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Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 3:14:52 PM   
Surrenderwithin


Posts: 368
Joined: 10/8/2006
Status: offline 		I posted a topic in the "Ask a Master forum" about preemptive service. However, my question for the bottoms/submissives/etc. is slightly different.

Do you enjoy offering preemptive service or do you prefer to wait for a specific order to be given or request made. Why do you have that preference?
Maggi
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RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 3:39:54 PM   
Rayne58


Posts: 746
Joined: 2/22/2005
From: Sydney Australia
Status: offline 		We've been together for five years, so I pretty much know what is required and when.  But I still ask what He would like to eat though, because sometimes His tummy is a bit icky and He won't be up for a three course meal when a cheese and tomato sandwich will do

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Collared sub and married to Nevershyau

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
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RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 3:49:37 PM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		I like a combination of the two.  I like to surprise my Master by doing something special for him, yet other times I am very comfortable following specific instructions.  He tends to give very general instructions and to let me use my creativity to complete the task so I get a nice blend of both.  

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RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 4:04:13 PM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline 		I know this was for subs, but any sub of Mine better learn to anticipate My needs--that's how they grow in value.

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I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
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RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 4:54:59 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		I have been performing anticipatory service my entire life, vanilla or non-vanilla.  If I don't know how someone likes something, I ask. 

The word "preemptive" bothers me, because to me it means doing something in order to take choices away from someone else.  Anticipatory service, on the other hand, is paying attention to someone's needs so that it does not come to their own attention that something is lacking. 

Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to CatdeMedici)
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RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 6:20:48 PM   
lockmeupplease


Posts: 202
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline 		After awhile, I am pretty sure of what my Mistress wants to be done and look to please by doing those things without being asked.  I think it's hard to go wrong anticipating their needs.

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 6:24:50 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I don't, and it's gotten me in trouble.  My view is "Until you specifically train me on how you want it, I don't want to risk moving your stuff so you can't find it or messing with your system however it is"  I find it respectful of their space and time.

But other subs have cut me down for it.  Maybe they didn't have picky ex owners like I have.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to lockmeupplease)
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RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 6:33:45 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		I like "anticipatory service" better than "preemptive service."  "Preemptive service" sounds like you're about to send in the troops.

And yes, what dom doesn't enjoy a little anticipatory service?  "Hey, how did you know I was planning to buy some snap hooks?"

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

I have been performing anticipatory service my entire life, vanilla or non-vanilla.

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 6:41:44 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

Do you enjoy offering preemptive service or do you prefer to wait for a specific order to be given or request made.


it depends.
 
pre-emptive service, to this slave, equates to trained to know how He wants it.
 
e.g., this slave knows how He wants His morning coffee or His come-home-in-the-evening-Monday-through-Friday-ritual.  she doesn't need explicit instruction on that.

if it is regarding something spontaneous and random, she looks to Him and waits for His instruction.

quote:

Why do you have that preference?

His pleasure and desires are job #1---He dominates, in our relationship.

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 7:29:46 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		I know what he likes in the way of food and beverages - i always try to get what he likes at the grocery store.

As for what he wants, when he wants it - he asks or tells me what he wants - and that is the way i like it - i don't have to try to read his mind, it isn't made my responsibility to try, so i don't fail. As it is, he is 100% pleased with my service, because it is what he wants, when he wants it.

Other than that, meals and house cleaning are my responsibility, so i neither want or receive direction with when and what i do.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Preemptive service - 12/22/2008 7:49:54 PM   
Vinmier


Posts: 41
Joined: 12/5/2008
Status: offline 		I prefer both. There are many things I know my Lady likes, and I can do them to make her more comfortable. I also like when she asks certain tasks of me as well, because it tells me she likes how I perform said tasks. 

(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Preemptive service - 12/23/2008 3:10:48 AM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline 		I enjoy providing the sort of service which my dominant requires however which way it's required because that is what is likely to keep me in the relationship more than anything. Other than that I have no preference, because whichever way I get to express myself through submission.

I kind of figure that I have a brain, eyes, ears and a tongue, all of which help me communicate, and that in prioiritized ortder (1) I know what I'm doing (2) my dominant knows what I'm meant to be doing (3) I'm pretty good at making a guess when either (1) or (2) don't apply.

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(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Preemptive service - 12/23/2008 3:17:10 AM   
sula


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/22/2007
Status: offline 		Both!  Anticipating His needs, wants, desires and providing them un-bidden goes with the territory (for me).  As does being responsive to specific requests or orders.  i can read Master's moods and nuances pretty well, and would feel remiss if He had to always state what He wants.  He would likely not be too pleased with that either...

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you all!!!!

sula

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Preemptive service - 12/23/2008 7:02:08 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I can finish a sentence for him at this point in our relationship.  I know by looking at him if he is happy or hurting inside.  I also know how to cheer him up in a flash if he is down.  So, yes I anticipate his needs then fulfill them.

Yet at the same time change is nice now and then.  To throw me a curve ball so to speak. 

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Preemptive service - 12/23/2008 7:27:07 AM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		Count me in amongst those who prefer "anticipatory" to preemptive.  I came to know my former owner well enough to be able to anticipate what he might want and when, at times.  He enjoyed this as it made him feel well tended to.  I'd say my error rate in such guesses was less than 1%, and in those cases he still appreciated the effort behind the actions.

It was never a matter of what I enjoyed more.  I enjoyed pleasing and satisfying him, in whatever form that came - anticipatory or specifically instructed.

With the man I'm seeing now, I don't know him well enough to anticipate much, but there will be times when we're together that I'll ask..."Would you like....such n such?"  But I won't just up and do something.


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Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Preemptive service - 12/23/2008 8:03:55 AM   
FlamingRedhead


Posts: 451
Joined: 3/4/2007
From: Georgia
Status: offline 		I prefer to wait for a specific order to be given or request made because I'm not a mind reader.  I don't know, until he tells me, how he likes things done in his house.  I don't know what is okay to touch and what is not.  I don't know where anything goes.  I'm also not what one would describe as service oriented, so if he wants a refill on his drink or something, he needs to ask for it or set the empty glass in front of me.  Now, once I know how he wants his laundry done or what he expects me to do when I come over, I don't have to keep being reminded....except maybe the empty glass thing because I don't drink many fluids myself so.....

_____________________________

I'm so addicted to
All the things you do
When you're going down on me
In between the sheets
Or the sound you make
With every breath you take
It's unlike anything
When you're loving me

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Preemptive service - 12/23/2008 3:51:11 PM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		It is no my place to preempt any decisions.  It's not my place to try and anticipate either.
I am instructed, learn, know and do.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to Surrenderwithin)
Profile   Post #: 17
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