RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (Full Version)

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CatdeMedici -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 2:33:09 PM)

One moment of attemped humiliation would have his butt on the train--unacceptable behavior.



CalifChick -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 2:57:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight
I am just asking a question would you stay in the relationship and would you still respect him for dis respecting you!!!!


Your question is invalid, as it assumes a series of events that most people here would not choose.  It is like saying, if you cracked open your dom's head, and you took him to the hospital, would you say he got hit by a hit & run driver or would you give a false name at the hospital since you don't have insurance.

Most people would say, "I would never hit my dom"... but that doesn't answer your question.

I would certainly address his behavior and what he was saying to me, but going "tit for tat" on it solves nothing.  It certainly isn't a mature nor an effective means of working out problems.


Cali



graceadieu -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 3:01:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

No you’re not being played with. Just asking how you would react towards your dom, if you tried to degrade you was the question and you turned the tables on him. You refused to let him have the power over you. Lets face facts some doms like to humiliate their subbie/slaves.


If he tried to degrade me in a way that was genuinely causing me emotional harm, I'd talk to him about it like a mature adult and try to resolve the issue (why did he say those things? why couldn't I give over that power? what are our boundries? etc) and preserve the relationship.

But it sounds like you've both totally lost respect for each other at this point, so I doubt you can salvage things.



littlewonder -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 3:30:19 PM)

I would not return. It would be the end of the relationship.

I don't try to turn tables, I don't rebel, I don't fight back. If I did then I would be the one in control and that holds no interest for me whatsoever. If I can easily manipulate him then we're obviously incompatible and I would think that maybe he should think of switching or changing roles.



akisha -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 3:32:08 PM)

~FR~
Wow, obviously someone was left home alone today and decided to play on the puter [sm=AttentionWhore.gif][sm=Groaner.gif][sm=jerry.gif]

If this is even close to being true then you both need to grow up and stop acting like 10 yr olds.



bamagirl4u -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 4:36:41 PM)

If humiliation was not part of our agreement, I can see where your anger got the best of you.  I don't think I could look at him the same though, but that is just me.  My former Dom cried when I left him.  But it was because he was caught in his lies and could not think of another one fast enough to pacify me.  When the end finally came, it was not pretty for either of us.  I loved him with all my heart and soul~~the betrayal though was enough to let it go.  It depends on how much you love him to start with whether or not you continue.  I guess I would want to know "what" made him actually cry.  I don't think a Dom that is capable of shedding tears is any less a Dom, so it is hard to say...it all depends on the situation.  Sorry, I don't think I was much help at all...Good luck to you..



MasterTslave -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 5:51:59 PM)

I would say that a "true" slave/sub would not "turn the tables"...I would say that was more the work of a "switch"...JMO.
Master T has cried before...not during our training or play....but when he has been really upset...it is human and only a jack ass refuses to cry ever...think ass of the world-they don't cry.



beargonewild -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 5:59:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

Some doms like to humiliate their subbie/slaves, and make them cry. I had an experienced with a dom where as when he started to try to put me down and I rebelled and turned the tables on the dom, he started to cry. So tell me subbies/slaves how would you handle this matter. Could you still respect your dom?  How would this reflect on your relationship?



That situation would not have happened for me to handle. If the humiliation was not agreed upon then the adult thing for me to do is sit and have an adult to adult conversation to prevent that happening again.

I'd be upset at my dom yet I would lose some self respect for myself because I know better than to use immature tactics to get back on him for breaking his word.



DarkSteven -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 6:11:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterTslave
...it is human and only a jack ass refuses to cry ever...think ass of the world-they don't cry.


I'm going to disagree with you.  I cannot cry.  I have tried in order to get the release... but the tears are just stoppered within me.



Huntertn -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 6:17:02 PM)

Yep...the only time I cry is for "old Yellar"Now thats a tear jerker....but cry over something my sub said..In a Pigs eye!!! But I did cry when my Dad died june24th at 5 am, and when I recieved the call that my grandmother died 3 days befor x-mas this year so I guess I'm normal enough



DavanKael -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 6:24:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterTslave

I would say that a "true" slave/sub would not "turn the tables"...I would say that was more the work of a "switch"...JMO.
Master T has cried before...not during our training or play....but when he has been really upset...it is human and only a jack ass refuses to cry ever...think ass of the world-they don't cry.


