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pixidustpet -> RE: Male Perceptions of males (1/4/2009 12:14:53 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Roguescharm
quote:
ORIGINAL: LadyTeazer
This might be slightly off topic, but from the other side of the coin...... In a way, I can understand that opinion in a male Dom. As a female Domme, I admit that at times I have a rather unflattering opinion of female subs. Examples: a Dom and female sub are sitting on the couch, watching TV. He says "Go get me a beer/a glass of iced tea/a sandwich", or whatever. And even before he has finished speaking, she jumps up and races off to the kitchen. Or, he says "My shirts are not folded correctly" after she has spent hours doing the laundry, and she, in tears, apologizes profusely, and immediately re-folds them. My gut reaction to a scenario like that is "You dumb bunny. You're not a stupid doormat. Grow a backbone and act like you have a brain in your head." I do not mean to offend the female subs out there. This is just my opinion. I know that you choose to be a sub, because that is what you enjoy. But in certain circumstances, seeing a female behave like that (whether she is into BDSM, or is just very vanilla) really ruffles my feathers, as I feel that all the advances women have made have just been wiped out, and we're back in 1809 instead of 2009.
Sorry if I'm hijacking I just had to get this out. The above is almost exactly how I feel, and I feel all the worse for reacting this way because I identify as a sub. It's maddening. It doesn't matter how much I tell myself that it's their/our/my choice; I still feel like I'm somehow letting the side down. It sucks. [:'(]
Sorry for the interjection, it just sort of struck me like lightning.
As for the OP, I haven't had enough IRL interaction to see it, but I do come across it online. I can't say the subject gets my interest much, but I do wonder about the Doms who put down male subs a lot. Sometimes seems like they're over-compensating...
that.....hurt.
if its okay my choice as submissive/slave to be with a dominant, and my choice as that bottom/submissive/slave to let that dominant put me into situations that might do me lasting physical damage....why isnt it ok if i *choose* to jump up and get the partner of my choice something if s/he says so? or make sure the laundry/housework/cooking is done to that person's wishes?
i spent 16 years with wolf. i got up before he did to make him coffee and bring it to him in bed. rubbed his shoulders while he got awake. made sure his shirts were folded the way HE liked them, and his socks folded around one another (but not stretched over one another, because that ruined them) by left and right. and yes, there IS apparently a left and right sock. his work shirts hung on the hanger to where they faced left and not right, all work pants hung so that the pleat down the front was perfect.
wolf is not a dominant. *not* a dominant. but he was picky about some things and i never blinked after learning how he wanted things, it was just the way it is. i did things that made his life easier, and made him happy....because i didnt work outside the home, and it made it easier for him to relax and be "home" if he had things the way he liked them. me getting up to get him things, get his iced tea, serve his dinner (with the meat cut into the size pieces he preferred, or sandwiches cut into triangles NOT rectangles) was to make *me* happy, because it pleased me to see the smile and hear "thank you" and know he was content.
*sighs* now, i get down off the soapbox....
and OP, hearing that a friend of mine has discovered what makes them happy is a good thing, as long as it isnt self-destructive. being submissive isnt self-destructive.
kitten
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