RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back.

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RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/29/2008 10:02:47 PM

Aszhrae

Posts: 1030
Joined: 3/31/2008
Status: offline

Mistress and master left the community years ago when relocated from Toronto. Their family friend of 16 years died and there were too many memories attached to continued attention to the community. Their only exception to not leaving the lifestyle altogether is me, but they will have nothing to do with the community here in Vancouver.
I have to respect their wishes and I doubt they will ever go back.
Because they have distanced themselves from the community, I have only ventured into the local community a few times in the last 18 years. My involvement here within the lifestyle is a return to it after being out of it for a long while. Most of what I know is outdated but still useful, but its been one hell of a learning curve since my return. Even mistress has no idea what I ask her about from time to time.
Just means a whole lot of reading, conversations, stepping on a few toes and breaking a few eggshells but I am a quick study and relearning some things I have forgotten, mostly protocol and such but learning new things as well.
Most of what I knew was closet stuff back in the 80s. A lot has changed in almost 2 decades.

(in reply to SummerWind)

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Post #: 41

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/29/2008 10:15:51 PM

chiaThePet

Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

I left to go to the fridge for a hoagie and a brewski.

I'm back, did I miss anything?

chia* (the pet)

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to VMistressV)

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Post #: 42

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/29/2008 10:16:30 PM

devotedinSD

Posts: 91
Joined: 11/30/2008
Status: offline

I tried because it would have been easier without. But I can't.

(in reply to VMistressV)

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Post #: 43

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/30/2008 1:49:24 AM

steviemichael

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/6/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: moonvine

, I suppose I could stop acting on them.

maybe you have answered your own question "what does it mean to be in the lifestyle"

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switch/submissive male walking in the path of and learning of my true desires and enjoying what i am discovering

(in reply to moonvine)

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Post #: 44

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/30/2008 2:23:56 AM

steviemichael

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/6/2007
Status: offline

Leaving the Lifestyle is a matter of choice!

_____________________________

switch/submissive male walking in the path of and learning of my true desires and enjoying what i am discovering

(in reply to LadyPact)

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Post #: 45

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/30/2008 2:33:29 AM

steviemichael

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/6/2007
Status: offline

why do people choose clothers maybe for many reasons they are making a fashion statement or they feel comfortable liken to a person(s) choice to be in the lifestyle or not to be in the lifestyle.
this may or may not shock some but actually being in the lifestyle is kind of trendy!

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switch/submissive male walking in the path of and learning of my true desires and enjoying what i am discovering

(in reply to SummerWind)

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Post #: 46

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/30/2008 5:25:35 AM

JustDarkness

Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline

I never leave the "lifestyle"...it is part of me.
Just get bored of the website sometimes...and sometimes it is good to leave a while to get a fresh look at things..
The website is not the core of the lifestyle..it is just damn handy and good to have it.

(in reply to steviemichael)

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Post #: 47

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/30/2008 5:46:01 AM

ALAstella

Posts: 253
Joined: 12/3/2008
Status: offline

Please forgive me for straying from the flock, but I am an individual.

(in reply to Aszhrae)

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Post #: 48

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/30/2008 7:24:23 AM

GravityPro

Posts: 10
Joined: 11/10/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: moonvine

quote:

For me it would mean not even having the desires anymore.

When you figure out how to not have the desires anymore, please cmail me right away. I've turned down an awful lot of men who would otherwise be great partners because they couldn't consider hitting a woman.

Well, I don't know anything about that, but there are some Buddhists over here who wouldn't mind having a word with you.

(in reply to moonvine)

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Post #: 49

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/30/2008 7:36:05 AM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

Leaving my lifestyle, the Victorian Lifestyle, is not an option simply because so much of it has been part of me and how I live life. I can however walk away from two things because they are not core elements but add-ons or perks if you like:

Slave ownership/relationships.
BDSM.

Both have I done in the past for a temporary period due to family and home commitments or because I was disheartened about the real probability that whilst I remain here in Queensland and possibly in Australia, would never again collar another slave. (Mostly due to the focus on youth and the tendency to ignore the older person as well as me being married). I returned to activity mostly because it looks more likely that we will collar a boy who will in due course become a personal collar for my wife. Beside which i am having fun and pleasure in learning new things..

< Message edited by IronBear -- 12/30/2008 7:37:13 AM >

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to GravityPro)

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Post #: 50

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 12/31/2008 10:02:28 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

I never left, per say, I just stopped openly searching, and I focused on me and having fun and what I wanted.

Eventually with out all the pressure to hunt and find someone,, Someone would wander my way and we'd click.

quote:

ORIGINAL: VMistressV

I have seen that a bunch of people on CM have left the "lifestyle" at one point or another. And I thought that it would provide support people having troubles with this lifestyle to know that other people have experienced similar trials.

So I guess I am wondering why you left, and what brought you back?

(in reply to VMistressV)

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Post #: 51

RE: Leaving the lifestyle and coming back. - 1/3/2009 2:51:08 PM

AtlantisKing111

Posts: 181
Joined: 1/14/2005
Status: offline

The reason I left the lifestyle at one point was that a couple of individuals who I'd trusted VERY deeply turned out to be abusers and backstabbers who did not have my best interests at heart.

What brought me back? A deep seated need to include rope, gags, cuffs and collars into my sex life coupled with an intense desire to have the person I'm with kiss my feet and do other humbling actions.

(in reply to VMistressV)

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Post #: 52