RE: New Boys (Full Version)

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thetammyjo -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 8:35:50 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: UPSG

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

Anyone not of the elites of any society has routinely been used by those in power. That seems to be part of the human equation, fair or not.

Within those classes though women, on average, were given less legal, social, and economic power so in that sense yes women as a group have been more oppressed than men.


By-and-large I would agree with you. I think on one hand, given the complexity of life, one can risk over-generalizing about that. I think it would be kind of like me asserting Black people have been more oppressed than white people throughout the sum of world history. That's a big leap of assumption.

Supposedly - and this is what scholars and historians claim for whatever it's worth (you know they are prone to change their minds) - men and women were relatively equal (egalitarian society) in "tribal" level societies (hunters and gathers basically). But from the chiefdom level that declined a bit, and at the "civilization" level males gained almost total power.

My personal opinion, from my own personal reading, is that privilege has historically had more to do with one's socio-economic class than their sex. I'm sure this is not a premises that would be popular with feminist ideology or literature but it is my opinion.

Putting aside Athens or the Republic of Venice etc... democracy (and the other two were never pure democracies) is relatively new to human civilizations. Even in the United States not all White men (let alone Blacks or Indians) could vote originally. This came to change and it took longer for women to win suffrage. However, a woman having a "good" husband was arguably no worse than a male sub or slave having a "good" mistress.



See, this is actually I a subject I do study professionally.

I'll point out that within your above examples you lists ways that women have been given less value in societies, economic systems and legal systems. The very fact that democracy gave legal rights to some men but no women demonstrates that in the USA -- other nations have difference experiences.

You can't honestly compared Blacks to women. Blacks and Whites are not categories which cross all cultures and all time period -- men and women are such categories just as age categories are.

That said, throughout history a woman within the highest levels of her society, you are correct that this was a "class" thing if you expand that definition, would have more social and economic power than a man from the lower classes. Legal rights varied widely. I cannot think of more than a handful of cultures where within a class the man and woman had equal value.

Individual families and subcultures might value other criteria more than biological sex but that has not been common.

Finding these counter examples is very important for it demonstrates that human beings are varied but these example do not counter general social, political, economic, and other trends. They offer proof that none of this is natural but merely cultural and as such things can be changed -- for positive or negative.

Can someone tell me again how this entire discussion turned from the OP? I'm seeing how it deals with his concerns or experiences.




thetammyjo -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 8:43:43 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I suggest you study some more, USPG...  Black culture may indeed be a matriarchy---much of that is due to the lack of presence of black men.  

Enjoy your viewpoint.


Matriarchy would imply a fully social system with women having the bulk of power and authority. I have yet to see that in any society and I've looked as I've studied things through the years professionally. Matrilineal, yes, most certainly, matrilocal, from time to time this is true but matriarchal... nope haven't seen that.

Matrilineal = tracing descent through the maternal line

Matrilocal = having resident with the wife's family or clan

Matriarchy = rule of women in society -- often now commonly misused to just refer to an individual household having the wife or mother as the head because it is so unheard of to be a true parallel to patriarchy




Lockit -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 9:19:41 AM)

I've been watching some great shows on cable... I just don't get to the program at the start and don't get all the fact's even if I could remember them.  But there was a tribe with very little outside contact where the women picked a husband, he came to live with her... and any um's were basically raised by the woman's family and daddy had more of a role that we would consider like the uncle.  He was like a visitor to the woman's family household.  There was another tribe where the women could have multiple husbands.  I don't know who ran what... but I found these things to be interesting. lol




LadyHibiscus -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 2:01:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I suggest you study some more, USPG...  Black culture may indeed be a matriarchy---much of that is due to the lack of presence of black men.  

Enjoy your viewpoint.


Matriarchy would imply a fully social system with women having the bulk of power and authority. I have yet to see that in any society and I've looked as I've studied things through the years professionally. Matrilineal, yes, most certainly, matrilocal, from time to time this is true but matriarchal... nope haven't seen that.

