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Honsoku -> RE: young=Bad Dom, true? (3/1/2009 12:29:19 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: devotedOwner19
Howdy it seems to me in general there seems to be the opinon that by the virtue of being young automatically makes inexperainced,bad dom,and or unable to make life decisions. And being older means automatically your experianced,more likely to be a good Dom, and or able to make life decisions. I myself disagree while i may be less experianced then someone say whoes been in the lifestyle 30 years that wouldnt make me a bad dom or unable to make life decisions. what everyone opinon and why?
Whenever someone posts a complaint about not being taken seriously because of their age, they invariably come across so poorly that they reinforce the very stereotype that they are railing against. This leads to people posting things this;
quote:
ORIGINAL: DesFIP You are 19 years old. There are going to be a great many life decisions you cannot make because you have no practical knowledge of them. Have you ever bought a house? Raised offspring? Bought a new car? Held a job for 10 years?
Hell, for that matter do you even support yourself? Because if you are lying to your parents about what you do, while telling your sub that she needs to be honest, makes you a hypocrite in my eyes. It may be necessary for you to lie about your sex life if you want your tuition to be paid, but it still doesn't make you someone honest.
Someone who tried to tell me how to raise my son, when he is damn near the same age, is not someone whom I could trust to see things from the view that experience will give. You may see no use to a college education, but someone 20 years older who has been turned down for promotions due to the lack of that degree will have a vastly different view of the situation.
To which the response is this: How many people do you know that have been through those very experiences and still can't tell their ass from a hole in the ground? If someone has to have practical experience with a decision before being able to make it, how would anyone be able to make that decision for the first time? The people that much a huge deal about experience generally see that as their main selling point. "I may not be bright, I may not be attractive, I may not be wise, but by George, have I got experience!". Do you like how I just generalized a large group of people in a negative way?
By and large, people are shallow, judgmental, and prejudiced (despite protestations to the contrary). We are wired to be that way. We are wired to make quick decisions on little information, to seek out patterns to such a degree that we see patterns where there aren't any, and to act on those perceived patterns as if they were law. A recent example is when I started posting on another BDSM forum. There, I hadn't chosen an avatar, people couldn't see my age, and I posted under a Latin name. The difference in reaction between here and there was night and day. Yet, all that had changed were totally superficial elements, not the voice.
Individuals generally do get better with age, though the rate is vastly different from person to person. Experience is only as good as what you learn from it. The truly wise person learns from others' successes and mistakes, as well as his own.
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