RE: Shyness and Submission? (Full Version)

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SwimGoldfishSwim -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/1/2009 6:37:44 PM)

i don't think there is any correlation between shyness and submissiveness. Personally i have a slight problem with authority figures, no idea why. i don't consider it submissiveness with others more just being polite. i am quite stubborn at some points and stick up for what i think is right but i am quite shy at first but i don't think i am submissive because of that.



greeneyedreamer -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/1/2009 9:28:20 PM)

personally, I would have to say no... I am not the least bit shy or subdued. I am funny, can be rather loud, (dad was hard of hearing, always talked loud) and very silly at times. Oh well so much for being the stereotypical anything... LOL



devotedinSD -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/1/2009 9:40:15 PM)

No, I am not shy or inhibited around people of power. In my every day vanilla life I tend to be a bit on the dominant side even.



BondageBarbieX -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 1:29:00 AM)

I am painfully shy and it has got worse over time to the point were I avoid contact with people and I spend most of my time inside my house were I am safe from having to deal with it.



IrishMist -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 3:51:21 AM)

quote:

Do you believe there is a relationship between shyness/introversion and submissiveness?

No



mya75 -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 3:57:37 AM)

I was shy up until I stumbled upon BDSM



GabrielleSlave -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 4:10:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Anastasia25

Do you believe there is a relationship between shyness/introversion and submissiveness?

No, although before i met Master and tumbled headlong into BDSM i was painfully shy.  Don't think such a sweeping statement can hold true.

quote:

Are you the type of person who is or has been shy and submissive, in the presence of authority figures or people of power?

Yes, i suppose i have been in the past, but now i am more respectful than just plain shy.  This is especially true in the scene.

quote:

How did your submissive traits play out, day-to-day, before you found a Master or Mistress?

To be brutally honest i was a doormat.  When someone is constantly put upon, or demeaned, they start to believe it.  i was horribly shy as a girl and this carried on through bullying at school and then into my marriage.  Don't get me wrong, my ex and i are good friends now, but he was a domineering bully who didn't pull his weight back then and i disappered.  My natural shyness was allowed to take over...

i think a good question to follow on with this line of thinking, would be - How, if at all has meeting your Master or Mistress changed the way you deal with life? If someone was to ask most submissives that question i am sure you would get an amazing set of answers *giggles*

hugs

gabrielle x (who is now one of the most showoffy exhibitionists she knows lol!)



feydeplume -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 6:22:18 AM)

i don't mean to pry or judge, I am just concerned from your words that it might be more than being "shy". if it is then HUGS and it doesn't have to stay that way.



daddysprop247 -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 7:39:50 AM)

there are basically two schools of thought on this one.

one is that one's relationship orientation is something completely irrespective of one's set personality. those whose submissiveness is triggered by the right person or right type of person, or who feels "inspired" to submit to a particular person, as well as those who for whatever reason make the conscious choice to submit in a particular context...would all fall under this category.

then there is the idea that one's personality and nature DOES connect to one's relationship orientation. i personally tend to believe this, as it's difficult for me to comprehend submissiveness (or dominance for that matter) that doesn't align with the rest of one's way of life or personality. if one is a personality-type submissive, then shyness often comes as a part of that package. shyness is something i've been dealing with all of my life, and has often been a handicap...not just around so-called authority figures but anyone.



T1981 -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 8:10:09 AM)

I have to toss my hat in the "not shy" ring. If anything, I'm loud, bossy, domineering, over-talkative, and hyperactive in my vanilla life, even towards my husband. My submission provides a release from that and it's providing a new way to relate to people. A slow process, but one worth exploring.



Mercnbeth -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 9:35:30 AM)

quote:

Do you believe there is a relationship between shyness/introversion and submissiveness?


maybe...depending on the individual.  submissive folk don't all experience submissiveness in the same exact way.

quote:

Are you the type of person who is or has been shy and submissive, in the presence of authority figures or people of power?


yes.  to the point of being unable to speak/stuttering/ crying.

quote:

How did your submissive traits play out, day-to-day, before you found a Master or Mistress?

this slave served her family's(parents and offspring) interests and demands, as well as volunteering any extra time she had to those in the community or whoever crossed her path expressing a need.



sparkyRBF -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 9:36:34 AM)

no, i don't believe that shyness = submission or vice versa, but i do think there is a connection.  

I feel shyness is more of a social or self esteem issue.  Being a submissive, i feel, builds confidence and self esteem.  The more my Master shows he is proud of me and happy the more confident i feel in being myself, submissive.  The more confident i feel, the less shy i feel. 



thetab -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 9:38:16 AM)

I'm horribly shy, but it's usually only at first, when I don't know the people I'm with.  Once I know them, I tend to talk just as easily as everyone else.



littleone35 -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 11:32:21 AM)

As a child i was very shy.  If i had to stand up to give a talk in front of the class i would start sweating and shaking and get really pale. Gettng  a job and working in food service  mostly cured me at that to the point in college giving a talk in fromt of the class still bothered me, but i could do it. 
I have never benn submissive in front of people of power did not really faze me. 
I have always been submissive with family putting thrier needs in front of mine.
I am not very intrvorted nor extrovorted either somewhere in the middle so has nothing to do with me being a submissive.

Matt's littleone



missfrillypants -> RE: Shyness and Submission? (2/2/2009 11:39:26 AM)

well... i'm a very loud introvert. people don't notice i am one until i wander off into my cave for a few months and forget they exist. when i go out you'd never think i was one. but i can be shy, and the more submissive i feel towards someone, the more shy i get, to the point where people sometimes have trouble realizing i'm interested because i just kind of freeze up. i'm not sure why, but it's a correlation i've noticed in myself between the two things.



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