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My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 2:50:42 PM

LadyDread

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/16/2008
Status: offline

I'm 22 according to the parameters of time set forth by humans.

I believe life is all about learning and growing, no matter what your age, but I do not think it is wrong to have opinions formed through our own very personal experiences. I often receive rude emails (mostly from Dominants) that are mostly within the realm of name-calling (so very mature). They usually go something like this:

"You're only 22? Stop acting like you have life figured out, you're just a brat trying to get attention."

Now, if any of these fine people had read my profile, they would realize that the only things I have even half figured out are things about myself, I never claimed to be a Goddess among mere mortals or better than anyone. God forbid a child of 22 years old ever write any sort of independent thought! I write journals when I feel something very strongly and I'll never apologize for that.

So, basically what I'm trying to get at is this: I wish people would stop basing so many of their opinions of other people on a superficial thing like how many years they've been on this planet. I know children who have been through more than I could ever fathom experiencing. The human mind is fragile, but oh so strong in other ways, it's fascinating really. Wisdom is a result of experience, and experience is not ruled by time.

Thanks for listening!

Post #: 1

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 3:02:33 PM

meatling

Posts: 9
Joined: 6/14/2008
Status: offline

Sweetheart, I could not agree with you more! However, one must accept that some people are stuck in a way of thinking that we were all brought up in. That being, wisdom comes with age/time. It takes a strong will and an intelligent mind to break the stereotypes, that were raised to believe, and not everyone in that mindset or place to do so. Some never will be. That being said, no one knows you, and therefore no one should be able to tell you that you are too young to know anything. I am sure that you have lived a full rich life, and no one can take that away from you. When you get upset by their stupidity/ignorance than you are letting then do just that...take that away from you. Be happy in yourself and the knowledge you have learned thus far. Also remember we are NEVER done learning and growing. Well enough from me. That is just my perspective on the issue.

_____________________________

*kneeling patiently at your feet*

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 2

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 3:03:32 PM

VanessaChaland

Posts: 362
Joined: 11/23/2008
Status: offline

One characteristic that oddly seems very prevalant within the "S/M" world is a very high level of narcissism and egotism. From both genders, of any variation and/or persuasion within the community or lifestyle. And far too often some people confuse their "power" that comes from roleplay into a sense of "know all and be all" in other areas of life.

At the same time, while everyone should express their opinions and have independant thought, whatever knowledge and experience you have accumulated thus far in life will pale in comparison by the time your age is doubled, and tripled. You will look back and think that many of your ideals and notions were foolish, which everyone does so thats not a reflection on you on a personal level.

I have been bad mouthed, harrassed, mocked, attacked since the first day I bought a computer and went to a forum or posted something on a site. So what? Just live your life and don't worry about what others think and say. There are 6 Billion people on this planet, most will never agree with you nor like you (were it that you were ever to meet most, lol) Its not a popularity contest, sooo ,,,, "Screw em". :)

_____________________________

If you want to know more about me and my interests, Google my name.

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 3

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 3:12:03 PM

Prinsexx

Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

Deckard: Rachael? Rachael? Rachael? [Deckard cautionly walks in with gun in hand... finds rachel in bed covered with bedsheet... uncovers the sheet from Rachael's face and kisses her forehead. Deckard thought Rachel was dead.]
Deckard: Do you love me?
Rachael: I love you.
Deckard: Then trust me.
Rachael: I trust you. [Both Deckard and Rachel leave his apartment.]
Deckard: Rachael? [Rachel goes by a origami and toward elevator... Deckard guards Rachel by looking for any danger... he picks up the paperfoil unicorn origami.]
Gaff (memory): It's too bad she won't live. But then again, who does?
Deckard (voice-over): Gaff had been there, and let her live. Four years, he figured. He was wrong. Tyrell had told me Rachael was special: no termination date. I didn't know how long we had together, who does? [Elevator door closes.]......the last few moments of Blade Runner

I always wanted to be Rachel........

_____________________________

Owner of asterion

Metawhore.... the sound of a metaphore when gagged
Free woman
Resident thread finisher
To my stalker:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN2lP_7J7GI&feature=fvwrel

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 4

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 3:25:49 PM

LadyDread

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/16/2008
Status: offline

Vanessa, how right you are, I know that I will grow much more in life and I cherish that thought! And thanks ladies for the support and thoughts, they are always and ever appreciated.

