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The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 12:07:11 AM   
spoiledbrat


Posts: 75
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline 		[code]

Nobody like's to disappoint their owner not in the least, especially when it comes to play time. So what do you do if the only time he ever finds it in himself to play is late at night when your dead tired and you have no real energy to play. The desire is there but the energy isn't.

How can I get him to change his ways (yes I know ha ha)
Serious, It seems latley I feel like he does it on purpose so that we don't have to play, it has been so very long now, a year since I have had play.



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Love Always
Me
Spoiledbrat

Like our Favorite Black Dress
Character
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Autumn
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RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 2:10:32 AM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Take a nap earlier in the day so you dont feel so tired.

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to spoiledbrat)
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RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 4:44:12 AM   
FTopinMichigan


Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline 		Interesting, and I bet not so uncommon of a situation either.

I recently noticed an increase of contacts that have shown the propensity for this exact same thing.

I'm a VERY early morning type person, even though I seem to still have good energy in the evening. I get up between 5-6 am. When I've had contacts tell me they work nights, and sleep in until 11 - Noon...I know there'll be a mismatch from the get go.

Seems all you can do is talk about the situation with him, and work toward enjoying the same schedule...at least on a planned basis sometimes.

My best to you two.
K

(in reply to spoiledbrat)
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RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 6:33:27 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: spoiledbrat
How can I get him to change his ways (yes I know ha ha)
Serious, It seems latley I feel like he does it on purpose so that we don't have to play, it has been so very long now, a year since I have had play

Agrees with FTop, have you tried to work your schedule or change some priorities such that you can be more rested at those prime times?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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Profile   Post #: 4
RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 6:46:15 AM   
Tristan


Posts: 330
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline 		If you have gone a year without play, something else is happening with both of you.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 6:49:39 AM   
daredevil865


Posts: 130
Joined: 11/9/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tristan

If you have gone a year without play, something else is happening with both of you.



a year without play....I agree this is much more then just a time issue...

DareDevil

_____________________________



DareDevil

A true Master exhibits honor, integrity, honesty, self discipline, personal responsibility and caring for his property.

If I had to explain it...you wouldn't understand

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RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 6:52:54 AM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline 		i agree, talk aboute the problem and see what you can do to work through it for there can be a serious problem laying uder, but that is not nessesary horrible, after all problems are there to be solved as soon as you uncover them.

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RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 7:59:30 AM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		You have a problem. If it was a month or maybe two I'd say take a nap and rest up, but a YEAR? That means to me, without a doubt, that he's not interested. So the first question is: "Why?" Is he seeing someone else? Is he bored with you? Is he just plain tired of you? Or, is he no longer interested in the lifestyle? No matter which one, you need to talk (read communicate!) and get the problem out into the open so you can address it. You may not like the answers you get but you need to know.

_____________________________

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly ! !

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RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 8:39:54 AM   
spoiledbrat


Posts: 75
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

Thank you for all that responded to my problem, Yes, I also agree that there is more issue's hidden behind the surffice. I should of also stated that he didn't go a year with out play, just play with me.

This gentlemen I truly think has a issue with once you have them forget them, from what I have found out about him and his past.

Over the New Year I finally got out of this situation and look forward to a new life.

I do not know how long before I will feel desirable again in front of a Dominant after walking around naked collared and cuffed and never being touched.

Thank you again for the nice reaplies.

Happy New Year

love
spoiledbrat
autumn

_____________________________

Love Always
Me
Spoiledbrat

Like our Favorite Black Dress
Character
Never goes out of style


Autumn
Spoiledbrat


(in reply to Tristan)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 8:45:49 AM   
spoiledbrat


Posts: 75
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

Good morning,

Yes, I had tried talking and talking and talking. To find reasons that I tried to make sense of. Every new reason had a new hoop and every hoop I would complete a new hoop would form along with a new attitude from me. Being one who totally wanted to please for the first year I jumped thru every hoop over and over again. Cause I believed. Two years later when I didn't believe anymore I stopped jumping thru the hoops cause I just new a nother hoop would be there.

Hell, I even fell for the one hoop that was "I would be shocked if I found a surprise waiting for me one day when I got home. (another female)" So I tried that one also to be told that if I was good I would get play when he was done, but then life interfered with the time that would be mine.

I guess by writing this post I just wanted to see if it had been a common problem and was just notwanting to admitt the real problem's to anyone or myself.

I have now and have dealt with them, not in the way that I wanted to but in a way that at least my attitude is gone and I can go back to being happy I guess in Time.

Love
spoiledbrat
autumn

_____________________________

Love Always
Me
Spoiledbrat

Like our Favorite Black Dress
Character
Never goes out of style


Autumn
Spoiledbrat


(in reply to OscarHargraves)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 9:10:02 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: spoiledbrat

[code]

Nobody like's to disappoint their owner not in the least, especially when it comes to play time. So what do you do if the only time he ever finds it in himself to play is late at night when your dead tired and you have no real energy to play. The desire is there but the energy isn't.

How can I get him to change his ways (yes I know ha ha)
Serious, It seems latley I feel like he does it on purpose so that we don't have to play, it has been so very long now, a year since I have had play.




First, like everyone else has suggested, I would find out WHY you were not playing.
Then, sit down and talk with him. It can not be stressed enough...COMMUNICATION in any relationship is the most important thing. When you stop communicating, the relationship falls apart slowly.

quote:

Yes, I had tried talking and talking and talking. To find reasons that I tried to make sense of. Every new reason had a new hoop and every hoop I would complete a new hoop would form along with a new attitude from me. Being one who totally wanted to please for the first year I jumped thru every hoop over and over again. Cause I believed. Two years later when I didn't believe anymore I stopped jumping thru the hoops cause I just new a nother hoop would be there.


