Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Differences between male and female subs?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Differences between male and female subs? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 12/26/2008 9:53:37 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		LOL Well I'm not a submissive, but I am  a female, and I am not obsessed about looks as long as he's decent to look at, and I'm not obsessed with money, but they do have to have enough to put gas in the car and clothing on their body and every now and then groceries.
quote:

ORIGINAL: roland23

Great question! Are male subs as obsessed about looks and money as many of the female subs on this website are?

(in reply to roland23)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 12/27/2008 12:11:29 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: boytoyinatlanta

males subs are trained to be submissive....female subs are born that way


Explain.

_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


(in reply to boytoyinatlanta)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 12/27/2008 2:00:13 PM   
bound4more


Posts: 128
Joined: 10/3/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Well I am not a master but I have had a lot of contact with male subs.  I do see a difference between the the sexes and the way they go about getting their needs met.  Most of the male subs I know are almost.. demanding.  It is as if the societal push toward men being leaders, has cast the shadow down on them and it's nearly unavoidable to walk away from that.
Male subs in my observation have defined needs.  "I want to service you", but in the way that has replayed in their heads for years.  Females on the other hand veer closer to the "whatever he wants" side of the spectrum.  In a strange way, both of these mirror the other.. they are the same, but different.  It is hard to explain.
As far as training goes I find it easier to break the illusions of either sex.
Kyst


Hmmm - interesting. That hasn't been my experience. There are many many female subs that are quite demanding. i think the main difference is females attempt to manipulate more in order to get their own way. Males tend to be more direct about it. But that's what i've observed. i don't see either way as better or worse. But what i don't see is that males are, on average, more demanding.

_____________________________

You can tell who someone really is by how they act

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 12/27/2008 2:45:25 PM   
JustDarkness


Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline 		at OP
just their sex..nothing else. Humans are way to complex to just divide them in females and males.

(in reply to bound4more)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 12/28/2008 8:10:57 AM   
leakylee


Posts: 747
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: roland23

Great question! Are male subs as obsessed about looks and money as many of the female subs on this website are?


is there some 'get a clue' issue going on that i wasnt aware of? why for, how come, yall didnt share?

smooches
lee

_____________________________

I am so not right, that I left..

(in reply to roland23)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 12/28/2008 8:25:20 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: boytoyinatlanta

males subs are trained to be submissive....female subs are born that way


This aught to be interesting!

~sits back and waits~


_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to boytoyinatlanta)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 12/29/2008 9:00:45 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline

On preference I would have to say that I prefer a fem sub to a male sub and so this topic/question has had me asking myself why that is?

Generally fem subs tend to be more picky. They always do the housework better ( the ones I have do anyway) and they tend to be more vulnerable when naked!

< Message edited by allthatjaz -- 12/29/2008 9:01:04 AM >

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 1/2/2009 2:00:22 PM   
masterdstar


Posts: 160
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		For Me simple; I'd be MUCH more harsh on a male slave being a retro-sexual Dominant Male :- )))
Ah, let the PC begin...

Happy New Year

(in reply to NefertariReborn)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 1/3/2009 10:43:25 AM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: boytoyinatlanta

males subs are trained to be submissive....female subs are born that way

And intersex subs? Transgendered subs?

Can I just inject enough estrogen into my system to be 're-born' into submissiveness?

_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to boytoyinatlanta)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 1/3/2009 10:55:05 AM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: boytoyinatlanta

males subs are trained to be submissive....female subs are born that way


I was going to ask if you were trying to say I was not normal... but it is you again...

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to boytoyinatlanta)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 3/29/2009 6:30:05 PM   
asianchloe


Posts: 104
Joined: 2/25/2009
Status: offline 		Are male doms trained to be that way while female dommes are born that way?


quote:

ORIGINAL: boytoyinatlanta

males subs are trained to be submissive....female subs are born that way


(in reply to boytoyinatlanta)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 3/29/2009 6:38:50 PM   
VampiresLair


Posts: 1307
Joined: 9/3/2008
Status: offline 		Funny, most of the male subs I have had have been born that way, though the females have needed lots and lots of training. If female subs are born that way, does that mean we Dommes are trained out of our submissive birth and made to be dominant?

The only major difference for me between training a male and a female is the femenization.

DV


_____________________________

Separately we are DiurnalVampire and DVsFox

10/18 Wedding date. 1 year and still blissfully happy

10/13/10 3 year anniversary of his becoming my Fox

Talk impolitely to me, baby - Thanks sunshinemiss



(in reply to asianchloe)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 3/30/2009 2:19:19 AM   
crazyredhead1957


Posts: 189
Joined: 12/10/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: roland23

Great question! Are male subs as obsessed about looks and money as many of the female subs on this website are?


Hmmm.  i'm not obsessed, and last time i checked i had an inny.

(in reply to roland23)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 4/1/2009 12:10:22 AM   
atypicalsub


Posts: 284
Joined: 4/11/2008
From: an atypical sub
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirguym

some men would fit the 'typical woman' profile and some women the 'typical male' one.



Just ask my Mistress.  Even before my training began she saw most of my reactions were more of the female versions than what would generaly be expected of a man.  I am certain if anyone had tried to train me as a typical male it would have been extremely frustrating for both of us and the end results very disappointing at best.


_____________________________

Polyamorous, solitary eclectic pagan, pansexual slut, and personal pet of MistressYes

"Do not do anything you are ashamed of, and don't be ashamed of anything you do"
(although I'm sure my bio-family wishes I did less and was ashamed of more)


(in reply to sirguym)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 4/1/2009 1:44:18 AM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline
quote:

they would need different approaches


I am with the inny's and the outy's folks. The other thing is just too much of a headache, and I am just so afraid that when we're done with this you'll start on immigration status..

