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When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/1/2009 9:02:40 PM   
SassySarijane


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Status: offline 		When you hear the word fantasy, do you always think it's sexual? I think for a lot of people, myself included, it's the first thing that comes to mind at least. I have definitely been guilty of it over and over. I've had a fantasy for awhile that I really hoped to one day get to try. It is totally nonsexual and it sounded like it'd be fun and I was really curious as to how it would be to actually do it. I'm sure many would think it's silly and/or lame, but I don't care. It's mine and I wanted to try it. I am a bubble wrap freak.....absolutely love it and am compulsive with it. I will sit there with it and pop away while drifting off into thought: working out a serious issue, remembering something, or just puzzling out something that comes to mind or zoning out.  About a month and a half ago on a local group I'm in we were all teasing and bantering back and forth and I popped off with a comment about wanting to be wrapped in bubble wrap and a singletail used to see how many bubbles it could pop. It fit in great with the teasing going on, but I also indicated that I was serious in wanting to experience it someday if I could find someone I trust who'd actually be interested in doing it. Two weeks ago at the last play party I went to, thanks to a couple who are wonderful friends, I got to. It was a total surprise and I so did not expect it. It was such a blast, a lot of fun and went very well for an impulse scene. I definitely want to try it again sometime and only two small adjustments need to be made to make it as perfect as it could get. Do you have fantasies that are nonsexual or do you consider all fantasies sexual and use some other term for nonsexual fantasies?


< Message edited by SassySarijane -- 2/1/2009 9:11:37 PM >

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/1/2009 9:05:52 PM   
Daddysredhead


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Status: offline 		My fantasies all tend to be sexual.  But I think that's because I am very lust-driven in my thoughts.  I just don't seem to have any non-sexual fantasies, esp. where BDSM is involved.  I don't do the SM part without a healthy dose of sex involved somewhere.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/1/2009 9:22:22 PM   
catize


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Status: offline 		A fantasy to me is anything I want to do and haven’t done yet or want to do and know it probably will never happen.  For example, I often fantasize that I will win the lottery and never have to worry about money again! 

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/1/2009 9:39:37 PM   
cagliostro


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Status: offline 		In my experience people tend to use the word fantasy in reference to sexual fantasies.  I think the connotation has taken over the meaning of the word.  Personally, I do have non-sexual fantasies, and use the word for both. 

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/1/2009 10:16:16 PM   
dreamerdreaming


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SassySarijane

When you hear the word fantasy, do you always think it's sexual?
 
No.

...Do you have fantasies that are nonsexual

Yes, plenty. For example: Dreams of travelling the world (either to places I've already been, or places I haven't yet), or getting into some other line of work, or what the distant future will be like, in my lifetime... What my grandchildren will be like, etc...

or do you consider all fantasies sexual and use some other term for nonsexual fantasies?

Whether sexual or not, I tend to call them "dreams".  (Surprise!)



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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/1/2009 10:46:02 PM   
Andalusite


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Status: offline 		Nah, when I hear the word "fantasy," I usually assume they mean the literary genre, like dragons and unicorns and whatnot.

There are lots of BDSM-oriented things that I'm interested in trying, that are non-sexual or at least not explicitly sexual. I've done some casual play in the past, to explore some areas I was interested in (either with individuals I knew, or as a demo or participant in a class). I explicitly have limits on sexual behaviour, and will safe out if I get too aroused by someone I'm not romantically involved with. Right now, I'm not looking for casual playpartners, but when I was, I was very direct about my limits in that area.

< Message edited by Andalusite -- 2/1/2009 10:49:08 PM >

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/1/2009 11:35:10 PM   
WinsomeDefiance


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Status: offline 		I don't know SassySariJane, but I am definitely up for being wrapped in bubble wrap if a singletail is anywhere near the vacinity of my person.  Bubble wrap or some other buffer; 20 miles, minimum works for me.

As for fantasy, I don't necessarily associate sex with the word.  For me, fantasy is simply anything within the scope of my imagination. 

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 12:27:46 AM   
ALAstella


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Status: offline 		The way things are at the moment I tend to mainly associate the word 'fantasy' with politics.

To me a fantasy is something imagined, whether it is possible or not.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 12:36:30 AM   
MistressRouge


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Status: offline 		I have a number of fantasies, some I have re-enacted, some that need to remain embedded in my thought.

