RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (Full Version)

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LadyPact -> RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (4/12/2009 5:05:11 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

Just pack your bags divorce the husband and beat down the door at your dommely domm dom's house
it should turn him on enough[:-]



This was hilarious.  If the husband in this scenario has any sense, he'll help her pack.

How much do you want to bet the Dom's wife meets her at the door?




thishereboi -> RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (4/12/2009 6:35:26 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

Just pack your bags divorce the husband and beat down the door at your dommely domm dom's house
it should turn him on enough[:-]



Unless his wife answers the door, then he might not be turned on as much as expected.


to the op....You have a husband you can't talk to and an online dom who can't tell you what he wants. Sounds like you should be working on your own issues and worrying about turning on a man after you have worked them out.




Jeptha -> RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (4/12/2009 11:03:05 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: themystic
...I know every dom is different, and that I should ask him what he likes. I have asked, with unhelpful results. He told me that part of being a good submissive is to know what I want, and to express that clearly and directly.

Is this true?...

It might work in something like a kink romance novel.

It is an equivalent of saying; "...if you loved me, you'd just know....(whatever it is that I'm too much of a pussy to just come out and tell you.)

Maybe you can just tell him you have no idea what he likes and then venture some guesses and see if he picks up on any. The guesses can be anything: things you personally like, ridiculous things, etc.

Since he's not giving you any clues, why not cast a wide net and have fun with it.

That could be just me, though.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Takecharge13

I tried several online subs, but quickly grew bored as it seems they wanted me to do all the writing or they were not very expressive when it came to describing their emotions or reactions to my actions, which when I am writing them are detailed and thought out. ...

That's the obverse of what themystic describes. It can happen. If you aren't able to share anything, it appears that you really aren't making any effort, and that's not a good sign.




pinkwind -> RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (4/12/2009 3:46:29 PM)

i can remember, years ago, chatting to an online Dom who seemed to think a submissive should be a mind reader.

He took it really badly when i said that i had read his mind, and it was empty, a cavern, echoing.

No, a submissive isn't a mind reader, and just like any relationship there has to be frank and honest discussions and revelations about each others proclivities before anyone could turn on the other.

If this guy wants you to break out in a sweat to create wank fodder for him he could at least do you the kindness of letting you in to his treasury of fantasies to give you a starting point.

Sorry, i cannot take the attitude of some online Doms seriously. Some want everything handed to them on a platter without any effort on their own part. If they hadn't a pavlovian response to turn their pc on, some of them wouldn't even make it onto a kink site.









marysdream -> RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (4/12/2009 6:40:29 PM)

wow all kinds of negatives here..first you are dishonest, and only out for your own pleasure..so please do not insult the rest of us by calling yourself a sub! the on line thing which is a hard limit for me...seems appropriate for you..and your so called dom!...
[:@]




Jeptha -> RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (4/13/2009 10:14:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: pinkwind

i can remember, years ago, chatting to an online Dom who seemed to think a submissive should be a mind reader.

He took it really badly when i said that i had read his mind, and it was empty, a cavern, echoing. ...

Nice turns of phrase, pinkwind.

I agree. Have fun with it. If someone says "you *should* know", either go with what you know about that person (which if you think about it, you'll realize is next to nothing), or just begin speculating wildly, as would be commensurate with the expectation of the online taskmaster.




dmt -> RE: turning on my dom, online--tips? (4/14/2009 7:19:56 PM)

For the sake of argument, is he cheating on you? You say he disregards your wishes, does  he know what they mean? Maybe he needs an accurate description of what you're looking for from him.Without communication, no relationship actually exists,even a marriage.  I cannot condone the cheating even if I could understand the reasoning behind it...  Hell for all you know, without meeting this "On line Dom", he could be some kid saying to his friends "look What I can make this one do!" I think you want to weigh out your stakes in both situations here and see which one is most valuable to you.




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