Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

How I Lost My Pants


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> How I Lost My Pants Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 6:19:59 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		So one day I went skiing, fully dressed and properly kitted out. After spending a bit too much time in the lodge with some friendly frat boys, I hit the slopes, all 5 of them. Yes i was pie-eyed and so drunk I thought i could still ski safely.

So i get on the chair and my pole gets tangled with my skis and my not-latched on properly boots. While i am trying to get my feet and arms and skis sorted, i got my pants caught on the metal loop on the side of the chair. The person on the chair was NOT best pleased to be stuck in a lift with a drunk spazz, let me tell ya. He certainly told me, all three of them.

Yes I was really that drunk. So some how, I tucked one ski tip through a belt loop and turned to yell at the man/men calling me names when suddenly *poof* the ride was over!

I had one ski in my hand, one in my pants and two (or more) poles swinging around when my boots dug into the snow throwing me forward while the skis stayed on the chair.... with a sizable portion of my pants.

So half naked, tangled in the chair, being screamed at by a man with anywhere from 1 to 5 heads and i start to pass out. That is when the dangling part of my pants got caught under my boots and my poles and RIP>>>>  now i am shivering, drunk, showing my days of the week panties and on the brink of passing out. So what else can go wrong, i ask myself.

That is when the next lift chair hit me in the back and i slid down the slope loosing the rest of my pants, one boot, both poles, one glove, my hat, my dignity, and my breakfast.

Ski patrol had to cart me down the hill in blankets and i was banned from that ski resort for the season.

The moral of this story is don't try to keep up with frat boys doing shots and then handle complicated tasks... like walking.


_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 6:25:08 PM   
T1981


Posts: 557
Joined: 12/6/2008
Status: offline 		AHAHAHA!!!! Thank you so much for sharing this story, that's beyond hilarious!! Finally got to read it - YAY!!!!!

This is why I would never go skiing, I don't drink but with my luck I'd still somehow wind up pantless!

And now your sig line makes PERFECT sense, too!


_____________________________

"Nothing is pointless, every single thing you do resonates." -Pintsize

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 6:28:38 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		It was one of the few times I really drank, like more than a mimosa for mother's day or a glass of champers on new years. Ok and that bad run of red hots on my 21 birthday *shudder*

_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to T1981)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 6:42:34 PM   
jen182


Posts: 495
Joined: 11/29/2008
Status: offline 		wow, that sounds like something that would happen to me....except i wouldnt need to be drunk, im always loosing my pants somehow

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 6:43:53 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		Shirts are a problem for me and sweater. I can loose those in the blink of an eye

_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to jen182)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 6:44:11 PM   
T1981


Posts: 557
Joined: 12/6/2008
Status: offline 		Heh - but I bet that makes you all the sexier...!!!

_____________________________

"Nothing is pointless, every single thing you do resonates." -Pintsize

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 6:50:33 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		Sexy is as sexy does *wink* and it takes one to know one you hot chick you.

_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to T1981)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 7:21:00 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		LMAO, Fey!! what a..*ahem*.. memorable ski trip!!

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 7:25:07 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		yeah it was, one of the ski instructors was really sexy and she had like 3 degrees. Serious brains and boobs *sigh* goooood times.

_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 7:53:14 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		We have lots of ski slopes in Colorado.  Come on over and get banned from each in turn.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/28/2009 8:16:57 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		Sorry I don't drink any more *for obvious reasons* but i love skiing...

_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 5:53:56 AM   
favesclava


Posts: 1608
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline 		i can never blame my bad/slutty behavior on drinking. only one i my family that has never been drunk. did get tipsy a couple of times...maybe for Daddy's birthday. i'll post if i do.

_____________________________

weird is relative not an absolute term. Baron Frank N. Furter
Resident jingly dancing girl
The Pookie Of Darkness
Okay? Ready? Fine .Here's my hand. We are going now. I know the way. All you have to do is hold on tight ... and believe.SK

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 8:02:03 AM   
sparkyRBF


Posts: 157
Joined: 2/23/2007
Status: offline 		Oh my goodness!!!  I read that one outloud to Master. 

Glad you weren't seriously hurt because then it wouldn't have been so funny.  Do you feel your inebriated state helped keep you from getting hurt? 

thank you so much for sharing and enjoyed the laugh.


_____________________________

sparkyRBF
Happily owned slave
of
RedBotttomFarms

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 8:59:03 AM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		I actually did get a little hurt, lots of bruises and mild hypothermia (which was probably made worse by the drinking). And i had the mother of all headaches that night and next morning. I am not sure if that is because i took a ski to the head or from the booze or both. I leave out the pain part because that sort of kills the funny in the story.

favesclava: I too can't blame drinking for bad or slutty behavior, but i can laugh myself silly about the stooopid things i have done when i have gotten drunk.


_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to sparkyRBF)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 9:32:24 AM   
MissKittynSean


Posts: 35
Joined: 10/4/2004
Status: offline 		Seems like everyone is losing their pants on the slopes recently ... take this poor bastard for instance.  He wasn't under the influence at all, but I'm sure that as soon as he got back to the lodge he made sure to get a drink.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0106091vail1.html

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 10:29:13 AM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		DoOOood! Poor man! I used to have nightmares about the chair lift trying to bite me in half, but this poor guy seems to have experienced it! (and i still had panties on....)

_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to MissKittynSean)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 10:36:28 AM   
Saratov


Posts: 1716
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline 		And just where are the pics of your mishap Fey?!?

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 10:40:27 AM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		uuuuummmmmm... You remember those frat boys? well I don't.

_____________________________

Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

(in reply to Saratov)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 4:47:58 PM   
MissKittynSean


Posts: 35
Joined: 10/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: feydeplume

DoOOood! Poor man! I used to have nightmares about the chair lift trying to bite me in half, but this poor guy seems to have experienced it! (and i still had panties on....)


Lol, I know, I felt so bad for him while I was laughing to the point of tears!  Honestly though, I have lost my pants twice in my life. 

First time:  Sober, shopping for clothes with my mom.  I accidentally put my pants in the "return" pile, and after my mom took them she had to leave and go back to work so I ended up stuck in the dressing room, sans pants, waiting for someone who worked in the store to go through every pair of pants in the dressing room returns trying to find the pair without tags.

Second time: Not sober, at a beach party.  Sometime between midnight and 2 PM I and a few others decided it would be great to go for a swim in the ocean and when I got out, I had no pants.  I didn't take them off before getting in the water, and I didn't take them off to dry off.  They just floated away and I had to sneak back to my house wet, cold, pantless, and missing my wallet!

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: How I Lost My Pants - 1/29/2009 11:09:46 PM   
FullfigRIMAAM1


Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
Status: offline 		LOL, this should be a skit on saturday night live.  Is it?    M

_____________________________

The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands.-Robert M. Persig

Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence Erich Fromm

(in reply to feydeplume)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> How I Lost My Pants Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094