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RE: curious - 1/12/2009 10:41:16 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		See this is one of the questions that I always look at profiles and I will look at yours but before I do I will simply ask the question, My view on poly is that its right for some and not for others. Personally its something I do identify with but BUT most of the messages I get from couples are almost totally sexual and always imply the current relationships significance. Now this is fine but when i get messages that simply outline what someone else wants I dont feel very inspired. Also I have had a poly relationship where the focus on the primary relationship was in fact detrimental to me.

Right post reading your profile its another We want we want type of thing, the thing is that thats limiting where is your personality? its just an ad.

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to polycouple100)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 10:51:35 AM   
bamagirl4u


Posts: 151
Joined: 12/25/2008
Status: offline 		I am good friends with a poly couple that live pretty close to me.  I admit to being very sexually attracted to him, but I am not bi.  We haven't discussed the bi part too much as we are just good friends atm.  But, I do love his wife too.  If I were to enter into a relationship with Him, I could be the beta very easily.  I just don't think he would go for the not being bi...so...for now...we remain just really good friends.  So, the long way around the block is this...You can find what you seek, if you take the time to really search.  And please...NO form letters!!  Good luck.

_____________________________

~Don't settle for the One you can live with~~Wait for the One you can't live without.~
~To thine own self be true~~no compromise.~

(in reply to colouredin)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 11:05:41 AM   
MasterSim


Posts: 10
Joined: 5/26/2006
Status: offline 		I shall not become Freud and even seek to delve into the childhood experiences, though interesting a lot of them can be.

(in reply to kittinSol)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 11:15:50 AM   
MasterSim


Posts: 10
Joined: 5/26/2006
Status: offline 		All things are not for all people, even within the world of bdsm, one must do what one feels is good for themselves. one must always turn her attention to look within her own heart as she charts the waters in search of that which shall complete her. For some poly is a good fit and others it is not, for if one is not Alpha and one has the personality of Alpha then it is extremely hard to be Beta. That does not mean that the servant can not and shall not be a good servant, it simply means that if allowed to serve within the scope of her comfort zone shall excel at being pleasing to her Master. The sexual side of all this can often be blown totally out of porportion. If all it is to us is sex then what takes place when the sexual interest begans to peak and then decline. Does everything that one spends years in building become destroyed because sex is no longer there? A relationship, a good relationship is still a relationship, whether it is vanilla or D/s if it is what those involve want then they spend time laying a foundation, they spend time communicating their wants, their needs, their desires, their expectations of one another, for is it not written that a house without a foundation shall not withstand the rains and winds? That is of a truth and so too a relationship that lacks foundation shall not within the rains and the winds of time. For it shall be shallow and meaningless, for it would be better if from the beginning that they were but two ships that passed within the night

(in reply to colouredin)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 11:17:41 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSim
Submission is a state of existence that one is born into the world with as part of his/her genetic marker.

What part of the human genome is it located in?  It's ok if you use big biochemistry words in your response, because I understand them.

Please understand that if you are not able to back up rash statements, you will look like a poser who thinks he can get away with posting BS because the internet is "anonymous."  The reality, of course, is that the internet is less anonymous than people think... and pompous pontification can bite you in the ass.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to MasterSim)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 11:20:05 AM   
MasterSim


Posts: 10
Joined: 5/26/2006
Status: offline 		I would be say this, Poly does not mean that one must be bi. In the 60's and early 70's America was faced with the ear of Free Love, the flower children so to speak, they believed in peace and in love rather than war and death. They build communes, which were nothing more than poly communities in which they lived, they shared and they loved?  Sexual preference should never define whether one can live within a poly relationship

(in reply to bamagirl4u)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 11:47:17 AM   
MasterSim


Posts: 10
Joined: 5/26/2006
Status: offline 		This not about pompous pontification, it is about the fact that person can not be made into something that they are not, one can pretend, one can try to ascend to a higher plateau in life, but yet if their true desire is be no more than what they are then the fact that they seek to please another by being what that person wants them to be shall ultimately cause them to fail because their heart is not there. It is not about chemistry class, breaking down the chromosones, dissecting x and y. But yet, if you are certain that a person who was not born with the heart of submission can be made to be submissive, then i would ask that you explain to me why then slaves who lack the slave heart begin to crave freedom and rebel, or the prisoner who refuses to be broken and forced to obey the powers that be?