~Gabrielle~

(in reply to Prinsexx)

Post #: 5

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 3:37:45 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Gabrielle, I adore younger people. Especially those rare special younger people that have that old soul quality without the nasty cynicism and arrogance that sometimes comes with being older. Younger people make me smile with their enthusiasm.

The very best thing you can do to get past the stupidity is to behave in a manner that creates what you want. Basically, don't let them make you lose control and act like a petulant child. That only reinforces their mindset. Acknowledge that no matter how old or young you are, there is a lot you don't know. Stay open to that learning process. I try to follow these ideas myself, even at my ripe old age of 46almost47. It makes life one hell of a lot easier.

And welcome!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 6

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 3:59:06 PM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

Here are my two cents...You are a kid. You profile sounds like it was written by someone lacking maturity or possibly much experience in dealing with others. You are promoting yourself as a Pro Domme in your profile and are searching for dollars.

This is not a bad business ploy to attract people towards your profile and to hopefully open up their wallets.

If you are as bright and intelligent as you say you are I hope you find a better career choice. I think you will be happier in the long run pursuing something that truly brings your soul contentment.

You are attractive and you should have no problem drumming up men.

_____________________________

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 7

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 4:02:44 PM

kaleidoscopeeyes

Posts: 7
Joined: 1/28/2009
Status: offline

I completely agree with this post! For some reason whenever I receive a message from the other side, it's always from some Dominant treating me like a toddler. I don't get called a brat, but I do get a lot of condescending "ohhhh poor you, you need someone to show you the ways of life" remarks. Or "oh you poor defenseless thing, you need someone to protect you from all the big bad scary predators out there". Um, what? Just because I'm 19 doesn't mean I can't stand my ground, and it sure as hell doesn't mean I don't know anything about life. There's a lot I don't know, but I bet there's a lot they don't know too.

We all have things we can learn from each other no matter what our age is. I wish more people would realize that.

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 8

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 4:06:38 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Damn I missed the profile in its original state.
However anybody of whatever age who writes another just to complain is being rude.
Anybody who starts a post just to complain about those who write is a whiner. So I guess it all evens out in the end.

When you grow older and have more experience in this life, you will learn that there are people who love to complain about others. It does no good to complain about them except to put yourself in the same class. There are more productive things to do than bewail your email. So go do them.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 9

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 4:48:24 PM

FoundDragon

Posts: 1
Joined: 1/21/2009
Status: offline

Age is a number, a measure of time lived... Contrary to popular belief, it is not a measure or indication of maturity, knowledge, or wisdom.

I've met people in their 30s and 40s that patrol the CM website just looking for slaves to collar with "GIVE ME YOUR ADDY AND I'LL CUM COLLAR YOU!"
And that's that.

I've met people just starting out in their adult life, 18s and 19s, that have more sense than a lot of the older people I come across.

I'm 27 myself, and by no means perfect, but I'm happy with myself, and with the knowledge I have gained, and hopeful of the knowledge I still look forward to gaining.

And, while yes, there are pleanty that do fit the 'stereotype' of age=maturity, there are also pleanty that break it.

And yes, for those out there that still maintain that 'You're just a child, you have no clue'... you've stepped foot into a stereotype... and aren't we, as a people who are already looked down upon by the unknowledgable, already stereotyped ourselves? And so many people work to fight that, to open people up to the knowledge that we (in general) do this consentually, it's a pleasure, etc etc. Then some of us end up turning around and falling into our own stereotyped ideals. We judge, fuss, yell, scream... and then get upset when someone tries to defend themself against that view.

People, a person is a person, they have their own thoughts and feelings, and just because one person portrays themself one way, doesn't mean everyone that has a relation to it does the same. Age is a number, deal with it. If you think it's a measure of maturity, why are there sexual harrassment laws to protect people in the work environment? Shouldn't people of working age be beyond acting immature?

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 10

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 5:12:55 PM

amativedame

Posts: 331
Joined: 9/23/2005
Status: offline

quote:

LadyDread

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Damn I missed the profile in its original state.
However anybody of whatever age who writes another just to complain is being rude.
Anybody who starts a post just to complain about those who write is a whiner. So I guess it all evens out in the end.