I have sexual fantasies, however my sadistic fantasies start out as none sexual, but may  then merge into a sexual once the sadism begins.

So there are both in my case, then fuse into one

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 12:42:13 AM   
IronBear


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Status: offline 		When  I hear or think of the word fantasy, I think of Tollkien's LoR and similar yarns. 

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 5:06:09 AM   
CatdeMedici


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quote:

ORIGINAL: catize

A fantasy to me is anything I want to do and haven’t done yet or want to do and know it probably will never happen.  For example, I often fantasize that I will win the lottery and never have to worry about money again! 


I'm with catize on this one, I am just not a fantasy person, most of the time, I set the goal and achieve it, otherwise its not worth My brain power---EXCEPT for the lottery one, but even that I keep in realistic bounds.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 5:14:45 AM   
Gwynssoftandshy


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Status: offline 		i fantasize rather a lot.  Most of it isn't sexual at all, although it does tend to have undertones of power exchange.  ~smiles~  i'm a bit of a dreamer really, and i'm lucky enough to be in a space and with someone where it's safe.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 5:19:47 AM   
colouredin


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Status: offline 		Hmmm I use the term fantasy a lot and dont really consider it sexual, I often use it as a negative thing 'oh you are living in a fantasy world' I think because I am so unbelivably cynical.

I also dont really have many sexual fantasies dunno why I just dont

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 5:45:40 AM   
feydeplume


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Status: offline 		Fantasy all by it self tends to mean "this way to the dragons and fairies" section of the books store while erotica/sexual literature means "this way to the porn". fantasy land almost always brings to mine fantasy island, the one i saw where the god got mad and things went badly for people. Day dream is a happy mindwander, be it sexual, epicurean, travel, or having a bleeding maid in for the day. And yes those often have sexual elements; happy thoughts often have sexy bits in them for me.

But i rarely script out a scene or something as a sexual fantasy. I usually do those on paper/computer with spell check.  

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 5:47:35 AM   
BLKMADONA


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Status: offline 		When I hear the word "fantasy" I turn around and back away slowly..heh.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 6:03:23 AM   
SassySarijane


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Andalusite

I explicitly have limits on sexual behaviour, and will safe out if I get too aroused by someone I'm not romantically involved with. Right now, I'm not looking for casual playpartners, but when I was, I was very direct about my limits in that area.


Sexual behavior as part of the play is one of my limits as well. When I play, I'm looking for strictly s/m play not sex and I won't bottom for someone who wants sex (whether intercourse or not) as part of it. Casual sex just doesn't interest me and never did much for me. Right now play and sex are separate for me.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 6:10:27 AM   
SassySarijane


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From: KC Area Missouri
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quote:

ORIGINAL: WinsomeDefiance

I don't know SassySariJane, but I am definitely up for being wrapped in bubble wrap if a singletail is anywhere near the vacinity of my person.  Bubble wrap or some other buffer; 20 miles, minimum works for me.

As for fantasy, I don't necessarily associate sex with the word.  For me, fantasy is simply anything within the scope of my imagination. 


Ummm maybe I just shouldn't mention that bubble wrap provides absolutely no buffer whatsoever *grin* I'm thinking the 20 miles is definitely going to work better for you, trust me on that. For me it was a lot of fun though and really intense.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 6:15:38 AM   
SassySarijane


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From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline 		*grins at Stella* You and me both.

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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 6:23:49 AM   
kittinSol


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Status: offline 		It depends on the context. If I'm conversing with a geek and he refers to the word 'fantasy'  I'm close to 100% certain that he's referring to some sad alternative world, like World of Warcraft, and not to some hot carnal exchange scenario.




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RE: When You Hear the Word Fantasy - 2/2/2009 6:23:59 AM   
SassySarijane


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I fantasize too both sexually and nonsexually. Some of those I have gotten to act out, some I haven't, some I want to act out/try sometime and some I don't, that I just want to remain fantasy or don't think it would be good or go right if attempted.

Usually when someone starts telling me they have a fantasy, it turns out to be sexual, hence why all too often sex comes to mind when it's said. I know there are nonsexual fantasies and I have them as stated. How often does someone mention having a fantasy they want to tell you about that turns out to not be sexual?

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