RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play setting..

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play setting..

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play setting..

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/18/2008 10:04:00 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Count Me in as another one who can be easily won over with a diet soda as part of an introduction. It means they bothered enough to know that I don't drink coffee and a regular soda won't be as well received.

People have associated a lot of different terms for Me. I've been called everything from "the new generation of leather" to a "scene celebrity." When it comes down to it, the best compliment that I receive is that I'm the most approchable Domme that most folks would ever want to meet. It's very easy to walk up to Me and say hello. When meeting new people, I'm just glad that they are willing to say hi. I'm just glad that people want to meet Me and get to know Me a little.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to ShaktiSama)

Post #: 21

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/18/2008 11:00:37 PM

MaamJay

Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline

In a public play setting, the best time and place to approach Me is when I'm seated at the supper table because then I am definitely "off duty" and available for conversation. As a typically laidback Aussie, I, unlike some Dommes, don't mind a fairly direct approach along the lines of "Hi, i'm ___ and i am wanting to learn more about being a sub. Would You mind if i asked You a question?" I like it because (a) now I know your name, (b) now I know which side of the slash you'd like to be on and (c) you've played right into My court by appealing to My love of teaching! If the timing isn't convenient, eg I'd just told the sub I am there with that he should prepare for some more play, I can tell you to watch and wait and I will answer some questions later. It all puts the power in My hands as to how future interaction goes and that I appreciate.

One boy was successful in striking up a conversation because he watched my sub side violet play with Master, came up later once I was at the supper table (play always gives Me the munchies) and said "Wow, i was amazed at how many strokes you took, i only hope i can take half as many when i eventually find someone to spank me!" Whereupon I informed him I was Domme as well as sub and I might be able to help him find out sometime

(he didn't make half LOL!).

Haven't had a really bad intro from a sub (have had a few from Doms!) ... other than the one who got so tongue-tied it took him ages to spit out his name and question! That was hard going.

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 22

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/23/2008 5:34:45 PM

SlaveBlutarsky

Posts: 491
Joined: 10/10/2005
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline

I usually leave a note on her car the next day after spending the night outside her house, that's got me nothing but great responses.

I've never understood why people think there's some magic bullet for meeting people or introducing themselves, like the perfect 'line.' In both a D/s and lifestyle sense, I've found that 'hello, I'm slave blutarsky, how are you?' with a nice warm smile has always done the trick. I can count the number of times I've varied this technique on one hand in my life. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but in most cases if a woman has any interest in talking to you, that's all you need, any stupid line or honorific in a D/s sense is just going to worsen your chances.

_____________________________

Strong for all, weak for one

(in reply to ShaktiSama)

Post #: 23

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/24/2008 1:34:39 AM

E2Sweet

Posts: 649
Joined: 7/8/2008
From: TopLeftCornerOf, OH, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlaveBlutarsky
I usually leave a note on her car the next day after spending the night outside her house, that's got me nothing but great responses.

^^

^^

I was thinking a cable pulley system to lower you from the ceiling and a Fartman costume might be the way to go... I could be wrong...

Seriously though, just be yourself, relax and say "hello" when the timing feels right. Although they don't often want others to know it, a good many dominant women are actually pretty sweet and approachable... for the most part... Then again, maybe its all an elaborate ruse to lure you into a trap... Either way, its a win-win.

< Message edited by E2Sweet -- 12/24/2008 1:37:32 AM >

_____________________________

E2Sweet™
"If it doesn't make you smile then chances are you're not doing it right."

(in reply to SlaveBlutarsky)

Post #: 24

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/24/2008 4:13:28 AM

thishereboi

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: squirrelfury

quote:

ORIGINAL: Usako

The "Hello, my name is BLANK, it's nice to meet you"

Just don't follow it with, "You killed my father. Prepare to die."

More seriously, I've found that if you're unsure how to introduce yourself, a good way to get an introduction is simply ask someone who is familiar with both of you, and is presumably on friendly terms with the person you'd like to meet, to make the introductions. Assuming you have a good reputation in your local group, being introduced by a shared acquaintance can be a less agaonizing way to go about meeting new people.

(originally edited for daft spelling, now re-edited because I didn't realize this linked to the Ask A Mistress area...sorry *sheepish smile*)

Oh I don't know, that would probibly make me laugh. And it would show we had at least one thing in common.

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert

This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to squirrelfury)

Post #: 25

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/24/2008 6:02:02 AM

beeble

Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

Usako wrote: "Hello, my name is BLANK, it's nice to meet you"
squirrelfury wrote: Just don't follow it with, "You killed my father. Prepare to die."
thishereboi wrote: Oh I don't know, that would probibly make me laugh. And it would show we had at least one thing in common.