When you grow older and have more experience in this life, you will learn that there are people who love to complain about others. It does no good to complain about them except to put yourself in the same class. There are more productive things to do than bewail your email. So go do them.

I really have to agree with this one. So much of everything has to do with how one presents themselves... I'm certainly no older then the OP and I have never encountered this problem. Are there people who pass me over because of my age? I have no doubts! But have I never had someone come up to me and tell me they have issues with my age in either conversation or as an opening argument.

Ageism exists. We can always hope for a world where it doesn't exist but that is never going to happen. There will always be people who have issues or prejudice against certain age groups... all of them. Why waste time stressing about it? Brush it off as differences in opinion and move on, because dwelling about it or letting it bother you is going to do nothing but let you waste time and energy.

There will always be people who disagree or have differences in perspective. Just learn from it and move on.

< Message edited by amativedame -- 3/13/2009 5:35:37 PM >

_____________________________

Always remember that great love and great achievements both involve great risk.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 11

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 5:17:02 PM

OrionTheWolf

Posts: 7803
Joined: 10/11/2006
Status: offline

When I was 22 I felt the same way. I believe it is part of being in that age area. Age equates to time living, which equates to the ability to have more experience. This is why when hiring for a job they state a minimum amount of experience. So age is not superficial, it is often very relevant. There are exceptions to all generalities though.

Now that being said, age should not be the sole determining factor on whether someone is wise or not, whether they have knowledge or not. If you are getting messages stating that people perceive your profile a certain way, then reword your profile to alter the perception. The substance can stay the same, but there are many ways to say something.

Your post does come across as if you are whining about it though.

There is an old Chinese saying " A wise man says he is not wise, and those that say they are wise are not."

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyDread

So, basically what I'm trying to get at is this: I wish people would stop basing so many of their opinions of other people on a superficial thing like how many years they've been on this planet. I know children who have been through more than I could ever fathom experiencing. The human mind is fragile, but oh so strong in other ways, it's fascinating really. Wisdom is a result of experience, and experience is not ruled by time.

Thanks for listening!

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 12

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 5:18:29 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyDread

I'm 22 according to the parameters of time set forth by humans.

I believe life is all about learning and growing, no matter what your age, but I do not think it is wrong to have opinions formed through our own very personal experiences. I often receive rude emails (mostly from Dominants) that are mostly within the realm of name-calling (so very mature). They usually go something like this:

"You're only 22? Stop acting like you have life figured out, you're just a brat trying to get attention."

Now, if any of these fine people had read my profile, they would realize that the only things I have even half figured out are things about myself, I never claimed to be a Goddess among mere mortals or better than anyone. God forbid a child of 22 years old ever write any sort of independent thought! I write journals when I feel something very strongly and I'll never apologize for that.

So, basically what I'm trying to get at is this: I wish people would stop basing so many of their opinions of other people on a superficial thing like how many years they've been on this planet. I know children who have been through more than I could ever fathom experiencing. The human mind is fragile, but oh so strong in other ways, it's fascinating really. Wisdom is a result of experience, and experience is not ruled by time.

Thanks for listening!

I remember being 22...indignation, desire to be heard, making my mark...all that.

I just want to tell you honey...at 50....I'd fuck you...and to hell with what anyone else thinks.

(But then, I'm a giver).

$0.02.

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 13

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 6:15:01 PM

catize

Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline

quote:

I wish people would stop

As your example of the emails you get shows, age has little to do with maturity.
One thing alone is not a total definition of who we are. But make no mistake; age defines a part of us, as does gender and race. Age is a more fluid factor but unfortunately, it only flows in one direction.
Tomorrow, next year, in a decade; your age will be a partial definition of a different ‘you’.
Don’t waste what time you have wishing other people would change. It isn’t gonna happen.

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 14

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 7:55:55 PM

WestBaySlave

Posts: 501
Joined: 9/24/2008
Status: offline

Commenting on the content of the post rather the OP ( I didn't see the older profile anyhow )...

People do judge based on age, often unfairly, sometimes accurately, but I do think it's impolite to do so to a stranger.

