
Joined: 11/28/2008
Status: offline 		That's not a lie, it's an error of judgement. You are human after all, we make mistakes, especially when our hearts become involved.

Best of luck!

(in reply to NormalOutside)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/29/2008 1:23:23 PM   
moonvine


Posts: 780
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		Yay, ice cream...thanks!:)

(in reply to WinsomeDefiance)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/29/2008 10:16:28 PM   
stormgirl


Posts: 294
Joined: 1/17/2007
From: tennessee
Status: offline 		You meant what you said, and you were mistaken.  We all do this many times a week, but usually it doesn't matter if we are mistaken.

I hope you get through this with the help of - mint chip? - and your friends.


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If you start your day with a fresh cup of crazy and some arrogance on the side, good job!
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(in reply to moonvine)
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RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/29/2008 11:10:24 PM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		storm you beat me to it, that is the word mistaken and it is not a lie.

Don't sweat it.

T

(in reply to stormgirl)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/29/2008 11:23:28 PM   
moonvine


Posts: 780
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		But did I mean it?  Was I lying to myself?

(in reply to stormgirl)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/29/2008 11:29:38 PM   
BKSir


Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: moonvine

But did I mean it?  Was I lying to myself?


Only you can answer that part.  This brings a bit of a comparison to mind.  If I were to say, right at this second, "The sun is shining rather nicely.", it would be a lie.  If I were to have said that 12 hours ago, it would have been true.  However, things change, and, the gods honest truth then, may not precisely apply now.  Does it make it any less truthful in the context in which it was given originally?  Of course not, but that context changed, the situation changed.  What I said WAS true, it was not a lie by any means.  But now, things are different, and it's a rather chilly evening/night out there.


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(in reply to moonvine)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/30/2008 3:45:24 AM   
bondagelover1950


Posts: 122
Joined: 8/10/2008
Status: offline 		Something is a lie ONLY when you know that what you are saying is not true. If you say it, believing it true, and it later turns out to be not so AND you own up to the mistake then it is a whoops, uh-oh, duh, etc.

BTW to my knowledge there are only two ways to lie and be totaly believeable.



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RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/30/2008 4:21:15 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: moonvine

But did I mean it?  Was I lying to myself?


At the time you probably did mean it.  Then things change, and you don't necessarily have control over your feelings so much any more.  It's easy to say walk away if you're getting too involved.  It's much harder to do it.  I know that - been there, seen it, done it, got the t-shirt(s). 

And if there's ice-cream and hugs going round - count me in!  I'll bring some chocolate flakes to add to the dish - chocolate is the cure for everything, even a broken heart...

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There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to moonvine)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/30/2008 8:43:38 AM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		or maybe you wanted to play so bad that you lied to yourself!!!     We do do that you know.   and if thats the case, the person you hurt the most is ............ (drumroll)..... yourself!

so quit beating yourself up, do a self examination to see if you did lie to yourself, make a note of the symptoms if you did, and vow not to do it again.

Life is too short not to be honest with yourself.

(in reply to myotherself)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/30/2008 9:29:22 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Not a lie. You were making a guess about events in the future. There was no way for you to predict what did happen.

Once feelings change, and they do, you need first to be honest with yourself and then with your partner. And accept the fact that they aren't obligated to return your feelings and may instead feel the need to run like hell.

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Slave to laundry

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(in reply to NormalOutside)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Is something a lie if... - 11/30/2008 7:46:26 PM   
stormgirl


Posts: 294
Joined: 1/17/2007
From: tennessee
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: moonvine
But did I mean it?  Was I lying to myself?
Oh FFS!  You are a Person, with a Person's ability to run you mind over this thought again and again trying to figure out what you did . . . .  Not one of the helpful abilities we humans have.  You cannot know what zactly was in your mind.  Leave the attempt to ensure that you are to blame.  This is true: even if it is entirely your fault you still do not deserve damage.   It is what it is - move forward with love.

(Maybe you now know more about yourself.  I found being emotionally uninvolved with lovers easy (overly easy) when I was younger.  Now where my naughty bits go, my heart goes also.  Of course I only found this out when I became more emotionally involved with someone than I intended.)

edited for typos


< Message edited by stormgirl -- 11/30/2008 7:47:44 PM >

_____________________________

pride and elan

If you start your day with a fresh cup of crazy and some arrogance on the side, good job!
indecent yet sorta cool


(in reply to moonvine)
Profile   Post #: 31
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