|
Amaros -> RE: What's your reason for being into D/s, M/s, D/D, and BDSM? (1/17/2009 9:42:05 AM)
|
I suppose it comes from a lot of directions- at my age, I've seen a lot of social change: in the late Sixties and Seventies, the sexual revolution was in full swing, experimentation the norm. Thirty years later, the AIDS epidemic, women entering the labor market, conservative backlash, the increasingly ubiquitous media, and attempts to control it have all taken their toll on the sort to openness that prevailed in the Seventies, and attitudes towards sexuality have become a minefield in many ways, swinging first one way, then the other.
Personally, I had fantasies from a very early age that were out of "the norm" even in those sexually permissive times, and I've always been struck by the extreme attitudes towards sex in this culture, ranging from exuberant absence of inhibition to erotophobia bordering on social paralysis.
Anyway, to "fit in" I went the whole Vanilla route, which really only succeeded in making me feel more alienated and trapped.
Part of the problem being that I really had no idea that there actually was a community of people who felt the same - so while I'm not really a joiner, in the sense of sublimating my needs to a group, I cannot see the existence of others with whom I can share my thought and desires with who aren't going to go out their way to misunderstand them, as anything but a good thing - we all need some sort of social acceptance, we are a social species.
BDSM is a subculture where I can be myself, where others share my obsessions, even if finding the one that shares my particular obsessions is not always easy - it's all good however, and what is important to me is the willingness to explore, to stop pretending and just experience; you just don't find that very often in the Vanilla matrix.
|
|
|
|
