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RE: Im screwed - 3/8/2009 10:52:44 PM

Vendaval

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Post #: 41

RE: Im screwed - 3/8/2009 11:25:19 PM

ThatDamnedPanda

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Joined: 1/26/2009
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Mariel - first, take this advice....

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

You've got one guy who is starting up again and is lying to you, and one other. They have never met you and think they own you.

Drop both.

And then take this advice....

quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

Suggest you spend some time getting to know yourself better, and what you really need and want out of a relationship, before you waste any more of yours or others' time. Get a clear idea of what will satisfy and fullfill you, and insist on that, rather than just seeing if you fit other people's needs.

You seem like a sincere, well-meaning person, and I don't want to leap down your throat and be unpleasant with you. So please don't take this personally.... but I have to tell you, whichever of these two guys you pick will almost certainly be the wrong decision for you to make, because I don't think you're capable of making a good decision right now. Good decisions are the result of a solid, logical, in-depth thought process, and in all the posts of yours I've read I've seen very little evidence of such a thought process. I don't know if this is typical for you, or if you're just going through some crisis in your life that is affecting your judgment at the moment, but whatever the case may be I think it's almost a certainty that you're barreling 90 miles an hour toward heartbreak at best and grave physical danger at worst. I urge you to stop your search, set it aside for the moment, and take a year or two to figure out who you are, what you really want and need, what you would do with it if you found it, and what it would be reasonable for you to give up in order to have it. I don't think you can answer any of those questions right now, and until you can, you're in no position to make rational major relationship decisions.

You're young. At 37, you have years to find the right relationship. Use some of that time to figure out for yourself exactly what would constitute that "right relationship" for you. Good luck to you, whatever you do.

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Post #: 42

RE: Im screwed - 3/9/2009 10:30:49 AM

littleone35

Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
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I did not read all the answere bu i would say get rid of both of them, and get you head on straight before you look for another relationship. You seem to have some pretty heavy baggage to be toting around.

Matt's littleone

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Post #: 43

RE: Im screwed - 3/9/2009 10:35:06 AM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
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Last time I told a sub to pull her head out of her butt and use common sense the Mods were not happy with me so I'll just say.

God gave you a brain and an intellect, try incorporating it. It's really not that hard.

If a guy dissappears it's cause "HE"S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!!!""

He thought he found someone better and it fell through so he came back to you.

The other guy, well whatever if you want to keep getting to know him better then do so.

You are ULTIMATELY responsible for you and your decisions no one else is so quick pulling the "ohhh i'm just a poor sub" card and put on the big girl panties and own up to your own life.

Drama is tiring in you seem to not only invite it into your life but go looking for it.

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Post #: 44

RE: Im screwed - 3/9/2009 10:41:02 AM

quietcontrary

Posts: 28
Joined: 3/7/2009
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You're a big girl, you get yourself into alot of complex situations, rather frequantly from what I've read. You have asked a question and gotten a variaty of answers, but I honestly think you're not going to be happy with whatever decision you come to. If it were me however.. Take a few days to yourself. Don't talk to either of them, just tell them both you need a bit of space and time to yourself (yes honesty, what a concept) and wait and see who it is you find yourself thinking about when they arn't influancing you one way or another, if you want to get to your real feelings. However I am pesimistic that you'll be following this advice. Please prove me wrong.

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Post #: 45

RE: Im screwed - 3/9/2009 11:00:13 AM

LunaVenus

Posts: 161
Joined: 1/4/2009
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I am confused. How do people consider themselves to be in relationships when they are not in the same state or even country? Is exchanging of emails considered a relationship?

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Post #: 46

RE: Im screwed - 3/9/2009 11:02:16 AM

LaTigresse

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Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LunaVenus

I am confused. How do people consider themselves to be in relationships when they are not in the same state or even country? Is exchanging of emails considered a relationship?

In some alternate realities, yes.

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Post #: 47

RE: Im screwed - 3/9/2009 3:47:55 PM

tsatske

Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
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The first Dom is doing the right thing - paying with you, and claiming 'ownership' (to make the play more hot and fun) when you happen to be online at the same time - and no doubt playing with others when you aren't and they are online at the same time he is - and, most important, getting on with his life and only being online when he has time to be online. He has no interest in real ownership, only in cyber play. And the second one - IS IN TURKEY! 'nough said.

Do the same - if you like and enjoy cyber play, find someone to play with when you have time to get offline, but don't confuse pixels with ownership. GET OFF LINE and persue a LIFE.

Oh, and go to a munch. You will like it there. they have food.

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Post #: 48

RE: Im screwed - 3/9/2009 4:58:27 PM

DavanKael

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I do not say this with the intent to be mean, Mariel but perhaps you place your actions with your impulsive feelings too quickly or easily without the context of trust.
Davan

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Post #: 49