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Here's a question - 1/5/2006 4:37:54 PM   
BalletBob


Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		Here is a question, I was wondering about, and figured I would post it here. Lets say there is a Male Sub, who is looking for a Mistress, but due to lack of Mistresses in his area, he is thinking of looking for a Master. Would you tel this sub to wait for what he really wants, or settle for whatever is out there, since there are so much moreMasters around than Mistresses?

Curius BalletBob

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"I get my kicks above the Waistline, Sunshine"
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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 4:50:34 PM   
DarkGardens


Posts: 2
Joined: 11/4/2005
Status: offline 		That would depend if this male sub is bisexual. As I am sure you already know there is a sexual factor involved.
Or at least it is for U/us.
I do realize that there are many more Masters out there as to Mistresses but to settle for *second best* isn't always what you are really looking for.
Perhaps if there is a spouse, there could be some playtime there too?
Just a thought.

Good luck in your search,
Mistress Claudette
Darkgardens

(in reply to BalletBob)
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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 5:10:46 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		as hard as it is to find any Mistress's that is local or matches up nicely, i will stick to looking for them. not into guys...period...enough said.

(in reply to DarkGardens)
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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 7:20:52 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		I'd say it depends more on what you are looking for. If sexual contact isn't a concern or you are bisexual, then I say finding and getting experience can be its own reward.

Honestly how many people date one person that they then marry and this is the only person they ever have sex with? Honestly?!

All these posts I see looking for "THE ONE" make me think of this.

Get experience, get to know yourself, get involved, and get familiar with scening. I'm not saying to "settle" I'm saying that its all right to expand the parameters of what you are looking for. When we do this, we are sometimes very pleasantly surprised by what we find.

As far as I know, I'm not bisexual but I've had three wonderful female submissives that I trained and played with. Each one of them was a lovely woman whom I remained friends with for several years. I would never trade that time with them for time with a man. I learned so much by being willing to expand what I was looking for in terms of biological sex or gender (if you prefer).


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Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to BalletBob)
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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 7:55:05 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline 		It depends like it's already been said on what you seek and if said master is offering it.
I would think one or both of you would need to be bi, unless you're really showing up for no strings housecleaning. M

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a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to BalletBob)
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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 8:01:27 PM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline 		never settle for anything or anyone less than best for you

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MstrssPassion


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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 8:57:03 PM   
Misstoyou


Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

never settle for anything or anyone less than best for you


And do you still plan to look for a Mistress while you are serving a Dom?

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~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"


(in reply to MstrssPassion)
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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 9:09:23 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BalletBob

Here is a question, I was wondering about, and figured I would post it here. Lets say there is a Male Sub, who is looking for a Mistress, but due to lack of Mistresses in his area, he is thinking of looking for a Master. Would you tel this sub to wait for what he really wants, or settle for whatever is out there, since there are so much moreMasters around than Mistresses?

Curius BalletBob


I would never tell anyone to settle.

However, if he feels his service could be unbound by gender or sexual identity, then by all means he should explore all his options.


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to BalletBob)
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RE: Here's a question - 1/5/2006 10:57:59 PM   
veronicaofML


Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline 		ballet bob<<

i am not sure why you posted this.

every person makes his/hers decision...alone.
but if you are asking for support...
bob...ya do whatever ya think ya have-to.
just dont short change yourself...and resent it later.

be careful


_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"



(in reply to BalletBob)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 5:39:21 AM   
BeeQueen


Posts: 73
Joined: 9/29/2005
Status: offline 		hi there
reading through the answers, i miss one big advice.
everyone is all about *a mistress, a master*, how about u start searching friends and make friends, meet ppl, and participate in groups????? i think there is nothing more annoying than searching just *ANY* master/mistress out of *need*.
hey ok we all got our wishes and dreams that we want to fullfill..nothing wrong with that - but.....we r talking here about sexual pleasures and needs...and if u got that much of an itch, find a local professional and get ur scratch. if u into it couse u want a lifestyle and a lifepartner, i suggest u start makin friends first. a group of friends that know what ur goin through is more of an support than a brunch of online sites u desperatly click through a lot of profiles just to find anyone (and besides of that, a brunch of friends may also offer the possibility that u run into the *right one* for u)
Bee

(in reply to veronicaofML)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 6:20:28 AM   
Jasmyn


Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
Status: offline 		Bob I think it is a splendid idea for anyone having difficulty finding a ying for their yang to widen their search to include dominants of a gender that might not necessarily be their first choice. At the end of the day you are looking/seeking opportunities to be dressed and a het male dominant or tv/tg or even lesbian and gay doms may be able to help you out until such time as you and your ballet shoes are snapped up by a Mistress.

