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Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 8:47:44 AM

talmar

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Dommes how important ar a subs looks to you? Subs how important are a Dommes looks to you?

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 10:45:37 AM

MysticalPhoenix

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I've never tried to measure how important, but the way my sub looks is important to me.

I don't care what anyone else thinks about his looks, nor do I care if he meets the cultural standards for male beauty, but I have to like the way he looks. Not just with his clothes on but naked.

I also have to like him as a person, I have to like his mind and how it works. That, is far more important to me than his looks.

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 11:37:53 AM

LadiesBladewing

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Appearance is somewhat important, but only as an "addendum" to everything else. If we could only train ONE servant, and we had two equally qualified candidates in every other way, the one who carried him or herself with quiet dignity and a sense of self-respect would be chosen over one who was slovenly and careless with dress or person. Fortunately, that isn't an issue -- however, we will still gravitate towards that potential servant who shows him or herself to have that potential to be a servant to Ladies.

I am not exactly the "current social standard" in appearance, but I am just right for -me-, and for the way that I am meant to fit in this world. I won't apologize for my appearance, or make denigrating remarks about myself, just because society doesn't happen to agree with the way that I have been shaped by the Universe. At the same time, some people may not appreciate me because they only see the flesh shell that I wear, and they cannot bring themselves to accept that. I can appreciate that that is where they are at, and am happier to have them just go their own way than to try to "fake" it so as not to be rude.

Lady Zephyr

quote:

ORIGINAL: talmar

Dommes how important ar a subs looks to you? Subs how important are a Dommes looks to you?

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 11:58:46 AM

LadyHibiscus

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I do not look for perfect beauty in my playmates or minions, though of course it's nice to find it! I DO expect my men to be clean and neatly dressed, regardless of their size or shape. Scruffiness is not acceptable unless we are doing something scruffy!

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 12:58:30 PM

MysticalPhoenix

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I do not look for perfect beauty in my playmates or minions, though of course it's nice to find it! I DO expect my men to be clean and neatly dressed, regardless of their size or shape. Scruffiness is not acceptable unless we are doing something scruffy!

I would definitely say that good grooming is way more important than physical beauty, when it comes to my list. And good manners over all.

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 1:32:33 PM

DarkDove

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From: Tennessee
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Depends on the type of slave. If im seeking a pleasure slave then yes I would have to find him/her physically appealing, but they wont get anywhere on looks alone not even as a pleasure slave.

For all other slaves I wouldnt say I consider looks an issue at all. I also expect good grooming and proper hygiene. I expect them to have a personality. I cannot stand the ZOMBIES!! Sense of humor is a must as well. I am a Domme but that doesnt mean I dont have normal conversations and enjoy laughter. Personality and Humor would be essential especially for a live in candidate.

DG

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 1:43:03 PM

talmar

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I think it is very honest to acknowlege that it is a factor but maybe not the most important factor. Thats how I feel as well. I think everyone puts some importance on looks whether they admit it or not.

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 1:45:11 PM

talmar

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The most important factor in finding a play partner for me is chemistry & shared interests. Personality is important.

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 5:01:00 PM

thetammyjo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MysticalPhoenix

I've never tried to measure how important, but the way my sub looks is important to me.

I don't care what anyone else thinks about his looks, nor do I care if he meets the cultural standards for male beauty, but I have to like the way he looks. Not just with his clothes on but naked.

I also have to like him as a person, I have to like his mind and how it works. That, is far more important to me than his looks.

What the lady said.

Of course I've had different types of slaves -- some I've been physical or sexual intimate with and others I've not been. For me to be that physical/sexual level of intimacy I need to be with someone I consider attractive physically as well and mentally.

I can's say exactly what those qualities are though because it seems more a balance between physical and non-physical. For example hair: I really don't like long hair on men yet I've had slaves I've been physically/sexually intimate with who have longer hair. There were other qualities (and tying it back) that made the long hair less important.

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 5:16:24 PM

LadyMorgynn

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For me as well, physical beauty (as defined by society) is not that important. It's the character that attracts me, the mind behind the face. I do have *preferences* ...things that I am specifically attracted to (i.e. long hair), but I certainly don't use that as a measuring stick for choosing a submissive. It's just a bonus if he has long hair. Along with many of the others who have replied here, good grooming and hygiene is crucial, and for me also, how he carries himself.

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/29/2005 6:52:58 PM

HouseofBear

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Most of us have physical attributes that turn us on or off. However, what is most important are character, attitude, a willingness to learn, a loving nature, a willingness to serve somewhere besides the bedroom or playroom, intelligence, and other things more related to the non physical are way more important to me.