Matrilineal = tracing descent through the maternal line

Matrilocal = having resident with the wife's family or clan

Matriarchy = rule of women in society -- often now commonly misused to just refer to an individual household having the wife or mother as the head because it is so unheard of to be a true parallel to patriarchy



I know, we have similar educational backgrounds!  But I lack the patience to sing to the deaf...




Vendaval -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 2:17:40 PM)

tammyjo,
 
Thank you for taking the time to explain the basic terms for this class discussion. [;)]




PeonForHer -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 2:32:42 PM)

Do we have any anthropologists in the house?

I've heard that a society will be more likely to have been matriarchal in structure if it's been primitive enough not to understand how sex works.

I've heard it put to me like this:  a man has sex with a woman, and doesn't know why he has that urge.  Some time later, the woman gives birth.  No-one in that hypothetical "primitive society" knows why this happens.  No-one relates the act of a man and woman having sex with the baby being born.  It's important to remember in this just how long gestation is in humans versus other creatures.

So, all the people in that hypothetical society know is that, as if by magic, women produce new humans from inside themselves - whereas men don't.  Pretty damned miraculous - and no wonder that such societies would end up matriarchal. 

Being able to squeeze out a new human from inside oneself is pretty impressive, when you step a long way back and think about it. 





OttersSwim -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 3:02:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
I've heard it put to me like this:  a man has sex with a woman, and doesn't know why he has that urge.  Some time later, the woman gives birth.  No-one in that hypothetical "primitive society" knows why this happens.  No-one relates the act of a man and woman having sex with the baby being born.  It's important to remember in this just how long gestation is in humans versus other creatures.


This explains so much male behavior since those days...I think no one bothered to tell these guys!  [;)]




PeonForHer -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 3:13:33 PM)

This explains so much male behavior since those days...I think no one bothered to tell these guys!  [;)]

True.  But let's face it, who'd want to talk about it in decent circles?  Giving birth and all that business is all rather disgusting, isn't it?  It's not civilised. 




Vendaval -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 3:49:50 PM)

Who says human are civilized?  [sm=club.gif]




LadyHibiscus -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 6:47:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Do we have any anthropologists in the house?



Waves hand, waits for Shakti to come in with the eloquent explanation.




ShaktiSama -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 10:20:04 PM)

*wakes from her nap with a snort*  Wuzzat?

Sorry, did someone have an anthropological question? 




MissEnchanted -> RE: New Boys (1/29/2009 11:38:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I've said this before, but it bears repeating, I think.

In the UK, we have the institution known as the "finishing school".  At age 18, girls whose parents can afford it will attend one of these to be taught how to be "ladies".  Cheltenham Ladies' College is one of the most famous.  Google it if you want a little titter over quaint Brit eccentricities.

It's so frequently occurred to me that the girls don't need such finishing schools - the boys do.  Things would be so much smoother between the two sexes if males as a whole learnt a few things regarding how not to act like animals.     


A school to help boys become gentlemen would be cool and I'm betting the graduates would go on to accomplish great things not just in their personal life but in their business lives as well. One can be assertive in business and still be a gentlemen. You make more friends and allies that way.

I dreamed of running a school like this since I was about 20.

Great reading. Thanks to all for what you shared.

#1 I am Human
#2 I am a Woman
#3 I am a Domina by choice and inclination.

If I am approached with good manners the rest just might fall into place.




LadyofGrace -> RE: New Boys (1/31/2009 3:59:47 PM)

That is a good point Otter. I usually assume they are self interested players when some might be new and not understand things well.

There are still alot of the self interested players though who seem to think we are Mistress on call for their fetishes. It is more then annoying and does make us have very little patience with it.




LdyyR -> RE: New Boys (1/31/2009 5:56:29 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyofGrace

That is a good point Otter. I usually assume they are self interested players when some might be new and not understand things well.

There are still alot of the self interested players though who seem to think we are Mistress on call for their fetishes. It is more then annoying and does make us have very little patience with it.



I couldn't agree more. It's one of the reasons I was MIA from anything to do with bdsm relationships for the past couple of years.