Really, "the work of a switch"; really?!  Switch does not equal someone who tops from the bottom, you are in error. 
  Davan



DesFIP -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 7:13:24 PM)

Obviously you do not know how to communicate in a low key manner. Me? I wouldn't be in a relationship where either party felt that nonconsensual abuse was acceptable. I hope he decided quickly that you are a toxic person, and has since recovered.

We honor and respect each other. That includes times when I'm over his knee, screeching in pain. At no time do I ever need to defend myself from him nor attack him to prevent myself being open and vulnerable.



ALAstella -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 7:33:42 PM)

Respect is an integral part of friendships, and an even more integral part of relationships. Without it both are nothing more than an illusion.



FetishRose -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 9:48:49 PM)

I am a fighter; I am a bitch; I am a smartass.
I have a terrible habit of snapping back with comments when I am in a snotty mood.
However...I realize that this is my failing as a submissive, and I work on it.
If I allowed myself to turn the tables that bad, I wouldn't be able to call myself a submissive, and I would be terribly ashamed of my actions.  I may not always agree with a dom, but if I have chosen to be theirs, I respect them too much to do that.
If they don't own me, nothing anyone could say would humiliate me bad enough to cause that reaction.  I'd just tell them to step off and walk away.



NuevaVida -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/13/2009 11:33:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight
I am just asking a question would you stay in the relationship and would you still respect him for dis respecting you!!!!


Your question is invalid, as it assumes a series of events that most people here would not choose.  It is like saying, if you cracked open your dom's head, and you took him to the hospital, would you say he got hit by a hit & run driver or would you give a false name at the hospital since you don't have insurance.

Most people would say, "I would never hit my dom"... but that doesn't answer your question.

I would certainly address his behavior and what he was saying to me, but going "tit for tat" on it solves nothing.  It certainly isn't a mature nor an effective means of working out problems.


Cali



Bingo, to both points.



MRandme -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/14/2009 4:29:52 AM)

If i said *anything* to my Master that made Him feel hurt, especially if it moved him to tears -- i would feel horrible and i would hope that He would punish me for my lack of respect. Humiliation is not part of our dynamic, on either side. Even when i am unhappy about something, i just do not express myself in nasty ways, always with the understanding that my respect for Him must show.



sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/14/2009 4:49:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

I am just asking a question would you stay in the relationship and would you still respect him for dis respecting you!!!!

it would depend on your definition on what "disrepecting "means to you since it would mean something totally different to me.  i define disrespect as anyone who's not Daddy calling me the n-word (or any other racial slur) to bitch, cunt etc etc.

on the flipside, Daddy does call me His bitch, His cunt, His slut etc etc - now that's not disrespect to me because He uses those words as terms of endearment.  see the difference.

oh btw He would never use any racial slur to humiliate me ...He has that much respect and love for me.



ExKat -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/14/2009 4:58:54 AM)

  I have a little bit of suspicion that the initial "disrespect" on the part of the dom may have been greatly exaggerated. I don't consider humiliation that takes place outside of the bedroom to be anything even vaguely related to "humiliation play". If he called me a slut in an argument, it'd be an entirely different beast than if he called me that to "humiliate" me.

   I believe any relationship where the parties involved feel the need to hurt each other to the point of tears is one that is seriously damaged....I don't know your dom, but I haven't met very many men who were overly emotional...I imagine your "turning-the-tables" tirade of anger and abuse probably lasted for some time. At this point, you've entirely lost any respect you ever had for him (and it must not have been much).

    If I had behaved so badly as to make someone cry, I would have to step out of that relationship until I got my own volatile emotions under control...someone who lashes out that badly for a minor matter is not fit to be in a relationship. If my dominant had done something that made me feel so insecure that I felt the need to lash out that badly, I imagine that I would leave him. If I had seen my dominant cry for any reason, it would have no difference to the respect I felt for him: more likely, seeing the depth of emotions he felt for me would touch me deeply.



sirsholly -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/14/2009 5:06:13 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

He is my BITCH


birds of a feather........[8|]



lally3 -> RE: Humiliating you dom untill he cries (1/14/2009 5:47:43 AM)

men are allowed to cry (i think - checks the rule book) yep, says it right there!  'men are allowed emotions too', seems fair enough to me.

i spose tho, that if i humiliated my man i would expect some repurchusions (once he'd blown his nose and dabbed his eyes dry).  largely because i would feel so bloody awful id need to pay for it in some large way or id beat myself up forever!

i dont like making people miserable, not how im wired atall - not to be overly annoying about this, but have you thought that maybe youre a swtich (if you enjoy humiliating your man?) - just a thought.



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