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RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:17:41 AM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline

i got $20 says you expected me to jump in here and say thank you...didntcha.?

_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to la90066)

Post #: 41

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:21:00 AM

la90066

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: veronicaofML

i got $20 says you expected me to jump in here and say thank you...didntcha.?

You'd lose that bet... Sorry, didn't expect ANYTHING in return for the compliment. (GASP?!!)

(in reply to veronicaofML)

Post #: 42

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:21:25 AM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: knees2you

Hello there.

Was just wandering what types of Rewards
Do You as Masters, Mistresses, and Switches
give to Your Subs/Slaves
for good Behavior?

I actually got a chance to choose..

Good behavior is expected of my subs. I don't reward anyone for doing what's expected of them. I do recognize good behavior. If a sub is only doing what's expected of him in order to get something from me, no matter what it is, I consider that to be unacceptable behavior (topping from the bottom). I do whatever needs to be done to discourage bad behavior.

_____________________________

Tress

"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

(in reply to knees2you)

Post #: 43

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:25:11 AM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline

I do whatever needs to be done to discourage bad behavior.
==========

i am curious

what do YOU ...CALL.......bad..............behavior?
having their own opinions and feelings and voicing them? sticking up for their morals, principles and convictions?
being able to tell YOU when they think You are doing something that may be labeled as You being used?

telling You something for Your own good?

using, tough-love?

what IS bad to YOU?

please? i really need to know.
thanks

_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to yourMissTress)

Post #: 44

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:26:54 AM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline

You'd lose that bet... Sorry, didn't expect ANYTHING in return for the compliment. (GASP?!!)

=========
then WHY are you "gasping?"
did i shock you?
evidently you expected...something .....other than what i said,...huh?
you did have..........at least...'a' expectation, didntcha?

_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to la90066)

Post #: 45

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:35:49 AM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: veronicaofML

I do whatever needs to be done to discourage bad behavior.
==========

i am curious

what do YOU ...CALL.......bad..............behavior?
having their own opinions and feelings and voicing them? sticking up for their morals, principles and convictions?
being able to tell YOU when they think You are doing something that may be labeled as You being used?

telling You something for Your own good?

using, tough-love?

what IS bad to YOU?

please? i really need to know.
thanks

Bad behavior to me is disobeying an order, constantly being tardy, not following through with assignments on a regular basis and things of that nature.

I don't know if you've not paid any attention to my previous posts or simply gotten the wrong impression of me, but I would not consider anyone being truthful and honest with me bad behavior. I absolutely encourage free exchange of ideas and prefer a sub with a mind of his own. I enjoy a spirited debate with an intelligent person and like to surround myself with just such people.

< Message edited by yourMissTress -- 1/28/2006 11:37:07 AM >

_____________________________

Tress

"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

(in reply to veronicaofML)

Post #: 46

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:36:18 AM

la90066

Posts: 177
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: veronicaofML

You'd lose that bet... Sorry, didn't expect ANYTHING in return for the compliment. (GASP?!!)

=========
then WHY are you "gasping?"
did i shock you?
evidently you expected...something .....other than what i said,...huh?
you did have..........at least...'a' expectation, didntcha?

The "Gasp" was YOU -- not believing I didn't (and still don't) expect anything in return for the compliment. As in, "GASP... Ok, I guess he really didn't expect anything in return?!!"

Anyway, on with the rest of the thread... I expect nothing from you -- really!

(in reply to veronicaofML)

Post #: 47

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 11:39:49 AM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline

not paid any attention to my previous posts !

-------

i dont follow people around and be nosy.
and thanks for Your answer!

_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to yourMissTress)

Post #: 48

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 12:11:08 PM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline

for all here------

tell ya what

if you ever;;; do anything for anyone...and then throw it back in their face later...then ya didnt give em...anything.

all too often have i seen someone say.. i did such n such for you.......
so like, whats the deal? ya want it back?

like people talk about...the GIFT of submission

it aint no gift if ya throw things back in someone's face, is it?

"I" personally abhore anyone using the word..gift.

mostly i find there are always strings attached..............
i caught my Mistress here, playing guilt trips recently........and i told Her to Her face,...dont be doing that shit..i coulda stayed with my ex wives if i wanted childish games.

aint no gift if it means ya want something out of it.

take care everyone

< Message edited by veronicaofML -- 1/28/2006 12:13:58 PM >

_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to veronicaofML)

Post #: 49

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 1/28/2006 12:24:48 PM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: veronicaofML

if you ever;;; do anything for anyone...and then throw it back in their face later...then ya didnt give em...anything.

all too often have i seen someone say.. i did such n such for you.......
so like, whats the deal? ya want it back?

like people talk about...the GIFT of submission

it aint no gift if ya throw things back in someone's face, is it?

aint no gift if it means ya want something out of it.