I don't mind sharing thoughts and dealing with someone new, but I am not willing to be an extension to someones right hand. I've pretty much accepted that its less likely to encounter many males not looking for some fantasy fulfillment via these mediums. It can happen, but it will be a rare event no matter how much you hear them profess otherwise.




UPSG -> RE: New Boys (1/31/2009 9:12:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo


quote:

ORIGINAL: UPSG

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

Anyone not of the elites of any society has routinely been used by those in power. That seems to be part of the human equation, fair or not.

Within those classes though women, on average, were given less legal, social, and economic power so in that sense yes women as a group have been more oppressed than men.


By-and-large I would agree with you. I think on one hand, given the complexity of life, one can risk over-generalizing about that. I think it would be kind of like me asserting Black people have been more oppressed than white people throughout the sum of world history. That's a big leap of assumption.

Supposedly - and this is what scholars and historians claim for whatever it's worth (you know they are prone to change their minds) - men and women were relatively equal (egalitarian society) in "tribal" level societies (hunters and gathers basically). But from the chiefdom level that declined a bit, and at the "civilization" level males gained almost total power.

My personal opinion, from my own personal reading, is that privilege has historically had more to do with one's socio-economic class than their sex. I'm sure this is not a premises that would be popular with feminist ideology or literature but it is my opinion.

Putting aside Athens or the Republic of Venice etc... democracy (and the other two were never pure democracies) is relatively new to human civilizations. Even in the United States not all White men (let alone Blacks or Indians) could vote originally. This came to change and it took longer for women to win suffrage. However, a woman having a "good" husband was arguably no worse than a male sub or slave having a "good" mistress.



See, this is actually I a subject I do study professionally.

I'll point out that within your above examples you lists ways that women have been given less value in societies, economic systems and legal systems. The very fact that democracy gave legal rights to some men but no women demonstrates that in the USA -- other nations have difference experiences.

You can't honestly compared Blacks to women. Blacks and Whites are not categories which cross all cultures and all time period -- men and women are such categories just as age categories are.

That said, throughout history a woman within the highest levels of her society, you are correct that this was a "class" thing if you expand that definition, would have more social and economic power than a man from the lower classes. Legal rights varied widely. I cannot think of more than a handful of cultures where within a class the man and woman had equal value.

Individual families and subcultures might value other criteria more than biological sex but that has not been common.

Finding these counter examples is very important for it demonstrates that human beings are varied but these example do not counter general social, political, economic, and other trends. They offer proof that none of this is natural but merely cultural and as such things can be changed -- for positive or negative.

Can someone tell me again how this entire discussion turned from the OP? I'm seeing how it deals with his concerns or experiences.



The Emit Till situation - which happened in the 1950's - does not suggest White-American women were denied social protection nor protection under the law.

Democracy is really a tiresome issue because few Americans really have any concept of what it means. And furthermore the United States has always been undergoing a process of becoming more democratized. At onetime in the United States impoverished, White-American, that did not own land, were denied the right to vote.

Yes, women have been discriminated against in a systematic way, but arguably so has much of male mankind. When in human history have most men (males) been given opportunity for upward mobility? Few to none. Like women they were born in, raised in, toiled in, and died in their socio-economic class from birth.

Perhaps the European exploration and colonization around the world began to alter some of that. A Castilian half starving in what is now Spain, could travel to the New World, murder and pillage like La Cosa Nostra, and make his his fortune. The sword and big balls were needed. But even in such enterprises we find female Spaniards fighting with sword to steal and earn her wealth like her male compatriots. We find this same thing with Southern Italian women today in the Comarra.

The issue of brutality tends to center around a woman *cooking.* Well hell, most great chefs are male. Having worked as a cook in more than one restuarant I can tell you that it's worse than cooking in a home - taking your time. There is nothing wromng with cooking. In fact I would rather be a house-husband, fuck, cook, send the kids off to school, watch tv, clean an already fairly clean house, than go off to work in some coal mine to kill myself slowly of lung disease by the time I'm in my 50's or 60's.




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