April Fool's Jokes

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

April Fool's Jokes

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> April Fool's Jokes

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 6:58:19 AM

Sanity

Posts: 22039
Joined: 6/14/2006
From: Nampa, Idaho USA
Status: offline

I went to a local "Joker's Wild" store yesterday and I bought some drink gel for a relative's nightly glass of milk, to be served with that person's dinner. The milk gels instantly... hopefully that will be fun. The local newspaper had a few ideas for tomorrow in this mornings edition, including gluing quarters to the concrete step or patio floor, changing clock times and alarm clock times, or putting a rubber band on the trigger of the sink sprayer and leave it facing forward.

I'd like to hear some other ideas though, because there are more than a few people who I owe... so lay it on me. What are your best April Fool's gags? Or share any April Fool's stories that you might have. This could be fun!

_____________________________

Inside Every Liberal Is A Totalitarian Screaming To Get Out

Post #: 1

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 7:05:21 AM

kittinSol

Posts: 16926
Status: offline

There's a story in the Guardian online today that the British government is backing the future installation of surveillance boxes inside new cars to track drivers throughout Europe. April Fool's, or reality :-) ?

_____________________________

(in reply to Sanity)

Post #: 2

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 7:39:30 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

A dime fits perfectly as a cap on a shower head. Unscrew the head, put dime on the pipe put the top back on - VERY difficult to figure out.
Take the bar of soap in the shower and coat it with clear nail polish. They won't generate a bubble.
Shoe polish, paste version, on the back of any doorknob; don't use too much and they won't feel it. Unseen and messy, for an added bonus, tell the victim they have something on their face after opening the door.
With the 'right' type of drawers, you can remove them, put a thick piece of cardboard or hard plastic on top, turn them upside-down, put them back in on the track, remove the temporary lid and wait.
Go into the sock drawer and switch out every pair with a mismatched color and/or length. For added foot focus, fill the toes of shoes with some shaving cream.
Unscrew but don't remove every light bulb.
Next up breakfast, in a multi cereal household, switch the bags from inside the boxes.
Make up a few caramel/nut coated onions as a 'treat' to send with them to work or school.
Cellophane on the top of the toilet is a fun way to start they day. Depending on the organization of the victim, removing every piece of paper in the bathroom and towels, adding to the shower and soap trick, and you have a perfect way to start the day on April 1.

Of course, those were tricks of my youth. A couple of years ago I staged an acquisition and sent out a detailed memo to my department managers advising them that they were enrolled and scheduled to report, to a total immersion Hindi language school starting tomorrow. I said I acquired a India based 'help center' and was going to off-source all customer service. I told them they would have to live in Delhi at first, but told them I wanted included in their business plan a relocation of the operation to a more remote area to cut down on salary and overhead expenses. I said that the acquired company's $5/week base salary for a 6 day 12 hour workweek, could be cut in half by relocating to a more remote area. I suggested that the 'BEST' manager would have the "opportunity" of permanent relocation. They were told to read the entire memo and provide me with a detailed business plan by the end of the day, including who should be considered to replace them. The bottom of the memo, dated April 1, said 'Carpe Diem'.

I can't disclose tomorrow's plans!

Oh yeah, I forgot one of my favorites. Take an old leash and attach it to the back bumper. For added effect, put a little ground meat and fur around the harness collar, and then drive past a few people in the 'Pets Mart' or 'Petco' parking lots.

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 3/31/2009 7:56:36 AM >

(in reply to Sanity)

Post #: 3

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 7:40:02 AM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

I think the best April Fool's joke i ever played was to play no joke at all. I used to have a young employee, sort of a protege really, with whom I worked closely and developed a very close relationship. He was a really good kid, and we used to joke around a lot. I had a reputation in my office as being quite a practical joker, and as the day came closer Kevin became more and more apprehensive about what I was going to do to him on the 1st. I had a couple of ideas in mind, but the more nervous he seemed about what I was going to do, the more I started to think it was more fun just to string him along.

