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Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:30:42 PM   
SlaveIndigochild


Posts: 272
Status: offline 		i'm depressed. My 'reasons' are as thus....in no particular order....
i'm back to work tomorrow
i've a houseful of teens all rebelling, moaning, reverse sleeping...
i'm settling into a new relationship
i'm post operative with one arm in a sling immobilised for the next 6 weeks
i've got debts and am just about keeping my head above water
there's a deep deep recession reeking havoc with properties/shops/people's lives
there's bombing in Gaza
i'm depressed even more because i have no reasons to be depressed, that is:
my house isn't being bombed
my arm will heal and i have two of them
my Master loves me and is patient and kind
i'm a therapist and know about dissonance
the teens don't take drugs or drink and are all under my roof each night
i've anti bacteriological anti mrsa wipes that i can clean every surface of the foddam house with
i have a house to clean.......
recession makes everything cheaper, sometimes even 76%.....
but whilst there's bombing outside my head the bombing inside my head won't stop......
the dynamic i am living in doesn't feel politicized enough to be making a difference...
Rant over....anyone else depressed?


< Message edited by SlaveIndigochild -- 1/4/2009 12:31:42 PM >

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:32:59 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		*hugs Prinnie*

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:34:16 PM   
KyttynTheMynx


Posts: 4880
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From: Moosecrotch, Va
Status: offline 		You lived to see another year.  Thats a reason to NOT be depressed.  -hugs-

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:36:49 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
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From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		I am now that I read all this.   

Get well baby!

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:40:09 PM   
T1981


Posts: 557
Joined: 12/6/2008
Status: offline 		Some weeks are like that, where for no reason, the walls and doors that normally keep the state of the world at bay come crashing down, and it makes the rest of our heads a mess. I'm glad you could at least talk about it - it's easy to say we're depressed when someone dies or when we lose a house. It's much harder - and thus in it's way, much braver - to talk about when we're depressed in general.

I'm glad you could talk about it.


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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:44:00 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Hugs to you Indigo... too bad you can't get an all expense paid 'girly girl' day!  After surgery, life challenges and such... the normal and all that... can come that stupid unexplained depression.  I found even if you don't feel well enough to do a lot... a girly girl focus and a bit of uplifting self.. new hair style... massage or outting can help.  I wish I could come meet you for some lil girl fun!

Breath... keep breathing and if that doesn't work... we can go to Youtube and see if we can find something to laugh at!

Hell... just the after holiday blues can get someone... you have reason... just hang in there and know it does pass and we all love you!  Maybe a snuggle nap with Master would be nice.

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:44:24 PM   
bamagirl4u


Posts: 151
Joined: 12/25/2008
Status: offline 		I just posted a rant yesterday on another--yesterday was just an ultimate crappy day...but today is okay...lol..it will get better...just  ride the storm out and hold on the things you are thankful for...*hugs*

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:46:05 PM   
oceanwynds


Posts: 1044
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		Yes, I been depressed for major reasons too these past few months.
I not great at talking about my problems, so wont list them here. Things though did work out.

I didn't end up homeless.
Mom survived her surgery.
I survived mom's surgery
And the holidays are done.

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:47:29 PM   
everhope


Posts: 2179
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Status: offline 		i am now that the ResidentSadist read this thread to me over the phone...having good phone rates is the silver lining ...there is always a silver lining.

may we all find our bliss. 

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:48:34 PM   
SlaveIndigochild


Posts: 272
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

I am now that I read all this.   

Get well baby!

soz RS
PS you're a sadist be happy for me lol


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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:54:29 PM   
SlaveIndigochild


Posts: 272
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

Hugs to you Indigo... too bad you can't get an all expense paid 'girly girl' day! 

my new 'daughter' to the house did a girlie thing with me...as my niece had bought me blocks of henna from Lush. She did my hair and it looks so very red and soft and cool and i should be grateful. i mean i am. It was intimate. We got close.
But it's a feeling of inadequacy about my role in the world right now. i want to make a bigger difference than i feel i am making right now. my libido is zilch and although i refuse to get secondary anxiety over that, coz i know it will pass......what's a girl to do to make a bigger difference?


