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RE: Threatening or encouraging? - 12/24/2008 10:58:59 AM

devotedinSD

Posts: 91
Joined: 11/30/2008
Status: offline

It's abusive, nothing else.

(in reply to DeviantDestiny25)

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Post #: 61

RE: Threatening or encouraging? - 12/24/2008 5:15:10 PM

NefertariReborn

Posts: 381
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant

I think the OP is asking how can you inspire a sub to be better other than manipulation

I'm not certain what the OP is asking. She offered two statements, which could be considered a tool to achieve something. Unfortunately, she did not state WHAT they were intended to achieve.

The first statement, threatening dismissal, is fine. But not for a minor issue. It should be used to let your slave know that he/she has done something which is a major issue and will result in dismissal unless it is dealt with completely. After that, it is your joint responsibility to work out a plan to address his/her behavior. If the plan does not work, he or she gets dismissed quickly.

The second statement, stating that they will never again serve, does nothing to help you and hurts them. I can't think of any situation in which it could be useful.

Ummmm She sort of asked the question defiant is talking about ooooooooh somewhere on page 2. Helps to read the whole thread or at least skim it. :) Even though it's asynchronous chat, the OP usually comes back to comment on it and add something somewhere along the line. Dialogue....gotta love it.

_____________________________

“Security is mostly a superstition…Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or it is nothing at all.” -Helen Keller

“How will you become a clear mirror if you resent being polished

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Post #: 62

RE: Threatening or encouraging? - 12/26/2008 12:37:06 PM

nalla06

Posts: 6
Joined: 9/6/2008
Status: offline

i have to agree with everyone here, to do this is abuse. Not just in our world either.i was once married to such a person and it took along time for me to come back, and believe i was worth something. Thank God i found Sir, he shows me gently how i have done something wrong, and then the way He wants it. If by chance He didn't exdplain a request fully( they never do)He will amit this mistake is His and explain better. Hisw job is to make me His perfect slave and to love and protect me, not make me feel like a piece of you know what(unless it's play?) i agree get some books and learn more, go to some4 classes if possible, since you did ask the question, the thought must be there somewhere in your head.

(in reply to natasha66)

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Post #: 63

RE: Threatening or encouraging? - 12/27/2008 3:18:47 AM

GoddessTeaze

Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: nalla06

i have to agree with everyone here, to do this is abuse. Not just in our world either.i was once married to such a person and it took along time for me to come back, and believe i was worth something. Thank God i found Sir, he shows me gently how i have done something wrong, and then the way He wants it. If by chance He didn't exdplain a request fully( they never do)He will amit this mistake is His and explain better. Hisw job is to make me His perfect slave and to love and protect me, not make me feel like a piece of you know what(unless it's play?) i agree get some books and learn more, go to some4 classes if possible, since you did ask the question, the thought must be there somewhere in your head.

It sounds as if you found your match
made in Heaven
Good on you girl.

I wish Yyou both enough.

warm Greetingz

GoddezzT`

_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

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Post #: 64

RE: Threatening or encouraging? - 12/27/2008 1:45:22 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NefertariReborn

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant

I think the OP is asking how can you inspire a sub to be better other than manipulation

I'm not certain what the OP is asking. She offered two statements, which could be considered a tool to achieve something. Unfortunately, she did not state WHAT they were intended to achieve.

The first statement, threatening dismissal, is fine. But not for a minor issue. It should be used to let your slave know that he/she has done something which is a major issue and will result in dismissal unless it is dealt with completely. After that, it is your joint responsibility to work out a plan to address his/her behavior. If the plan does not work, he or she gets dismissed quickly.

The second statement, stating that they will never again serve, does nothing to help you and hurts them. I can't think of any situation in which it could be useful.

Ummmm She sort of asked the question defiant is talking about ooooooooh somewhere on page 2. Helps to read the whole thread or at least skim it. :) Even though it's asynchronous chat, the OP usually comes back to comment on it and add something somewhere along the line. Dialogue....gotta love it.

I have no idea why you think I did not read OP's posts. After I read your reply, I went back and reread them.

To reiterate, OP did NOT state what the statements were intended to achieve. Was this a rebuke for a mild offense. or a reaction to a major issue?

I actually think it's somewhat ironic that you evidently missed the point of my post and then accused me of not reading carefully. Perhaps we should see which of us could outsnark the other.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to NefertariReborn)

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Post #: 65

RE: Threatening or encouraging? - 12/27/2008 3:19:39 PM

servantheart

Posts: 960
Joined: 10/26/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: swan70

i HAD a Master that did that to me......HAD is the important word. it was discouraging. it made me feel like a failure--and why try when i fail??? i got to a point where i felt like i was ONLY failing--never succeeding.

I had one of those too. Nobody is worth tolerating that.

TEACH--teach YOUR sub to succeed for You. And--using praise when they have earned it goes a long way to getting more of that behavior.

Building up rather than tearing down is always a better option.

_____________________________

When you really trust someone, you have to be okay with not understanding some things.
~Real Live Preacher, Real Live Preacher weblog, 07-08-04; Anonymous author of RealLivePreacher.com

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Post #: 66

RE: Threatening or encouraging? - 12/28/2008 1:51:11 AM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline

Thats cruel and should not be done

(in reply to natasha66)

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Post #: 67