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Pants on Fire! - 1/22/2006 12:07:40 PM   
GoddessMorgaine


Posts: 14
Joined: 10/31/2004
Status: offline
A ventriloquist walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.

He figures he'll have some fun, so he says to the owner"Can I talk to your dog?"

Owner: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid git"

Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going mate?

Dog: "Doin' alright"

Owner: (Look of extreme shock)

Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing at the owner)

Dog: "Yep"

Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes
me to the lake once a week to play"

Owner: (Look of disbelief)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

Owner: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either. I think"

Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"

Horse: "Cool"

Owner: (Absolutely dumfounded)

Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing to the owner)

Horse: "Yep"

Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes
me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the
elements"

Owner: (Total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

Owner: (In a panic) "THE SHEEPS A F***ING LIAR"
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RE: Pants on Fire! - 1/22/2006 3:49:12 PM   
MadameDahlia


Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline
The sheep is a liar?

... Bet he's also a very scared sheep too.

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to GoddessMorgaine)
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RE: Pants on Fire! - 1/22/2006 9:50:55 PM   
DameDarkness


Posts: 341
Joined: 10/1/2004
Status: offline
oooooooooooo thats soooooooooooo wrong!

_____________________________

Into the night sky I fly through distant lands and darkened streets... Up into the clouds to play and dance with the moon.....To the hearts of all and I say to you be true to they own heart.

(in reply to MadameDahlia)
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RE: Pants on Fire! - 1/22/2006 9:57:25 PM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline
ROFLMAO

_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to DameDarkness)
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RE: Pants on Fire! - 1/23/2006 1:40:27 AM   
MadameDahlia


Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline
*Cheeky grin*

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 5
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