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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 12:59:07 PM   
lobodomslavery


Posts: 2477
Joined: 1/17/2008
Status: offline 		being depressed and jobless is worse i am. i hope this cheers you up knowing that there are always worse off people in the world than you
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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:00:23 PM   
SlaveIndigochild


Posts: 272
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: oceanwynds

Yes, I been depressed for major reasons too these past few months.
I not great at talking about my problems, so wont list them here. Things though did work out.

I didn't end up homeless.
Mom survived her surgery.
I survived mom's surgery
And the holidays are done.

i'm pleased about your Mom.
and i just blab about everything............


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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:03:27 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Ahhhh.... so there is more to this!  Honey... don't do that to yourself.  I know how you feel and how much you put into your service and Master and you are off balance from not being able to do what you normally do.  It is unsettling and hard to adjust to, but you know... about the time you find that you are adjusting to it... it is over.  Just hang in there!  Try not to beat yourself up!

I go through this in being sick and down sometimes and I just can't do what I normally do.  Not even close and it lingers on and on and on... Even though you know it will end... it lingers on and on and on...  You are tired of it.  Just remind yourself  you are tired and just don't have it in you.  It will pass... I wish I had something better to offer.

We could each smack your ass... cause I am not running naked through London's crowds of people shouting 'God save the queen!'

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:05:32 PM   
SlaveIndigochild


Posts: 272
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

being depressed and jobless is worse i am. i hope this cheers you up knowing that there are always worse off people in the world than you
kisses
kevin


no it doesn't cheer me up knowing anyone is worse off than me, but i know your intention so i thank you so much.
i've too much perhaps or rather it would do me good to experience having far less for a while as i would then appreciated what i have. i moan if the central heating gets turned down here and yet it's a freezing night in Gaza with wives and mothers feeling more cold than i ever have.
i dream sometimes about the anguish in the world. Would it help to turn off the News? and stay uninformed? i pride myself on learning a little something new everyday and have a thurst for learning....sometimes as they say 'tis folly to be wise.


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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:06:20 PM   
oceanwynds


Posts: 1044
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		thank you indigo
Oh i am pleased too, she has recovered like a trooper:).

Some people can talk about things and some cant which is good.
Hope you start to feel better soon. Do you have any cinnamon? You can put some in a pot of water and simmer. It is good for cheering up

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:15:50 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Welcome to my life. I live this struggle on a daily basis but everyday I learn to deal with it by reminding myself of the positives and to try and be as grateful as possible for what I do have. My spirituality also helps and keeping myself busy with either reading, work, hobbies, etc....



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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:16:03 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Well, OK... if we are going for sadistic emotional torture, please note that I was 3rd to post before the mods delete or move this thread out of General BDSM. 



quote:

ORIGINAL: SlaveIndigochild

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

I am now that I read all this.   

Get well baby!

soz RS
PS you're a sadist be happy for me lol



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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:21:58 PM   
gypsygrl


Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline
quote:

the dynamic i am living in doesn't feel politicized enough to be making a difference...


Why would you expect otherwise?  I'm trying to imagine a relationship dynamic politicized enough to make a difference and can't.  Perhaps my imagination is limited.  Or, maybe I misunderstood what you're getting at.  But, I'm thinking your expectations are a bit off hense your depression.

But, to answer the question posed at the end of your op, no I'm not depressed.

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RE: Depressed: rant - 1/4/2009 1:22:42 PM   
scarlethiney


Posts: 492
Joined: 8/22/2008
Status: offline 		I'm sorry your depressed.  I'm feeling a bit blue myself. I turn 50 in a couple of weeks and am feeling like I should have done more with my half a century of living than I have.
It doesn't depress me to be 50 just the idea that I didn't allow myself to do so many things I wanted to.  So I guess I'll just have to spend the next 50 getting busy and completing what I put off.

Hope you feel better. The idea that you worry about what you do SlaveIndigochild speaks volumes of who you are! 

scarlet


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