RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut

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RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut - 12/18/2008 9:30:17 AM

agirl

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Joined: 6/14/2004
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The term *pain slut*, like lots of other soundbitey phrases don't sum a person up. They don't even go very far as a description of someone's ability to find pleasure in pain.

When I read it, I always STILL need to ask....* What do you mean?*

A light spanking?
A restrained flogging with a soft suede flogger?
A sensual caning with light stinging?
A whipping with a single tail that lightly cracks on your skin?
A heavy spanking that causes you to bleed?
A violent flogging with plaited leather tails?
A hard caning from cold, that welts, breaks the skin and leaves blood trailing?
A whipping that slices into your flesh?

I still want to know what they call a 'craving'. Is it the pain itself, or is it everything surrounding the pain........the attention, the intimacy, the shared experience, the suffering, the challenge?etc etc.

Painslut....says very little to me, really.

agirl

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RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut - 12/18/2008 9:48:38 AM

oceanwynds

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Joined: 8/24/2006
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I am not sure but perhaps used the wrong terminolgy in writing this post. I have never been hit prior to Sir. I have been a victim of sexual abuse more then several times. I was long ago involved in an emotional abusive relationship, that is it. I was never struck though in a relationship.

My father did not believe women should be hit, so we didn't get spankings. My sister and I just never got hit. My brother did though.

When I first experienced pain through the use of Sir's belt, though it hurt, I liked what I felt afterwards. It was for me more of release of tensions, just to name one result. This left me craving for the next session, and the next..

I was surprised that I craved this type of play, and find it sometimes confusing that I do. I learned a lot from the people who posted, and am turning my thinking around.

oceanwynds

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RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut - 12/18/2008 10:00:12 AM

agirl

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Joined: 6/14/2004
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I've never been in an abusive relationship, ever...and never been a victim of anything.

I'd hazard a guess that it's simply new experiences that are creating feelings you haven't felt in the same combination before ...........and as they are attached to your *man*, they have a positive connotation. You seem to crave what it brings you, rather than the activity itself. But to get that , you have to go through the activity.

I'm not the type of person that suffers a great deal of angst about anything I find enjoyable. I just head off along there and go with the flow.

agirl

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Post #: 43

RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut - 12/18/2008 10:14:10 AM

oceanwynds

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I tend to have to take apart everything and analyse. I ponder many things to the point it can lead me to nowhere land. Because of this, I started to ask other submissives/slave questions. The Dom view is always welcome too.

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RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut - 12/18/2008 11:24:32 AM

myotherself

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Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
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My first dominant was a sadist, and I found through him that I enjoyed the effects of pain. It hurts - god it hurts! - but the other sensations were fantastic. I had never had an orgasm through sex, but now I have multiples if pain is involved.

I now identify as a pain slut. I have played with more than a few tops/partners and each has said how impressed they are at how much pain I can take, and how strong my sexual reaction is to the the pain.

To begin with I thought there was something wrong with me for wanting pain. I did a lot of soul-searching, and it was only when I got involved in the local scene and started talking to people, I found out that being a pain slut is something to celebrate, and I find I never lack for the company of sadists, lol!

It's part of me, and I've learned to love it and be proud of it. You should too!

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RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut - 12/18/2008 2:32:50 PM

oceanwynds

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I am working on it myotherself. I found some great advice on the thread and on the other side. Think just knowing that I wasnt the only one to got through this type of processing has been a major help.

I do thank those who never had to adjust to it and those who did and replying to my post.

oceanwynds

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Post #: 46

RE: Accepting oneself as a pain slut - 12/18/2008 5:41:57 PM

kyraofMists

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Joined: 7/29/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cpK69
Is it wrong to think that not all things that people enjoy to make them feel good, are good for them? Is there nothing to say for intent?

I think this is an important point. Motivation plays a big part in whether an activity is healthy for you or not and things that make you feel good are not always good for you.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

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Post #: 47