So I didn't do anything at all. Every time he brought it up, I'd just give an evil chuckle and say, "Oh, well, you know how it is. I'm sure I'll think of something." When he came to work on the 1st, he looked nervous as a cat on a skateboard. And i didn't do a thing except smile sweetly when he walked past my office, which of course only convinced him I had to be up to something really diabolical. About every half hour or so, I'd walk out to his desk and just stand there behind him until he noticed me. He'd jump halfway out of his chair, and I'd just say, "Hi. How's everything going today?" with a big grin.

"Uh.... fine.... so far."

"Good! Glad to hear it! Your, uh... computer working alright?"

And then I'd just clap him the shoulder and go back to my office while he spent the next hour frantically obsessing about what might be going on with his computer. Then I'd go out and say, "So, how's the phone working today? Any problems with your phone?" He'd come back from lunch, and I'd go out and ask him, "Say, how's your chair? Is it comfortable?" And then he'd spend the next hour tensed up waiting for his chair to collapse out from under him. I kept it going all day; drove the poor kid nuts. He finally figured it out about halfway through the afternoon, but up until that point the whole office was in stitches because they all knew what was going on. They kept looking at him and snickering, which only made him more paranoid. That wasn't the best prank I've ever played overall, but it's probably the best April Fool's joke I've ever pulled.

_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?

(in reply to kittinSol)

Post #: 4

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 8:01:05 AM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

Oh, I thought of another one. In 2003, I "forwarded" an e-mail (complete with fake headers showing that it was from the Department of Homeland Security) to everyone in my office informing them that by Executive Order, April Fool's day was canceled that year. The e-mail said that reliable intelligence sources reported there was a possibility that Al Qeada was planning to commit a series of terrorist attacks across the United States masquerading as April Fool's jokes, and in order to avoid confusion, all pranks, jokes, and shenanigans were banned until April 2nd. I signed the fake e-mail "Special Agent Wolf", and included the phone number for the Minnesota Zoo. Of course, since I was the one who forwarded the e-mail, everyone was a little suspicious of it, so it only took about a half hour for one of my employees to call up the zoo and ask to speak with Special Agent Wolf.

God, I'm really regretting quitting my job last year. I don't have anyone to fuck with tomorrow!

_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 5

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 8:14:08 AM

Owner59

Posts: 17033
Joined: 3/14/2006
From: Dirty Jersey
Status: offline

You could put an 'Obama' bumper sticker on your vehicle....if only for that day.

Humor needs a hard basis to get any traction...

< Message edited by Owner59 -- 3/31/2009 8:15:02 AM >

_____________________________

"As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals"

President Obama

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 6

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 8:19:21 AM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

I see tons of cars every day that still have Obama stickers on them, so that probably wouldn't make a very good prank.

_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?

(in reply to Owner59)

Post #: 7

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 8:31:05 AM

Owner59

Posts: 17033
Joined: 3/14/2006
From: Dirty Jersey
Status: offline

It`s a context thing.....

Sanity will explain....

_____________________________

"As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals"

President Obama

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 8

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 8:35:40 AM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner59

It`s a context thing.....

Sanity will explain....

Sanity's going to explain your post for you?

Right. Got it.

_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?

(in reply to Owner59)

Post #: 9

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 8:35:50 AM

MsFlutter

Posts: 1305
Joined: 11/12/2008
From: East Coast
Status: offline

Hide a spool of thread in your pocket, run the end of it out thru the weave of the knit and drape it across some part of the sweater. Inevitably, a well-meaning soul will say 'You have a string on your sweater - let me get that for you'....

_____________________________

'Dont torture yourself, Gomez darling. That's my job' Morticia Addams

"The right data, filtered through an idiot, can yield a bad answer." einstien5201

(in reply to Owner59)

Post #: 10

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 8:53:38 AM

Owner59

Posts: 17033
Joined: 3/14/2006
From: Dirty Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDamnedPanda

quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner59

It`s a context thing.....

Sanity will explain....

Sanity's going to explain your post for you?

Right. Got it.

It would be like george bush sporting an Obama bumper sticker.