I couldn't agree more. The other side of the coin is those who "Give" you things and later when they are pissed of or leavig you take thir gifts back. Those "Gifts" were never yours, they were secretly on loan. Mate of mine when he and his wife broke up found that she had left him only with things he brought into the marriage including his clothes and took his computer she gave him for his birthday along with several suits she bought him.. It pissed him right off when he saw her new man wearing them....

Back to the OP>>>>>> Slaves usually dont expect rewards. If a girl of mine does something particularly well and I wish to reward her I'll do something which she loves as a reward. perhaps a good flogging session or something appropriate. Mind you, I love spoiling slaves at times and chocolates seems to work wonders too. However in more mundane areas, I make additional time when she can be phycically close to me.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to veronicaofML)

Post #: 50

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 2/6/2006 1:34:15 PM

Sirandlittle1

Posts: 538
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline

Rewards, oh yeah, they came thick and fast this last weekend, which was my birthday. For which, i was taken camping.
The rewards started the night before, the organising and booking, packing - all done so that i didnt have to worry about a thing.
Special 'treats' like fetching my drinks, cooking my favourite meals, dancing to the tunes i liked at a concert, being ravaged in a tent in ways id fantasised over, coming swimming in freezing cold water cause 'i' wanted to. My whim's were indulged, my every fancy addressed.
In my family, your birthday is where you get to be 'king', 'queen' or 'princess' for the day.
Despite being the submissive, 'i' was 'queen' for the day. I loved it. It showed how much attn to detail he takes in. Showed how well he knew me, showed how much he cares.
Rewards are a wonderful influence in a D/s relationship.

Change the word reward to re-inforcer and you have a massive motivating force on your hands, you'd be foolish not to harness this force.

A happy submissive, is a devoted submissive.

little1

(in reply to IronBear)

Post #: 51

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 2/6/2006 1:55:03 PM

seaturtle50

Posts: 382
Joined: 12/28/2005
Status: offline

quote:

"I" personally abhore anyone using the word..gift.

i don't know that the word has no place, even in a D/s. To me a gift is an "unmerited favor" - in this way i (as the receiver) did nothing to deserve it, and cannot do anything to disqualify myself from it. It is unmerited. It is all about the whim or decision of the giver.

So, i can see where i could give the gift of my submission - although in most relationships it would really just be my giving myself, and that submission being a facet of who i am. A facet that touches every aspect of who i am, but just one facet none the less.

Could i or would i give myself as an unmerited favor to another? Well, that in itself is likely a new topic, and something interesting to think about at the least, and i can in fact readily think of instances where that could be possible

Just because one may receive ancillary benefits from the giving of a gift (such as the good feelings that may come from helping a homeless person in some way) does not make it less of a gift – less of an unmerited favor.

st50

_____________________________

i want to be your ... #1 lowest common denominator.

Destiny happens in a moment ... in the blink of an eye.

(in reply to Sirandlittle1)

Post #: 52

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 2/6/2006 4:01:40 PM

sweetnessforsir

Posts: 70
Joined: 1/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: veronicaofML

there are MANY subs who would view giving foot rubs as the ultimate in satisfaction.

I love giving foot rubs . . . and hand massages . . . and watching as He relaxes . . . and yes, His sweet relaxed smile is a reward.

(in reply to veronicaofML)

Post #: 53

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 2/6/2006 4:12:45 PM

Sensualips

Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

In the winter this includes heated baked goods (muffins) troughed in butter, hot cocoa, chocolate sundaes, buying new music, crab cake dinners, and ordering pizza instead of making dinner. (I guess I'm a food slut.)

Cloudboy and I have a commonality!

(in reply to cloudboy)

Post #: 54

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 2/6/2006 7:34:13 PM

typesgirl

Posts: 102
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline

I totally understand the position of those of you who have said that you don't expect rewards for doing what you've committed to do....serve and please.

O/our relationship is a bit different. I get rewards on days when I do really well at what I do. Not just for Him but for myself. When I push hard and work hard Master is always there to say good job and give me a little something whether it's a scene, a present, or just those ever-so-lovely pets I get at bed time. it's the little things He does that show me He's proud of me and make me work even harder the next day to please Him more and be the best me I can be.
typesgirl

(in reply to Sensualips)

Post #: 55

RE: Rewards For Good Bdsm Behavior. - 2/12/2006 12:05:27 PM

artglfr

Posts: 235
Joined: 4/8/2005
Status: offline

I am happy , she is happy it is that simple and since I am usually happy she may be allowed the use of the "O" she graciously gave me control of.

(in reply to Petruchio)

Post #: 56

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