What, you mean you killed his father, too?

beeble.

(in reply to thishereboi)

Post #: 26

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/24/2008 6:19:04 AM

gumshoe

Posts: 68
Joined: 10/13/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UmbraDomina

This is from my journal ............ It might help :)

how to met and grow into a releationship with a female dominant.

This is a quote from my journal:

World's worst pick up line.

'Get yer coat darling you're pulled.'

World's best blow out line.

'Get lost, I've already got one arsehole in my nickers!!'

Edited to say 'well I thought it was funny.'

< Message edited by gumshoe -- 12/24/2008 6:20:32 AM >

_____________________________

Where there is no imagination there is no horror, Arthur Conan-Doyle.

(in reply to UmbraDomina)

Post #: 27

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/24/2008 9:36:51 AM

darchChylde

Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline

I know that this is more for anecdotal answers than advice; but as others have chimed in with the latter, I shall as well.

For those smokers, at events where you have to adjourn to a specific area to smoke you will find that you already have something in common with those already gathered there. Also, most women (dominant or not) will appreciate it if you unobtrusively offer to light their cigarette. It can easily start a conversation and is not generally considered an intrusive or presumptuously submissive act. For that matter, I believe that all men should carry a working lighter at all times in public for the express purpose of light a lady's cigarette; it is a mark of a gentleman.

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to gumshoe)

Post #: 28

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/25/2008 2:12:48 PM

SteveAndJaz

Posts: 151
Joined: 11/22/2008
Status: offline

Jaz says

Best ones are those who make conversation, show respect but also show they have there own strengths are ambitious and somewhat fussy about who they submit to. No Mistress wants a guy that will submit to every Domme, Dick or Harry!

Worst one that comes to mind was at a summer party when I was taking a fem sub with a strap-on in the middle of a croquet lawn when this guy comes marching up and says 'excuse me'. At first I ignored him but he was most insistent on interrupting. I eventually looked up and asked him what he wanted and he asked 'when you have finished with her can I have a go?

(in reply to ShaktiSama)

Post #: 29

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/25/2008 6:13:30 PM

pinnipedster

Posts: 217
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

For that matter, I believe that all men should carry a working lighter at all times in public for the express purpose of light a lady's cigarette; it is a mark of a gentleman.

I'm afraid I'm in the crowd of "A true gentleman would decline to assist the lady in hastening her ugly death from lung disease," but to each his own.

(in reply to darchChylde)

Post #: 30

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/26/2008 7:48:58 PM

MsFlutter

Posts: 1305
Joined: 11/12/2008
From: East Coast
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: squirrelfury

quote:

ORIGINAL: Usako

The "Hello, my name is BLANK, it's nice to meet you"

Just don't follow it with, "You killed my father. Prepare to die."

LOLOL - this time YOU are the reason I have to clean iced tea off my screen !!

_____________________________

'Dont torture yourself, Gomez darling. That's my job' Morticia Addams

"The right data, filtered through an idiot, can yield a bad answer." einstien5201

(in reply to squirrelfury)

Post #: 31

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 12/27/2008 2:14:35 PM

tornaway

Posts: 174
Joined: 4/14/2007
Status: offline

The worst one ? Someone who , upon my entering the room , immediately came over and said nothing - but stood entirely too close next to me - while giving me sideways glances up and down , and groaning softly , like he was in heat or something . After he followed me around abit - all without saying a word , I finally asked him to give me some breathing room ! I found the whole thing most unappealing .

The best ? A lovely male sub wearing very little, approached respectfully , and quietly went to his knees at my feet . Then he looked up at me and asked softly if he might kiss my hand - which I allowed . We ended up playing later that evening , and he was delightful !

(in reply to ShaktiSama)

Post #: 32

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 1/1/2009 9:57:40 PM

darchChylde

Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pinnipedster

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

For that matter, I believe that all men should carry a working lighter at all times in public for the express purpose of light a lady's cigarette; it is a mark of a gentleman.

I'm afraid I'm in the crowd of "A true gentleman would decline to assist the lady in hastening her ugly death from lung disease," but to each his own.

And I suppose you would never help an old lady across the street, because it may hasten an ugly death from the impact of a bus. Seriously, where is judging another considered gentlemanly?