I think my favorite interchange of this type was a man who wrote and complimented me on how mature I was for my age, and then, when I politely said I wasn't interested in hooking up with him, I received an angry email about how I was really not very mature at all and a message that he'd blocked me. The whole interchange told me more about him than me...

That being said, I do judge somewhat based on experience, but a twenty-two-year-old who's been involved in the scene for four years can often be far more informed and experienced than a fifty-year-old fresh to the scene.

(in reply to catize)

Post #: 15

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 8:04:34 PM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

I wish people would stop basing so many of their opinions of other people on a superficial thing like how many years they've been on this planet

Well, people like to put things in boxes, so they can see where they belong. I used to tell my Helpdesk staff: "Don't mock the morons, it is because of them you have a job". And so, when they put you down, you know instantly who not to hang out with, or trust, and your life becomes much easier. No?

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 16

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 8:09:40 PM

ExKat

Posts: 300
Joined: 8/25/2008
Status: offline

"I wish people would stop basing so many of their opinions of other people on a superficial thing like how many years they've been on this planet."

Someone's age directly relates to the amount of things they have experienced. Although there are rare 22-year-olds who have experienced a lot of life and show good judgment in tough situations, the vast majority of 22-year-olds have not experienced all that much. Most 40-year-olds have twice the experience as someone who is 20...that's not superficiality, that's math. Don't get worked up over it now...I've heard that math only get harder to live with when age starts to show.

_____________________________

~*~ The amalgam of Exquemelin and Katie978~*~
In the forums, it'll usually be Katie you're speaking to.
testing
"That's the plan/ Rule the world/ You and me/ Anyday ::wink::"

(in reply to antipode)

Post #: 17

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 8:23:27 PM

Juliannadelion

Posts: 869
Joined: 7/25/2008
From: circusofthedamned
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyDread

I'm 22 according to the parameters of time set forth by humans.

I believe life is all about learning and growing, no matter what your age, but I do not think it is wrong to have opinions formed through our own very personal experiences. I often receive rude emails (mostly from Dominants) that are mostly within the realm of name-calling (so very mature). They usually go something like this:

"You're only 22? Stop acting like you have life figured out, you're just a brat trying to get attention."

Now, if any of these fine people had read my profile, they would realize that the only things I have even half figured out are things about myself, I never claimed to be a Goddess among mere mortals or better than anyone. God forbid a child of 22 years old ever write any sort of independent thought! I write journals when I feel something very strongly and I'll never apologize for that.

So, basically what I'm trying to get at is this: I wish people would stop basing so many of their opinions of other people on a superficial thing like how many years they've been on this planet. I know children who have been through more than I could ever fathom experiencing. The human mind is fragile, but oh so strong in other ways, it's fascinating really. Wisdom is a result of experience, and experience is not ruled by time.

Thanks for listening!

Ah, dear LadyDread - people suck sweetness!! You get it for being too young - I get it for being too OLD!!! No one over 30!!! screams the profile. I smile. And thank my lucky stars that I found a Master so precious to me as mine - and he is only 22.

Everyone is different, and people that aren't going to take the time to get to know you based on your age, are really probably not the ones for you anyway.

You appear to be beautiful, intelligent, fun - fuck 'em if they write you and show you how ignorant they really are. I am sure you will find something much more interesting to do than worrying about them.

I wish you the very best of luck in your pursuits - with a wish to not worry what others think - except those that find you and love you.

_____________________________

Do you think this kind of love happens every day? ~ Asher

Bonded by blood, bound to His soul, soon to be his wife, owned by AsherDeLampyr

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 18

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 8:45:03 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Your profile says you're 21.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyDread

I'm 22 according to the parameters of time set forth by humans.

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 19

RE: My age does not define me. - 3/13/2009 9:18:11 PM

tazzygirl

Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline

age is just a number... its also an indicator of your possible experience. ie: your profile states you are thinking about engaging in scenes, i already have, numerous times. as have many here. its not a bad thing to be young, and thought of as nieve and immature. girl! if i knew at your age what i know now...lol.

instead of railing against it, learn to use it to your advantage. be thankful these dominants see you in that light. do you really want to be with soneone who quickly judges?

think smart! who cares what someone you have not met, and probably never will meet, thinks about you?

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to LadyDread)

Post #: 20

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