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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 7:46:05 PM   
DominaSmartass


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From: This month? Maryland
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[/quote]

Thanks... I've only made 5 post and you're the second person to use the word "wanker" in a reply. I don't think you people mean it the same way regular non bdsm people mean it. lol. Maybe one day someone will tell me what a bdsm wanker is. :-O

[/quote]

I am pretty sure they are using it in the same way as others. Wanker = masturbater, so basically these guys that are using your numerous attractive photos to jerk off. All the better if you wrote them back a personal letter.

I've been in your place, dominant at a young age, and my best advice is to remember that when dealing with men (boys really) in your age range, you will likely be very disappointed. Not that I had that much luck with older ones either, to be honest, they could be just as flakey and insincere. Getting involved in local groups may prove a lot more successful than meeting people online because at least you know that they aren't afraid to step out from behind the computer. Sadly, I can say it doesn't get better till you're a bit older. I don't know any very successful (relationship-wise) dominant women between 20-25. Most the females I know in my own age range are either submissive or pro-doms...I'm actually having a hard time thinking of a single dominant woman my own age (just about 25.)

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 8:03:31 PM   
Loliita


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quote:

I don't know any very successful (relationship-wise) dominant women between 20-25. Most the females I know in my own age range are either submissive or pro-doms...I'm actually having a hard time thinking of a single dominant woman my own age (just about 25.)


How do you define successful relationships? Only the last relationship ends in marriage, right? That doesn't make the earlier ones a failure.
I have been a dominant female my entire life (although not always kinky) and I've had a couple of successful semi D/s relationships, at least in the way I define successful and D/s. Even though my D/s relationships were not as kinky or as structured as the D/s relationships in the collarme world, they were never-the-less D/s relationships. The guys did what I told them to do when and where I told them. I did get kinky with a couple.

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 8:17:53 PM   
E2Sweet


Posts: 649
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loliita

...How do you define successful relationships? Only the last relationship ends in marriage, right?...


Hmm, in my view, swap the word marriage with happiness and I think you'll speak to the hearts of an even greater number of readers here... It is, after all, an alternative lifestyle kind of website. In that, we do get to bend the societal rules a bit...

Edited cause my first try came off kinda 'uppity'...


< Message edited by E2Sweet -- 1/15/2009 8:37:23 PM >

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 8:54:46 PM   
DominaSmartass


Posts: 961
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loliita

quote:

I don't know any very successful (relationship-wise) dominant women between 20-25. Most the females I know in my own age range are either submissive or pro-doms...I'm actually having a hard time thinking of a single dominant woman my own age (just about 25.)


How do you define successful relationships? Only the last relationship ends in marriage, right? That doesn't make the earlier ones a failure.
I have been a dominant female my entire life (although not always kinky) and I've had a couple of successful semi D/s relationships, at least in the way I define successful and D/s. Even though my D/s relationships were not as kinky or as structured as the D/s relationships in the collarme world, they were never-the-less D/s relationships. The guys did what I told them to do when and where I told them. I did get kinky with a couple.


More power to you. I'm just saying that I haven't come across many, myself included. And no, I'm the last one to say a successful relationship ends in marriage and all others are not successful. By successful I mean...lasting longer than a few months, actually accomplishing the D/s objective rather than the entire relationship spent talking about it and not doing it, not ending with the sub going "poof", consisting of honesty, communication, and overall being more functional than dysfunctional. I wasn't trying to say you have never had a successful relationship or won't till you're older, just that from everything I've experienced personally and witnessed in friends, dominant females of the teenage through mid-twenties variety don't have as much luck as the ones in their 30s, 40s, and beyond. I've experienced a lot of age bias (how could I possibly know anything being so young?) as well as a lot of older subs fetishizing my youth and acting as though the only reason I'm appealing to them is because I'm young and dominant and nothing else.

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“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

(in reply to Loliita)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:01:27 PM   
DominaSmartass


Posts: 961
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From: This month? Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming
 
And FYI: we all say "jerking off" or "jacking off" too. Those are old expressions. But I've never heard of just "Jack" being used as a derogatory term. "Jerk", or "jack-off" yes, of course but not just plain "Jack". The term "wanker" seems to be (at least I gather from its use here on CM) more specifically geared to describe someone who masturbates while using a computer.



Wanker is British in origin, at least that's always been my context in using it. I think I first heard it used in the film "Trainspotting" and picked it up back then. It just sounds better than other words, which is why I think it's thrown around a lot here.

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“These S&M people ... they are bossy! There’s also a creepy connection between leather sex, ‘Star Trek’ and the Renaissance Faire.”

- Comedian Margaret Cho

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:03:54 PM   
Loliita


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Joined: 1/15/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaSmartass

By successful I mean...lasting longer than a few months, actually accomplishing the D/s objective rather than the entire relationship spent talking about it and not doing it, not ending with the sub going "poof", .....