_____________________________

"As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals"

President Obama

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 11

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 9:01:40 AM

ThatDamnedPanda

Posts: 6060
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner59

quote:

ORIGINAL: ThatDamnedPanda

quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner59

It`s a context thing.....

Sanity will explain....

Sanity's going to explain your post for you?

Right. Got it.

It would be like george bush sporting an Obama bumper sticker.

Oh, OK. But considering that I voted for, and support, President Obama, I don't think you're getting me any closer to seeing the humor in this idea. I'm getting your general point now, but not seeing the applicability in this instance. I suppose a McCain/Palin sticker would work, but then I'd be the one driving around with a McCain/Palin sticker on my car, and the joke would be on me.

_____________________________

Panda, panda, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Made you all black and white and roly-poly like that?

(in reply to Owner59)

Post #: 12

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 9:11:30 AM

aravain

Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline

~FR~

I hate April Fools day :\ I don't like pulling pranks, and I don't like having pranks pulled on me (guess my sadomasochism doesn't go quite that far), especially because I don't *like* being frightened, and this seems to be the emotion that anyone ever seems to be interested in with their 'jokes' on people.

The last person that tried to prank me I made cry because how what I said/how I yelled.

< Message edited by aravain -- 3/31/2009 9:12:55 AM >

(in reply to ThatDamnedPanda)

Post #: 13

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 10:13:38 AM

UncleNasty

Posts: 1108
Joined: 3/20/2004
Status: offline

Your most viscious side shows Merc.

I used to make calls, or have friends make calls, to other friends claiming to be an IRS auditor seeking to schedule a convenient time to audit.

Uncle Nasty

(in reply to aravain)

Post #: 14

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 10:40:27 AM

kittinSol

Posts: 16926
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UncleNasty

Your most viscious side shows Merc.

Did you mean 'viscous', or 'vicious' lol?

_____________________________

(in reply to UncleNasty)

Post #: 15

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 10:44:19 AM

UncleNasty

Posts: 1108
Joined: 3/20/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

quote:

ORIGINAL: UncleNasty

Your most viscious side shows Merc.

Did you mean 'viscous', or 'vicious' lol?

Yes.

Uncle Nasty

(in reply to kittinSol)

Post #: 16

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 10:47:18 AM

philosophy

Posts: 5284
Joined: 2/15/2004
Status: offline

FR

Best
April Fools Joke
Ever

http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/hoax/Hoaxipedia/Swiss_Spaghetti_Harvest/

(in reply to UncleNasty)

Post #: 17

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 10:51:41 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

I plan on leaving a note saying I QUIT!!!! on my desk and staying home from work tomorrow.

Unfortunately I am not a masochist and with all the crying phone messages I would have, on my phone, from the boss, I would be tormenting myself also.

Plan B

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Sanity)

Post #: 18

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 10:56:31 AM

hizgeorgiapeach

Posts: 1672
Status: offline

Ouch, UM - that's harsh even for you!

I've got a few things in mind for tomorrow - not so much against friends, or dad, as to pull on the Hospice Aide when she comes to give dad his shower and the Nurse when she comes by to check on him. I'm thinking of meeting the nurse at the door with big aligator tears in my eyes (yes, I can cry on demand as part of an act, although I don't generally cry when I get upset) to tell her that he's died between when the aide showed up and when she got here.

Perhaps call my idiot brother and tell him that the cops have found the harley that he managed to get stolen, then when he asks for the location tell him "April Fools." (that's sure to piss him off, but personally I think it'd be a hoot to get his hopes up.)

_____________________________

Rhi
Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Essential Scentsations

(in reply to UncleNasty)

Post #: 19

RE: April Fool's Jokes - 3/31/2009 11:08:14 AM

kittinSol

Posts: 16926
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UncleNasty

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

quote:

ORIGINAL: UncleNasty

Your most viscious side shows Merc.

Did you mean 'viscous', or 'vicious' lol?

Yes.

Lapsus clavis.

_____________________________

(in reply to UncleNasty)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> April Fool's Jokes

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.094