Remember too that not all people seeking submissives use online resources to do so, with a lot of people happy to just network within a group of likeminded friends. By making yourself available to a pansexual collection of dominants you may very well meet through them someone special to you that you would never have ment via online.

Also, consider the possibility of serving as a sub to a fem switch or a couple, or to a Mistress who seeks a number of subs and slaves rather than just 'the one'.

Good luck out there.

_____________________________

quote:

"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.


Visit My Website


(in reply to BalletBob)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 9:48:05 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		My favorite gin is Bombay Sapphire, when that is not available, I will switch to Vox Vodka, that doesn't mean I have abandoned My love or desire for Gin, it means, I have a desire or need that cannot at the moment be fulfilled but I have a desire for that nice feeling--this is a simplistic example, but when one has a need, a void if you will, it can make one crazy not to have it acknowledged--or a venue provided that one can be ones true self if only for a little while--( that feeling of peace)

So My answer would be--given your circumstances, I would look for some kind of venue to be able to be you--but before you start out, know very clearly what it is you can provide them and how they can help you in the interim (it could be as simple as serving their female subs)--Be very clear about hard limits as well----

I might also suggest some time reading female sub profiles, many of them are submissive to their Doms but do at times Dom others---as well as switches

after all a few moments of acceptance goes a long way to maintaining sanity.

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SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 11:59:30 AM   
EarthGoddess52


Posts: 70
Joined: 12/13/2005
Status: offline 		When you're looking for a Dominant, the most important factors should be whether or not They match your interests and/or limits as closely as possible. I don't really think sexual orientation should be that big an issue. It's about submission and serving, not about sex, although I know with male Doms, it is all too often about sexual gratification!
Soft limits may not be a deciding factor either as I believe the only way you can grow deeper in your submission, your surrender to Someone is by having your limits pushed. Hard limits should be respected but perhaps open to negotiation.
Interacting with the same sex, by the way, in my opinion does not make you gay or bisexual......it makes you submissive!!

theEarthGoddess

(in reply to DarkGardens)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 12:11:49 PM   
tasha_tart


Posts: 385
Joined: 2/20/2004
From: Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

Honestly how many people date one person that they then marry and this is the only person they ever have sex with? Honestly?!



You mean that isn't the way it works?

Hmmmmm...might explain a few things.

Tasha

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"Sex without love is an empty experience. But as empty experiences go, it's one of the better ones."...Woody Allen

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 1:07:54 PM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		To settle for seconds is like admitting defeat before the game is played...... It's like wanting to be the ballerina and having to settle for the face in the moon as a back-drop.....Tell your friend "No", Bob. Now, get on point and point him in the right direction.

Peace, Kevin


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Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 1:35:01 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		he's tried, but its slim pickens for Dominas in his area---we don't tend to gravitate to Atlantic City.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 5:54:20 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline 		Too bad....AC has a great adult club called Caligula's Temple. It's more "anything goes" themed than BDSM, but that's close enough for me! They also encourage swinging, so I believe sex is even permitted there. I'm on their mailing list and plan to go there one of these days.

chymes

(in reply to MHOO314)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 6:20:42 PM   
BalletBob


Posts: 1645
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		Thanks all for the advice, and I will stick with my search for a Mistress.

And BeeQueen, I would love to chat of become friends with diferent people and Mistress, but ir seems that most won't even take e-mail from you if you can't locate, or if your married, so I can't become friends first, like I would prefer.

Thanks again All, and take care...and ALways have FUN !

BalletBob

_____________________________

"I get my kicks above the Waistline, Sunshine"

(in reply to BeeQueen)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 7:51:59 PM   
TeeGO


Posts: 451
Joined: 12/11/2005
Status: offline 		I have a question running along these line. Although this is the wrong forum for it, it's the right discussion. I check profiles of nearly everybody just because it's fun. One thing I don't get is straight male Doms seeking sub/sub couples.

Can anybody shed some light on that?

(in reply to BalletBob)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Here's a question - 1/6/2006 8:05:27 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Thanks all for the advice, and I will stick with my search for a Mistress.
I didn't even realize you were married and unable to relocate... Given those circumstances, and the probability that you're not looking for a sexual relationship, all I would imagine you need is someone with whom your kinks match, male or female; is that what you were considering/asking about? M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to BalletBob)
Profile   Post #: 20
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