Subs go Poof? LMAO ! ha ha ha ha ha

I never considered D/s to be an objective before. I've never considered there to be a line in my relationships between D/s and not D/s. I have always been the dominant one and I don't enter into relationships where I am not the dominant one. I just didn't know there was an actual lifestyle devoted to D/s until not too long ago. The guys I've dated have always done what I told them to do from the first date on. I just attract that type of guy.



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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:17:30 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline 		Oh. I see, thanks. In that film (or anyone from the UK please feel free to chime in about how it is used there):
Is it meant to be specific to jerking off to the computer, or is it just in reference to any kind of masturbation, or is it used a derogatory term in the way the OP says she calls someone a "jack"?

I am very curious. I like wankers, so long as they just read my journal and don't ever actually message me personally. (Wankers, scurry away now and read my journal but don't Cmail me.)

*end of threadjack, apologies to the OP*

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:24:01 PM   
Loliita


Posts: 69
Joined: 1/15/2009
Status: offline 		^No problems dreamerdraming. I think I'm the one who started the "wanker thread jacking anyway." Funny, to me and those I know, "Jacking" means what wanker means on this forum. To me it looks like you apologized for jacking or wanking off in my thread. ha ha ha

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:32:21 PM   
ALAstella


Posts: 253
Joined: 12/3/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

Oh. I see, thanks. In that film (or anyone from the UK please feel free to chime in about how it is used there):
Is it meant to be specific to jerking off to the computer, or is it just in reference to any kind of masturbation, or is it used a derogatory term in the way the OP says she calls someone a "jack"?



It can be all three and can be used interchangeably with 'tosser', which also means wanker.

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:32:22 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline 		LOL!

So...hard...2...type...with...one...hand....

*taking another look at Dnomyar's pic*



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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:36:11 PM   
Loliita


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Joined: 1/15/2009
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quote:



It can be all three and can be used interchangeably with 'tosser', which also means wanker.


Oh great so my thread is now being wanked, jacked, AND tossed. lol :-O

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Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 9:39:05 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline 		Will it be respected in the morning?

;o)

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 11:45:09 PM   
E2Sweet


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Joined: 7/8/2008
From: TopLeftCornerOf, OH, USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

Will it be respected in the morning?

;o)


..and is it using protection?

...I think at this point it may also need a safeword...


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"If it doesn't make you smile then chances are you're not doing it right."

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 11:48:05 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		doesnt RESPECT have to be EARNED?

*snort*

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 11:52:17 PM   
Loliita


Posts: 69
Joined: 1/15/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

doesnt RESPECT have to be EARNED?

*snort*


This thread is not respecting anyone unless they cuddle. :-O

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/15/2009 11:58:39 PM   
E2Sweet


Posts: 649
Joined: 7/8/2008
From: TopLeftCornerOf, OH, USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Loliita

This thread is not respecting anyone unless they cuddle. :-O


Oh, now you've done it.. You've gone and said the "C" word!


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E2Sweet™
"If it doesn't make you smile then chances are you're not doing it right."

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Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/16/2009 12:07:11 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		I'm all up for cuddling!!

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polysnortatious
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CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/16/2009 3:57:38 AM   
beeble


Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
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quote:

dreamerdreaming wrote:
Oh. I see, thanks. In that film (or anyone from the UK please feel free to chime in about how it is used there):
Is it meant to be specific to jerking off to the computer, or is it just in reference to any kind of masturbation, or is it used a derogatory term in the way the OP says she calls someone a "jack"?

OK.

To `wank' is to masturbate.  So, literally, a wanker is somebody who masturbates a lot, or who is somehow defined or characterized by their masturbation.  The use of the term `wanker' here on CM usually denotes somebody whose only interest in BDSM is as fodder for his masturbatory fantasies, somebody who may well be wanking while looking at pretty Dommes' profiles.

The usual British meaning of the term `wanker' is figurative.  A wanker is just a generally contemptible person, a moron, a jerk.  (`Jerk' is, itself, a figurative use.)  If a British person, in ordinary life, points and says, `Look at that wanker over there', they're more likely to be pointing at somebody doing something stupid in their car or making a fool of themself, than pointing at somebody who's masturbating.  The use in Trainspotting is this figurative use.

beeble.


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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/16/2009 4:40:11 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		For god's sake, beeble, how many dictionaries do you own? 

Anyway, shall I explain the difference in usage of the word "poof" this side of the Atlantic, or shall you?

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RE: Are these guys for real? - 1/16/2009 4:42:15 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

I'm all up for cuddling!!


Disgusting.  Almost as bad as kissing.  I hope you don't intend to bring either of those depraved habits over here with you, GT. 

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Profile   Post #: 60
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