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DesFIP -> RE: Interracial Master/sub relationships (2/18/2009 4:43:25 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
quote:
ORIGINAL: lronitulstahp
i have been with brilliant men, at the top of ther respective careers. The TDHO is one of the most educated, cultured, intellegent, articulate well-spoken men i have ever met. i choose to follow Him for those reasons...not His Caramel sexiness. Were He a white guy, with all the same attributes...i'd have done the same. That being said, there is a certain level of understanding, and explaining i don't have to do because we do share a common culture.
I highlighted the above because having spent all day yesterday watching movies in my living room and talking with the (black) man I'm recently seeing, I came to realize I feel like such a foreigner to his culture, and it intimidated me. This man is gorgeous, sexy, intelligent and very kind. And yet there seem to be so many areas I don't relate to him with and I wonder if that will eventually become a barrier to us developing anything further. Now I realize we create our own barriers, but I have honestly never felt this disconnected from someone else's upbringing and way of life. I would very much appreciate anything anyone can advise me about this. I've never cared what pigmentation someone was born with, but I also never considered how different our cultures may be.
My personal experience is that being from totally different cultures is a barrier to creating a long term relationship. You can ask for clarification and try to be sensitive but inevitably you will need to relax and not have this tension between you.
I'm a New York Jew. The Man is from PA, a heavily Baptist area. These differences don't hit often but when they do, they hit hard. If I'm sick, all I want is chicken soup with matzo balls. For my family, this is comfort food. He doesn't see this as dinner, doesn't like it at all. For any other New Yorker this would have been something he would have been used to from friends' homes, delis, etc.
Same with me being an old fashioned liberal. In New York, you will always have known people like me. In his background, people who thought like me never existed. He has family members who think Harry Potter promotes witchcraft and ought to be banned from school. My ums go to a high school where freshman English is composed entirely of banned books to teach the sacredness of free speech and thought.
As far as the Croat who would willingly date a Serb, all I have to say is "WOW". My travels years ago in Yugoslavia taught me that was the ultimate divide.
And re sambas experience? She isn't alone from my readings. http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1316/is_3_34/ai_83794453
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