Mercnbeth
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This slave is trying real hard to help you out, but just as she dozen’t know how to explain to someone how it is possible to put down a beloved crack-pipe one day forever without benefit of rehab, pills, death, incarceration, intervention or conventional therapy—but hey, this slave still knows for a fact it CAN be done----this slave will do her best to explain to you how it is that a particular emotion can be absent from one’s experience.
It is this slave’s understanding that emotions are not universally passive in each individuals experience and haven’t been since before the origin of the concept of good vs. evil or karma. Some spiritual folk believe that emotions are the physical representation of spiritual entities and we can accept and feed them energy or banish them.
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I am wondering if this is what was meant when using the word “sow”; that emotions can trigger behaviors that lead to either harmony or discord within ourselves or our relationships?
It means that and a little bit extra: You reap what your emotions sow. You also reap what your behaviors that are triggered by those emotions sow. Certain emotions are not only specifically designed to trigger behavior but also show up in a measurable physiological response—expressed verbally, physically, otherwise or not expressed consciously at all. Some folks pick up on it without you having to utter a sound or behave in a certain manner and certain animals definitely do, within range of course.
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What about the emotions that are not expressed, can they actually do anything?
Yes, they can make you physically ill AND suck the joy out of your life,…or in the case of certain animals, eliminating the emotion of fear when dealing with them, not just thoughts or displays of fear, is crucial to working with them.
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I believe you can choose to behave in a manner that does not reflect your current emotions or that constructively deals with your emotions. I can be annoyed, but choose to let the emotion go and to behave in a way that indicates happiness, so my emotion of annoyance will not trigger anything since I am not expressing it. I can also be annoyed and then choose to express that emotion in a constructive way that deepens the connection between me and another person and strengthens the relationship. I can be annoyed and choose to express that emotion in a way that weakens or destroys the relationship. It is the same emotion, but different outcomes based on the choice of behaviors.
It is this slave’s opinion that another alternative exists-- that it is possible to train to not even become annoyed to begin with instead of tediously strategizing how to deal with becoming annoyed from time to time on an ongoing basis. Maybe not everyone can, but this slave knows of one for sure.
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So is it the emotion or the way the emotion is expressed that is the determining factor of whether there will be harmony or discord?
It can be either or both. It has been this slave’s experience that you can “express” however you want, it is your underlying emotion, the one that you are actually feeling to wards your significant other, that will set the stage for how you function in that relationship. Some folks don’t feel love or affection for their partner, or jealousy, or contempt.
For example: Master has complete authority. This slave is comfortable with that and feels very positive emotions with regards to that relationship dynamic. The responses “I don’t feel like it” and “what about what I want” or emotions of jealousy or annoyance have no place in that construct, logically or emotionally. Once again, just because this slave is “human” or imperfect, doesn’t mean she gets annoyed at Master or His authority.
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I could take any emotion and based on the behavior that I choose to express that emotion (and when I choose to express it) create harmony or discord, even the emotion of happiness. In fact I do use the expression of happiness to create discord;
This slave sees that as merely your manipulation of an expression of happiness, like an actress tries to convince us of emotions she isn’t really feeling, but your intent is to create dis-chord and to the receptive, sensitive or intelligent, they might just be amused at your insincerity and not play into your scheme to create dis-chord by feigning happiness and harmony-- in the case of the actress, she might fail at her attempts and not get the job, because she just wasn’t “believable”.
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have you ever noticed how much more frustrated someone will get when they are ranting at you and you just smile and are cheerful?
No. More often than not, it has been this slave’s experience that it calms them down and helps them to discuss something rationally-but this slave gets no thrill from trying to frustrate further already agitated folk, so maybe it isn’t just this slave’s smile and cheerfulness, but the sincerity of her expressions that makes the difference.
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I focus on choosing my behaviors that will create the outcome that I desire.
This slave focuses on choosing behaviors that will create the outcome Master desires. this slave’s service is based on complete surrender to His will and His desires. As far as outcome—this slave strives to focus on obeying and pleasing Master--acting out specifically designed behaviors to effect a particular outcome while attempting to cover up emotions would not please Him.
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I do agree that emotions can be changed. Having positive constructive behaviors and thoughts have changed my emotions more times than I can count. I would not presume to think that I could eliminate them, that there would never be any circumstance in my entire existence that would cause me to feel a particular emotion.
The pharmaceutical industry has made BILLIONS hedging the bet you’ll take ANY risk not to FEEL a particular emotion. No work on your part involved, all you need is a glass of water and a participating physician. For some, it works, for others temporarily, and for still others, it doesn’t. This slave has had permanent success doing it sans pharmaceutical help—natural & holistic remedies, repetitive desensitizing experiences, reprogramming exercises, hypnosis, meditation, spiritual journeys and focus.
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That speaks of an absolute that I just don’t think can be applied to human behavior, thoughts or emotions.
Maybe it can’t be applied to everyone, maybe it isn't possible for you, with the belief structure you have accepted. Maybe this slave is the only person posting here that has effectively eliminated emotions such as jealousy or annoyance in an intimate relationship…but this slave doubts it.
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To say I will never or I will always do, think or feel something would not be realistic;
well, then that opens you up to actually experiencing what this slave has been talking about, since you never say never, you might actually get to a point where you don't feel annoyed at your Lord, regardless of how hard He tries to annoy you~For this slave, there are most definitely things this slave will never do and also things this slave will most certainly think or feel, core values and beliefs that have been proved to this slave without a shadow of a doubt, the most glaring examples are against TOS to discuss.
This slave hopes this has helped you to understand her previous posts.
Edited by Merc to add:
My beloved beth, if the readers of this only knew how you lost a night's sleep trying your best to express your feelings about the manner in which we live. As I said this morning, sometimes written words are the worst method of communication. As long as dictionaries have multiple meanings for most words conveying an understanding of "exactly" what you mean is impossible. But a worthy attempt.
I still say, an infinite number of blind people taking an infinite amount of time will never be able to "visualize" an accurate picture of an elephant, they'll never know if it's purple or gray, yet they will all be "right".
you're so cute! Now go take a nap, knowing you tried your best.
< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 1/27/2006 10:22:05 AM >
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RE: Myths of submission - 
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