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CNJDom -> RE: Looks and weight (6/24/2009 9:51:46 PM)
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As it's been said by nearly all, we all have some sort of preference. I'm the kind that likes ALL women, but I don't lust after women that look like choir-boys. My personal preference are for shapely women, but I will not judge anyone by their looks or their weight. We as people will have learned responses to certain features of certain people due to past experiences...someone will remind you strongly of someone in your past and you may react towards that person with a pre-disposed behavior of like or dislike based on the prior experience. Can't be helped... human nature. We try to consciously rationalize that though this person looks like someone from our past, they are NOT that person and should probably be given a chance. Human nature can listen to reason, though sometimes it gets lost along the way.
To judge someone solely on their appearance or weight, is to generalize them, or categorize them without really getting to know them. Beauty is skin-deep, but I have known those where this was all there was... and underneath was pure ugly straight to the bone. Being beautiful doesn't guarantee someone is beautiful throughout. If you think looks are that important, then there will be a time when YOU are going to be passed along due to your looks. And though you may not know it directly ...it's probably ALREADY has happened to you by some superficial shallow individual. The real shock is when you find out that this standard you hold onto others, can be held to you as well personally. Will you be offended? Hurt? Does it matter? If it goes around, it comes around.
Those that cling onto youth by only hanging out with age-inappropriate others, that's not a good thing either. Yes you can look thinner by making friends with people fatter than you.... You can't really look younger though if you only choose 18-yr. olds when you are in your second childhood late 30's or 40's or even past that. Again that is a preference, but if doing this you think makes you look younger, and not out of love, then that is sadly pathetic. Next thing you know, you'll be sporting a speedo thinking that it makes you look more buff (as long as you squint from focusing in on that pooch you're sucking in).
Of course those that require changes due to health matters should consider that in a healthy manner. If what is happening is not healthy, then work on it, and be healthy. It isn't a matter about beauty at that point, it's about living and setting a higher standard and comfort level of the living standard on a personal basis.
I know it may sound silly, but try applying that "golden rule" stuff in this: "Judge unto others as you would have them judge unto you..." And if you think those that are overweight or such are not in control of their lives or something like that, try looking at the anorexic model like person killing herself to look like what the fashion industry has dictated her to look like when it's not real. That stereotype has damaged more women and skewed what the male population feels is hot. There's a lot of normal women that wouldn't muster past the "beauty standard" bar that is set by some, that are PLENTY HOT. And if a woman is feeling good about herself, that means more to her and those around her, which is a beautiful thing indeed. If you are comfortable with youself, then others are comfortable with you...that is what matters.
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