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 12:05:57 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		So, polycouple100?  I'd suggest -- as other posters have already said in other words -- that you approach each woman as an individual.  Roles come later.

MasterSim's posts contain several good examples of what not to do.  I'll just point out that he states that subs or slaves are inferior to dominants or masters; and he equates having a "slave heart" with a prisoner (in an actual prison) submitting (by force) to the powers that be.  If the two of you are looking for someone who would submit to you with consent, you need to inspire her respect, affection, and/or love.  Don't rely on some pseudoscientific claptrap about the primal laws of human existence since the dawn of time.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to MasterSim)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 12:58:25 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		To quickly answer your question from one submissive's point of view:

1) I have no interest in poly
2) I would not involve myself with a couple who is married because I wouldn't want to be involved in drama (legal or otherwise) if there were a separation/divorce that resulted from being part of a poly situation with them.


_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to polycouple100)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 1:54:18 PM   
BondageBarbieX


Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline 		I do not do poly it brings drama and is bad for a relationship

(in reply to polycouple100)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 4:29:01 PM   
Cookiedom


Posts: 5
Joined: 8/3/2008
Status: offline 		Im not sub but DONT do it - One is more than enough trouble, two would be a nightmare lol

(in reply to kittinSol)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 4:33:22 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BondageBarbieX

I do not do poly it brings drama and is bad for a relationship


For your relationship, perhaps.  This is not true of ALL relationships.

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to BondageBarbieX)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 4:46:39 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: polycouple100

my wife and I and are seeking a poly live in we have sent out a lot of invitations to members here to at least engage in discussion about the idea. with little response is the idea of poly that far off base as to not attract any takers..

what are the views of some of the submissives here on poly


As a submissive, I embrace poly relationships with much more enthusiasm and will turn my back on a monogamous one. Creating a poly family can be difficult and poses some unique twists which makes it interesting and unique. Yet when you strip away the glitz and and hyperbole, it isn't that much different then creating a relationship with one partner. You still need clear communication among all people involved and each person's needs and expectations need to be made known. How the finer details are done is solely up to the people in that relationship.


_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to polycouple100)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: curious - 1/12/2009 4:48:42 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSim

All things are not for all people, even within the world of bdsm, one must do what one feels is good for themselves. one must always turn her attention to look within her own heart as she charts the waters in search of that which shall complete her. For some poly is a good fit and others it is not, for if one is not Alpha and one has the personality of Alpha then it is extremely hard to be Beta. That does not mean that the servant can not and shall not be a good servant, it simply means that if allowed to serve within the scope of her comfort zone shall excel at being pleasing to her Master. The sexual side of all this can often be blown totally out of porportion. If all it is to us is sex then what takes place when the sexual interest begans to peak and then decline. Does everything that one spends years in building become destroyed because sex is no longer there? A relationship, a good relationship is still a relationship, whether it is vanilla or D/s if it is what those involve want then they spend time laying a foundation, they spend time communicating their wants, their needs, their desires, their expectations of one another, for is it not written that a house without a foundation shall not withstand the rains and winds? That is of a truth and so too a relationship that lacks foundation shall not within the rains and the winds of time. For it shall be shallow and meaningless, for it would be better if from the beginning that they were but two ships that passed within the night


A most interesting way of stating  things yet well said!


_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to MasterSim)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: curious - 1/13/2009 6:05:04 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cookiedom

Im not sub but DONT do it - One is more than enough trouble, two would be a nightmare lol


Awww poor Cookie, us subs are way too much for you arent we *pats head*

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to Cookiedom)
Profile   Post #: 35
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