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to pinnipedster)

Post #: 33

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 1/2/2009 1:23:38 AM

BondageBarbieX

Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline

I generally do not approach anyone with out my Daddy's approval

(in reply to needstheOne)

Post #: 34

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 1/2/2009 5:13:58 AM

beeble

Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

darchChylde wrote: For that matter, I believe that all men should carry a working lighter at all times in public for the express purpose of light a lady's cigarette; it is a mark of a gentleman.
pinnipedster wrote: I'm afraid I'm in the crowd of "A true gentleman would decline to assist the lady in hastening her ugly death from lung disease," but to each his own.
darchChylde wrote: And I suppose you would never help an old lady across the street, because it may hasten an ugly death from the impact of a bus.

On the contrary. Helping the old lady across the road means that she's less likely to be hit by a bus than she would be if she crossed on her own. Lighting somebody's cigarette means that they (and you) are more likely to die of lung cancer than if the cigarette remained unlit.

quote:

darchChylde wrote: Seriously, where is judging another considered gentlemanly?

I'm not sure which part you think is judgemental. I don't feel I'm being judgemental by failing to make a special effort to help people smoke, to choose a fairly neutral phrasing. To choose a more aggressive phrasing, I also don't feel that I'm being judgemental by refusing to help people poison the air I breathe. I don't judge people who smoke; I merely refuse to help them do so.

If you feel pinnipedster's suggestion that you're being ungentlemanly by lighting women's cigarettes to be judgemental, how is that any more judgemental than your suggestion that I am being ungentlemanly by refusing to do so?

beeble

(in reply to darchChylde)

Post #: 35

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 1/2/2009 9:46:12 AM

darchChylde

Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline

If it is indoors, you might have a point about poisoning your air but outdoors you get worse from automobile and industrial emissions. As a matter of fact, automobile emissions are almost the exact same chemical consistency as exhaled cigarette smoke and there are a lot more cars out there than smokers.

As far as lighting a lady's cigarette, she most likely has her own light; just like opening her door, it's not about doing something for her that she cannot do for herself but doing something that she should not have to do for herself if there is a gentleman about.

To your point about my judging him for not lighting a lady's smoke, it's not that he doesn't but why that is judgmental on his part. Also, I feel a right to judge in this instance as I am speaking from a long-standing "code" of what a gentleman does and how he behaves; while, on the other hand, you are both speaking from actual personal prejudice.

Just so you know, about the old lady and the bus... my next sentence had the word "seriously", clearly implying that the line about getting hit by a bus was sarcastic. I suppose I should unpack and dust off my "Sarcastic Hat" for future use.

*darchChylde walks away, a member of one of the few minorities it is still okay to discriminate against*

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to beeble)

Post #: 36

RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play ... - 1/2/2009 11:22:52 AM

beeble

Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

darchChylde wrote:
To your point about my judging him for not lighting a lady's smoke, it's not that he doesn't but why that is judgmental on his part. Also, I feel a right to judge in this instance as I am speaking from a long-standing "code" of what a gentleman does and how he behaves; while, on the other hand, you are both speaking from actual personal prejudice.

There is a large and widely-accepted body of scientific literature going back fifty years that says that smoking is harmful to health. I don't feel that refusing to participate in somebody's self-harm is prejudicial behaviour.

t was also a long-standing code that a gentleman should earn a good living, while his wife stayed at home and looked after the house and children. But if I claimed that women should stay at home because of this code, I'd be rightly flamed as being prejudiced. `It's a long-standing code' isn't an argument. The action has to be judged on its own merits.

Now, to be clear, I don't feel that it's ungentlemanly for you to light a woman's cigarette. Unless she's run out of matches or lighter fuel, she'd just light it herself if nobody did it for her, as you say. But I do reject the idea that it's ungentlemanly of me not to do the same, particularly as I'd have to go out of my way to do so. (More like crossing the street to hold a door open, rather than holding one for somebody walking immediately behing you.)

quote:

Just so you know, about the old lady and the bus... my next sentence had the word "seriously", clearly implying that the line about getting hit by a bus was sarcastic. I suppose I should unpack and dust off my "Sarcastic Hat" for future use.

Ah. I read it as being emphatic: the same sort of usage as in `Seriously, you need to do X' meaning `You *really* need to do X' rather than `I'm not being light-hearted, now: you need to do X.' Apologies for the misunderstanding

quote:

*darchChylde walks away, a member of one of the few minorities it is still okay to discriminate against*

What, smokers? If you want to poison yourself and other consenting adults in private, go ahead. It is absolutely *not* discrimination to require you not to poison other people. It would be discrimination to say `I will not employ you because you smoke' or `I will not employ you because you are gay'; it is not discrimination to say, `You may not smoke at work' or `You may not have gay (or any other kind of) sex at work.'

beeble

(in reply to darchChylde)

Post #: 37

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: Proper way to introduce your self in a public play setting..

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.109