(in reply to MRandme)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 5/21/2009 10:16:17 PM   
JuliaGreenleaf


Posts: 66
Joined: 4/15/2009
Status: offline 		Coherent observations:
Age 3-5: innocent. ran around in pretty dress picking dandelions on grass. insanely smart. lectured babysitter on astrophysics. sometimes mistaken for girl by teachers.
Age 11 - realized was deeply submissive - however, inability to actually do anything about. Grew up as geek and pretty passive. Faked knowing karate or something to avoid getting beaten up. Sang soprano, ect.
Age 21 - realized was female. Took estrogen. transitioned. lived with boyfriend and loved deeply. grew nice little breasts. transition kind of hell - life disruption. Electrolysis expensive. Looked better with makeup than without. Loved, and was loved . Was not actively submissive - was happy to be loved as a woman. Cleaned. Kept house. was generally a nice person, though wish i'd done more in this time looking back. much pain due to body not being right. Electrolysis slowly happened due to very loving boyfriend
Age 28-31 - realized was submissive - did a lot of research. Old relationship gone - surgery took too long, and simply pain from years of things being not right. Now living on my own independantly, with strength from the One who healed me. Obtaining laser hair removal made me realize that yes, i was a pretty girl after all. Looking back, i realized he served as my Dominant in a time when my soul nearly died from being shattered, from being born trans. Got a job, began cleaning up my life - went to school to find something intelligent to do with my life. At times , existed as a feminist, due to training in trans / feminist liberation theory. Strength is something i still find to be a priority when surrender is inappropriate. However, deep down, realized i was deeply submissive - began to question many of baseline assertations of feminism as false, or highly inaccurate.
Age 31-33 actively searching for Dominant/Master. Much chaos, due to trans status. Worked towards getting surgery.
Apparently : estrogen = female sense of the universe and breasts. removal of testosterone = cessation of feeling of being 'poisoned' by horrible, alien chemical.
active knowledge of submissiveness = ability to generate the state 'subspace' and enhanced pain tolerance. chocolate = works with estrogen - good temporary substitute to not being in service/in subspace.
being female <> submissiveness but = gentleness and kindness of spirit. lots of my trans female friends very kind and gentle but not submissive
submissive = ability to bond to Dominant - hear their voice and ovveriding commands as life purpose. Also pain tolerance, desire to serve ect. Separate from being female but combines well with traditional notions. Convinced myself that honorable men = wonderful/amazing, and dishonorable / inept ones = sub nitemare, ignore/avoid/warn other women about/protect other women from.
I still want to hold the baby :)

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 5/21/2009 11:10:28 PM   
Comrade


Posts: 11
Joined: 5/1/2009
Status: offline 		When I approach my sub or slave, I treat them as genderless, until they have earned a label.  Generally, there may be slight differences in the way they react to situations and actions, but from what I have seen, the treatment remains relatively the same between the genders. 

As for boytoyinatlanta, I know many male subs that were born male subs.  I also know many female Doms who were born Doms.  Naivety and ignorance do not belong in such an open minded community.  Please think first in the future.

(in reply to NefertariReborn)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 5/22/2009 6:23:10 AM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		As a Domme I have had both male and female subs.  While I have treated each person as an individual I did notice different mindsets and reactions that tended to be gender based.  This wasn't a scientific study, just my own observation among the people that I dealt with.

Most of the subs that came to me felt they were "born" for that role, whether male or female.  The men seemed more interested in humiliation than the women.  What surprised me was that the men were often more intense in wanting to abandon themselves to someone else's control.  I think that part of this is due to the fact that they seem to have a harder time finding a partner that they really click with.  Men were more likely to want to elevate me to the status of a goddess (something I never asked for nor wanted).  Women were more likely to want to serve but also be a friend.  Many of the men wanted to provide gifts even though I never asked for them.  And yes, some men are VERY concerned about their looks, especially if they want some crossdressing play thrown in.  Most men into crossdressing are MUCH more concerned with their looks than the average woman. 

I found that women are more likely to ask for help in a variety of areas while men tend to be more focused on one or two.  The main area of concentration for a man seems to be directly between his legs.  (Just a generalization, not always true, so don't flame me for what I've noticed.) 

I've found that most people who say there is no difference between male and female subs have had only one or the other and so simply assume that they are the same.  There is a wide spectrum, but there are definitely some general differences.  Viva la difference!


_____________________________



(in reply to Comrade)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 5/22/2009 7:59:31 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MRandme
i had thought that since men and women think and process differently that they would need different approaches. Perhaps i am wrong.

Well, lets start right out with the fact that nobody on these boards even really acknowledges that the phrase "train a sub" means anything. But ignoring that, here's my completely unscientific, absolutely personal, likely to be at least partially wrong view on that so far...

In my experience so far, the group that I can least identify with, by far, is the F/m couples. I get the goreans. I get the bedroom tops and bottoms. I get the pain sluts and the sadists. I get the taken-in-hand crowd. But pretty much every time I go read over on the Ask A Mistress forums I find myself reeling in shock. I don't even bother to go there anymore. I see it as so totally foreign to me that no good can come of me being there. So yeah, based on that internal reaction, I'd say they are different -- at least to me.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to MRandme)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Differences between male and female subs? - 5/22/2009 8:04:48 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		JUlia..welcome to the boards.. and great post...




_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to leadership527)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Differences between male and female subs? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078