It sounds, and I am just going on what you have put here...but it sounds as if he may be reacting to YOUR discontent. You stated that you stopped trying ( jumping through hoops ) because you no longer believed? You need to sit down with him and talk about your relationship. It may have gone through some changes over the years that neither of you dealt with, and are now surfacing.

I wish you the best of luck :)

(in reply to spoiledbrat)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 6:57:57 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tristan

If you have gone a year without play, something else is happening with both of you.



I agree completely--something else is afoot-- and He is using the late night hours as an excuse---

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: The Correct Time - 1/2/2006 11:42:20 PM   
Petruchio


Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline 		I was thinking one thing right up until your last line, but Tristan, Neph, Oscar and other nailed it.

Something else is wrong. Will he talk about it?

There's a myriad of possible problems (health, emotions, psychological, depression…) and I commend you for working to figure out what's wrong.

Just twp minor points in an attempt to vet yourself:

1. You call yourself spoledbrat, and although I don't see that reflected in your profile, someone really spoilt or someone who expects her man to be 'on' 100% of the time can be tiring, even exhausting. Any chance this could be a problem?

2. Your profile does sound like you're still looking. Could this be affecting your relationship to your man?

(In some ways 1 and 2 are opposites of each other.)

I don't need the answers to the above, just the outline of a self-check.

(in reply to spoiledbrat)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: The Correct Time - 1/3/2006 6:07:40 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Petruchio

I was thinking one thing right up until your last line, but Tristan, Neph, Oscar and other nailed it.

Something else is wrong. Will he talk about it?

There's a myriad of possible problems (health, emotions, psychological, depression…) and I commend you for working to figure out what's wrong.

Just twp minor points in an attempt to vet yourself:

1. You call yourself spoledbrat, and although I don't see that reflected in your profile, someone really spoilt or someone who expects her man to be 'on' 100% of the time can be tiring, even exhausting. Any chance this could be a problem?

2. Your profile does sound like you're still looking. Could this be affecting your relationship to your man?

(In some ways 1 and 2 are opposites of each other.)

I don't need the answers to the above, just the outline of a self-check.


I actually have another issue with this.

In her FIRST post it was about how he was too busy and tired and wanted to play when SHE was too busy and tired.

My first reaction to this is that they both probably need to manage their time better and she should work on re-arranging her schedule and rhythms.

AFTER that we get all the news about other women and distractions and other things. Basically making it all his fault.

I'm not saying it's all her fault, I'm sure she does work and it is hard watching other people get play when she doesn't. But I think there's a major breakdown in the communication process with perhaps too much resentment to get through to solve this particular problem right now.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Petruchio)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: The Correct Time - 1/3/2006 7:30:46 AM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		I won't go through all the inconsistencies I've seen in what you have written in the last three days both on your profile and on the threads here. I'll just say this:

Quit your bitching and move on already.

Don't write about a Master who does not own you anymore. Learn from the experience and move on, my dear. What should you have learned, you ask? For one, to be open and honest about what you expect from a relationship and what is expected of you. And to know explicitly what is expected of you.

You are a beautiful woman, autumn. And the fact the you stuck thru this relationship even though you were unhappy shows tenacity, at least. Any would be owner will see value in that. But the fact that you can't move on after a relationship shows that you carry baggage. And baggage devalues a slave. Mt point here is don't devalue yourself by carrying this with you.

Just two cents from the casual observer.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

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RE: The Correct Time - 1/3/2006 1:10:10 PM   
SirDarkside357


Posts: 393
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline 		Have you tried to talk to Him about this? I have a strange schedual that seems to change a good deal, so when I am at my peak,sort of speak, she often is too warn-out, at times we still play, for Me, at times we don't until later, for her.....Although a Master is always the final word, it never hurts to be thoughtful from time to time, and besides, slaves love it when we're thoughtful WEG

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: The Correct Time - 1/3/2006 1:21:16 PM   
SirDarkside357


Posts: 393
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline 		One of these days I will learn to read all the post before answering, instead of just the first....it helps to know all that is said before answering or making a statement that makes you feel foolish LOL After reading all that was said and the profile, I should have passed on any comment, because it is a sure bet that she doesn't want to hear what I have to say WEG

(in reply to SirDarkside357)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: The Correct Time - 1/3/2006 3:50:06 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		this all seems pretty fishy - after reading another thread she has been prosubbing for the last two years. doesnt make any sence to me at all.
saying she never left the house cept to grocery store
no one in her life but her master for 2 yrs no friends etc.

(headspins)


_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to SirDarkside357)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: The Correct Time - 1/3/2006 6:16:30 PM   
Petruchio


Posts: 1615
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline 		Amen, MrD44, and a good 2¢ it was, too.

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: The Correct Time - 1/6/2006 10:55:41 AM   
spoiledbrat


Posts: 75
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

Just for the record and I am not in no way trying to be rude, I just would like to maybe lay out the facts a little more clearer for you.

1. Was his property for two years.
2. Job pro-submissive
3. No out to any thing other the grocery store in over a year and half.
reasons being
If I was good and deserved to go out, He was tired from work, we had no cash, he wasnt in the mood or just plain out life interferes as he says.

4. In regards to my work, that is my work, that is not my owner playing with me, that is some stranger coming over. If you serve someone you would like to have pleasure with that person not some stranger that books an appointment with you and pays for it.
Big big difference in it.

Nothing what I have said in any post is fishy, I dont have to lie or make things up. Just put it all together and you may get confused but one thing you shouldnt pull up is fish.



_____________________________

Love Always
Me
Spoiledbrat

Like our Favorite Black Dress
Character
Never goes out of style


Autumn
Spoiledbrat


(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 20
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