RE: Opinions

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Opinions

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Opinions

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Opinions - 1/10/2006 7:23:53 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sudja

Do you really expect 100% submission to your wishes from somebody you are just getting to know?

sudja

What I expect is not "100% submission" in the beginning; far from it. But I DO expect obedience and RESPECT, and will NOT put up with any manipulative behavior or half-hearted attempts in serving me.

Likewise, I find it funny how submissives expect me to be "100%" accepting of their claims of a slave's loyalty and love. Those who do serve me know their vocabularly quite well, and the terms are not so easily thrown around.

(in reply to sudja)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Opinions - 1/10/2006 7:36:29 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

What I expect is not "100% submission" in the beginning; far from it. But I DO expect obedience and RESPECT, and will NOT put up with any manipulative behavior or half-hearted attempts in serving me.

While I understand and completely agree with the respect factor, I do have to wonder why you would expect obedience from someone who you do not own, have control over or a commitment with. I can most certainly show the utmost respect for a perspective dominant without having to obey his commands, and quite honestly I would be put off by a dominant who expected my obedience BEFORE there was any type of relationship. In the case of the OP, I wonder if it would have been acceptable if the sub in question had responded by saying that at the point of commitment she would have been willing to begin growing out her hair.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to amayos)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Opinions - 1/10/2006 7:43:11 AM

caitlyn

Posts: 3473
Joined: 12/22/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos
What I expect is not "100% submission" in the beginning; far from it. But I DO expect obedience and RESPECT, and will NOT put up with any manipulative behavior or half-hearted attempts in serving me.

Virtually anything can be spun as manipulative behavior, if you choose to do so. An error in judgement can be seen as manipulative, or as half hearted.

No offense intended, but I don't think any of us is really smart enough to completely divine the motives and objectives of another person.

(in reply to amayos)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Opinions - 1/10/2006 7:52:50 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NakedOnMyChain

I hope that works out for you. That attitude makes me want to kick people, but if it works for you, it works for you.

Personally, I wouldn't even consider accepting a top that made me cut my hair. (It's a religious/spiritual thing, and definitely a hard limit.) Aside from that, it generally seems a bit shallow. Preferences should be simply that: preferences. Most relationships, even in the lifestyle, tend to have at least minute elements of give and take on each side. Unless all concerned parties know exactly what they're getting into some power exchange should occur and some compromises should be made. In the end though, we all have to call our own games.

(Not picking on you specifically amayos. You simply wrote the inevitable post that I knew would happen as soon as I read the original post.)

My bad for being so unoriginal, I guess.

You speak of what is and isn't shallow in a dominant male's wishes. This is in fact a perfect example of why I'm not looking for "bottoms", as I am not a "top".

This is neither here nor there, but my methods DO in fact work for me. If they didn't, why would I embrace them so? I seek acolytes, not self-oriented marriage-minded brat bottoms with raging little pet egos.

(in reply to NakedOnMyChain)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: Opinions - 1/10/2006 9:32:34 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

While I understand and completely agree with the respect factor, I do have to wonder why you would expect obedience from someone who you do not own, have control over or a commitment with.

...Because I'm silly that way.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
I can most certainly show the utmost respect for a perspective dominant without having to obey his commands, and quite honestly I would be put off by a dominant who expected my obedience BEFORE there was any type of relationship.

Relationship, commitment—I'm uncertain of how YOU are using these terms, but I will say there is a process of getting to know a prospective slave prior to expecting full, fat-free obedience, of course. The crux of it all is this: if you approach me after having read any one of my placed profiles, I expect you to be made of relatively stern and serious stuff, endowed with a certain knowledge of forethought about who I am and what I expect. If instead you cannot glean this from what I have written and choose to start spitting out the usual kinkster mantras, a grievous ERROR has been made.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: Opinions - 1/10/2006 9:40:13 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn

Virtually anything can be spun as manipulative behavior, if you choose to do so. An error in judgement can be seen as manipulative, or as half hearted.

Spin what you wish. Error of judgment—yes, that applies overall.

quote:

ORIGINAL: caitlyn
No offense intended, but I don't think any of us is really smart enough to completely divine the motives and objectives of another person.

...Unless of course they clearly state them in any given profile. (No offense taken, btw).

< Message edited by amayos -- 1/10/2006 9:41:35 AM >

(in reply to caitlyn)

Profile

Post #: 46