Lady Ursa

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 5:47:18 AM

addcted2it

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From: Sonoma County, California, USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: talmar

Dommes how important ar a subs looks to you? Subs how important are a Dommes looks to you?

Why would physical attraction be any different here than in the vanilla world?

- addcted2it

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 7:11:09 AM

LadyMorgynn

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It isn't any different. What *is* different, is that physical attraction may not play so much of a role in the choice of Dom/Domme or submissive in *this* world.

quote:

ORIGINAL: addcted2it

quote:

ORIGINAL: talmar

Dommes how important ar a subs looks to you? Subs how important are a Dommes looks to you?

Why would physical attraction be any different here than in the vanilla world?

- addcted2it

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 7:42:45 AM

fastlane

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I think looks are very important when it comes to first impressions and first meetings, as is confidence. However, physical flaws amongst us who do not look like movie stars can be a strong indication of character and make one appear more attractive.
Of course, lots of money always makes one look good too!

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 8:12:25 AM

LadyMorgynn

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Now, see, that's where personal preference comes in. I see those polished, so-called "beautiful" people, and I think, ick. See that guy there in the lumber yard, with his flannel shirt and the shaggy dark hair falling into his eyes? MAJOR yum! Or the nicely dressed kid (I'm 50, so anybody under 35 is a "kid" to me, LOL) wearing pleated slacks with a V-neck sweater over a shirt, wtih the arms pushed back. The "polish" or glow that money can provide, is a real turnoff to me, and indicates that what is inside is probably as cardboard as the outside. I want someone REAL, and who looks REAL.

This, from a woman who has a lifesize standee of Aragorn in her office <laughing>

quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane

I think looks are very important when it comes to first impressions and first meetings, as is confidence. However, physical flaws amongst us who do not look like movie stars can be a strong indication of character and make one appear more attractive.
Of course, lots of money always makes one look good too!

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 12:03:42 PM

LadiesBladewing

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In a way, I'm on the other end of the scale here. While physical appearance isn't crucial in terms of face, hair color, etc., when it comes to dress and carriage, I want to dress my male/butch servant up in "stripes and tails", vest, cravat, and white gloves while he serves tea, and uniform him in dark suit of wool and linen with a butler's vest, cravat and our crest at the breast. I want our female/femme servants corseted beneath a crisp mid-calf linen skirt and shirtwaist, aproned with an immaculate cotton apron and a dainty cap. Exquisite!

Of course, before one can get to that point, things like posture, carriage, and graceful movement have to be taught. The same uniform that looks completely dashing on someone who carries him or herself well looks ridiculous on a slump-shouldered, sway-backed, foot-dragging body.

I look forward to the day when we have a household that can justify me purchasing my dream uniforms. *grins*

Lady Zephyr

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyMorgynn

Now, see, that's where personal preference comes in. I see those polished, so-called "beautiful" people, and I think, ick. See that guy there in the lumber yard, with his flannel shirt and the shaggy dark hair falling into his eyes? MAJOR yum! Or the nicely dressed kid (I'm 50, so anybody under 35 is a "kid" to me, LOL) wearing pleated slacks with a V-neck sweater over a shirt, wtih the arms pushed back. The "polish" or glow that money can provide, is a real turnoff to me, and indicates that what is inside is probably as cardboard as the outside. I want someone REAL, and who looks REAL.

This, from a woman who has a lifesize standee of Aragorn in her office <laughing>

quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane

I think looks are very important when it comes to first impressions and first meetings, as is confidence. However, physical flaws amongst us who do not look like movie stars can be a strong indication of character and make one appear more attractive.
Of course, lots of money always makes one look good too!

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 12:56:36 PM

Misstoyou

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quote:

ORIGINAL: talmar

Dommes how important ar a subs looks to you?

Oh, I'm definitely shallow, lol, but then again, beauty's in the eye of the beholder.

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a.k.a. "mean Lady"

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 1:19:47 PM

fastlane

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My new years resolution...is

I will only love, butt ugly people from here on out.

After all, every one needs a hug....and a smack on the Ass, ugly or not!

Will this get me into Heaven?

Peace, Kevin

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 1:31:11 PM

ADetroitLady

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posted in error

< Message edited by ADetroitLady -- 12/30/2005 1:34:49 PM >

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RE: Dommes how important are looks to you? - 12/30/2005 1:41:57 PM

FTopinMichigan