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ORIGINAL: slimon62

First off I've know this girl for a few months now.  I really care about her a lot and enjoy just spending time with her.  Her and I have talked at great length about D/s and what it means to each of us.  Lately though she has asked me for space for reasons I can not share. 

I know she cares about me because she has told me several times and the reason she wants the space is to figure some things out and does not want to hurt me in the process.  I understand everything she has talked to me about.  But heres the problem.  Being a Dom by nature I feel the need to be there for her when she needs it the most.  I want to help her in any way that she needs it, even if it is with giving her the space she requests.  Although it has been hard for me to do so.

So my question is this...How long should I wait for her?  Do I keep giving her the space that she asked me for?  Or should I still just drop the occasional message to her that I am thinking about her and hope she is alright?  I'm truely baffled about this.  I don't want her to feel like I am pressuring her but at the same time I don't like being left in the dark either.  Any help would be graciously appreciated.

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I'm truely baffled about this.

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How long should I wait for her?

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I really don't think she has dumbed me. Or has moved on. She just needs some time to think.

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ORIGINAL: slimon62

She just needs some time to think.

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ORIGINAL: slimon62

First off I've know this girl for a few months now.  I really care about her a lot and enjoy just spending time with her.  Her and I have talked at great length about D/s and what it means to each of us.  Lately though she has asked me for space for reasons I can not share. 

I know she cares about me because she has told me several times and the reason she wants the space is to figure some things out and does not want to hurt me in the process.  I understand everything she has talked to me about.  But heres the problem.  Being a Dom by nature I feel the need to be there for her when she needs it the most.  I want to help her in any way that she needs it, even if it is with giving her the space she requests.  Although it has been hard for me to do so.

So my question is this...How long should I wait for her?  Do I keep giving her the space that she asked me for?  Or should I still just drop the occasional message to her that I am thinking about her and hope she is alright?  I'm truely baffled about this.  I don't want her to feel like I am pressuring her but at the same time I don't like being left in the dark either.  Any help would be graciously appreciated.

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ORIGINAL: oceanwynds

She sounds a little bit like me to be honest. If i am going through something major, i will back off so I can get through some thoughts. I also know that I can go into self-sabatoge and blow up anything good between Sir and me. Sir understands this and supports me doing this. I do keep in contact with him a couple times a week while i am sorting things out.

In regards to how long to wait, depends what is going on. From what you said, seems just something that just came up. She should be able to get her footing within a couple weeks, so she can then communicate better with you.

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ORIGINAL: slimon62

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ORIGINAL: oceanwynds

She sounds a little bit like me to be honest. If i am going through something major, i will back off so I can get through some thoughts. I also know that I can go into self-sabatoge and blow up anything good between Sir and me. Sir understands this and supports me doing this. I do keep in contact with him a couple times a week while i am sorting things out.

In regards to how long to wait, depends what is going on. From what you said, seems just something that just came up. She should be able to get her footing within a couple weeks, so she can then communicate better with you.

yes, that is exactly what is going on.  I figured someone would have experianced this before.  I do realize that how long i wait is a personal decision, but like i said, i care for her alot.  I know she needs someone right now and I've told her several times that I would be there for her when she needs it.  I"m a man of my word and when i make a promise, I intend to keep it.  Thanks =)

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ORIGINAL: oceanwynds

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ORIGINAL: slimon62

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ORIGINAL: oceanwynds

She sounds a little bit like me to be honest. If i am going through something major, i will back off so I can get through some thoughts. I also know that I can go into self-sabatoge and blow up anything good between Sir and me. Sir understands this and supports me doing this. I do keep in contact with him a couple times a week while i am sorting things out.

yeah, i'm sure if she didn't want me around, i'd get the go piss off message to be honest as well.
In regards to how long to wait, depends what is going on. From what you said, seems just something that just came up. She should be able to get her footing within a couple weeks, so she can then communicate better with you.

yes, that is exactly what is going on.  I figured someone would have experianced this before.  I do realize that how long i wait is a personal decision, but like i said, i care for her alot.  I know she needs someone right now and I've told her several times that I would be there for her when she needs it.  I"m a man of my word and when i make a promise, I intend to keep it.  Thanks =)

You are welcome. You know her situation and know if her request is honorable or not, imo. Sir is great with me when i need to sort out things. It is easier for him as well, but out of courtesy i do keep in touch a couple times a week, so he knows i am still alive and around.

Sir has had to also do the same to me, when he needed to straighten things out. We understand this behavior, perhaps crazy to many, but it works for us for 2 and half years. Also worked for my late hubby and me as well.
Just got to make sure you know the person to do this, because many will take the polite way to tell you to 'kiss' off. i am not that polite, perhaps that is one good thing about me..

oceanwynds