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RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:20:09 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		edit

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 4/10/2009 1:22:48 PM >

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:24:12 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Lush,

you realize that you are now just as guilty of what you are speaking out about as you simply state "men" as if all of them behave the same way.

I do not believe that we do. However when everyone just assumes that all men are just going to do this and take it internally and do not speak up, and by that I mean speak up, not out. and tell the Cro-Magnum Knuckle Dragger to please refrain from that kind of behavior.

Depending on how what was typed was read I am sure some could assume that I was treating the situation in the other thread as trivial because it deals with women and I am a man and that wasn't the case however I am sure that there are people who thought that just because I have a penis that is what I am doing. To judge based on judgement and not on action is equally as offensive as to be guilty of the actions that were described because the only way to come away from it is to say "Fine you are Right and everyone else if wrong" or to deal with the little side attacks and snide comments that have been made since that thread was started. It would seem some people would rather be a Martyr to an action rathar than be open to a Thought.

It isn't until the end of your post that you use the word many and even then it seems you offer Many as escape where as before it was Men do this and woman are treated like this and then in the end you assume that "many" men see you as an object to be revered or a person to be reviled and I just don't see that as a reality. Lush I see you as a Person First, by the time I get to seeing the Submissive and the Gender there are so many more important things before that that it seems silly to write you off just for them at that point.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:24:16 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Perhaps others have not faced what I have. I was not seeking authority. Just to exist in the world without being demeaned. Let me tell you about the time I cried to my boss about the busboys in the restaurants hitting on me and how it was making me feel. What did he do about it? he planted a kiss on me.
Or the restaurant pizza joint wuith the drunken son of the owner. He let a customer choke me as a joke. I went to talk to the other son who dimissed me.  They even let him back to the restaurant.  I needed the money so I stayed. I hadto confront the man who put his hands on me myself.  But after the night that the drunken son slapped me acroos the face, I walked out and pressed charges. I went to the EEOC. The EEOC lost my paperwork and when i went to court the cook who witnessed it was their to stand as a witness against me and the police supervisor was there too as he was a friend and customer of theirs. This was downtown chicago.

So call me a whiner or a victim mentality. Likely you have never been in a position where no matter what you did justice would never prevail.



Likely you would be wrong.

However, I learned to deal with stuff myself instead of expecting others to do it for me.

"It would seem some people would rather be a Martyr to an action rathar than be open to a Thought. "

Excellent way of putting it Steel.


< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 4/10/2009 1:26:13 PM >

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:25:04 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Not all Steel, and maybe not you but many.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:26:33 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Perhaps others have not faced what I have. I was not seeking authority. Just to exist in the world without being demeaned. Let me tell you about the time I cried to my boss about the busboys in the restaurants hitting on me and how it was making me feel. What did he do about it? he planted a kiss on me.
Or the restaurant pizza joint wuith the drunken son of the owner. He let a customer choke me as a joke. I went to talk to the other son who dimissed me.  They even let him back to the restaurant.  I needed the money so I stayed. I hadto confront the man who put his hands on me myself.  But after the night that the drunken son slapped me acroos the face, I walked out and pressed charges. I went to the EEOC. The EEOC lost my paperwork and when i went to court the cook who witnessed it was their to stand as a witness against me and the police supervisor was there too as he was a friend and customer of theirs. This was downtown chicago.

So call me a whiner or a victim mentality. Likely you have never been in a position where no matter what you did justice would never prevail.



Likely you would be wrong.

However, I learned to deal with stuff myself instead of expecting others to do it for me.



We all deal with it. But this mentality is why so many dont report problems

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:35:45 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Apparently this conversation will continue to go round and round in circles, getting nowhere. Meanwhile the excuse book gets thicker.

I am sure if I felt it was important, I could shuffle back through my dusty memory and find all sorts of examples of male assholeness to cry about and use as an excuse for some personal problem. Old boss, exhusband, 20something yo cousin that thought I was bangworthy before I grew tits, some salesman here at the shop that prefers to talk to the male owner instead of me, and on and on.....I choose not to. I will NOT give those lame male specimen that power over me or my life. It really is as simple as that.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:38:11 PM   
twisteddoll


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/22/2008
Status: offline 		I feel like if I was going to be involved in a local group or community, I wouldn't want to like... have anything more than what this is, just in person.  A place to like, be able to talk about the things that you probably can't talk about with your "vanilla" friends cause they might look at you like you've lost your mind.  I feel like I would just want it to be a relaxed environment to be around like-minded people.  I wouldn't want to have to worry about, "Oh, do I have to submit to every dominant in the room?"  Because I sure as hell don't submit to every dominant on collarme.  

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:39:13 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Its funny. There have been dominant women here making a case for woman being authoritative and taking care of things or having a mans outlook or demeaner. Even a mention of hormones, which would typically be a below the belt hit from a man. But saying we shouldnt whine, be authorative etc, somehow to me translates to you must be dominant. So if I am not a "strong woman" then I should be preyed upon?  Because thats what happens. The stronger bullying types exert their authority over the weaker ones.

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 4/10/2009 1:40:33 PM >

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:42:08 PM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline 		party ooon dominant vs. submissive

btw I mentioned the hormones and I'm uh..uh..submissive well okay...almost..sub..missive.. definitely not dominant though

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:42:35 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Its funny. There have been dominat women here making a case for woman being authoritative and taking care of things or having a mans outlook or demeaner. Even a mention of hormones, which would typically be a below the belt hit from a man. But saying we shouldnt whine, be authorative etc, somehow to me translates to you must be dominant. So if I am not a "strong woman" then I should be preyed upon?  Because thats what happens. The stronger bullying types exert their authority over the weaker ones.


So you are saying that IF a woman is submissive.......she should get preferential treatment from all and sundry?

If so, it is rather counter productive to the whole argument of equality.


< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 4/10/2009 1:43:22 PM >

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:44:37 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Apparently this conversation will continue to go round and round in circles, getting nowhere. Meanwhile the excuse book gets thicker.

I am sure if I felt it was important, I could shuffle back through my dusty memory and find all sorts of examples of male assholeness to cry about and use as an excuse for some personal problem. Old boss, exhusband, 20something yo cousin that thought I was bangworthy before I grew tits, some salesman here at the shop that prefers to talk to the male owner instead of me, and on and on.....I choose not to. I will NOT give those lame male specimen that power over me or my life. It really is as simple as that.



Thast not what happening. Someone posted a thread asking about it. SO just because I am discussing it doesnt mean I whine. Matter of fact I had to learn how to develop strong boundaries in my feild. I havent talked about these things that happened to me in 15 years.  But this is a thread talking about respect of submissives being an illusion. I would say yes, it is an illusion.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:46:11 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Its funny. There have been dominat women here making a case for woman being authoritative and taking care of things or having a mans outlook or demeaner. Even a mention of hormones, which would typically be a below the belt hit from a man. But saying we shouldnt whine, be authorative etc, somehow to me translates to you must be dominant. So if I am not a "strong woman" then I should be preyed upon?  Because thats what happens. The stronger bullying types exert their authority over the weaker ones.


So you are saying that IF a woman is submissive.......she should get preferential treatment from all and sundry?

If so, it is rather counter productive to the whole argument of equality.



No but the submissive should be protected from predators.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:51:06 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I protect those unable to protect themself. I expect grown adults to be......well, adults.

If a submissive is so weak and unable to take care of themself, they probably should go back to mommy and daddy.

And, going back to the topic of submissives being respected members, acting like a defenseless child is quite counter productive to that cause.


< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 4/10/2009 1:53:28 PM >

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:51:20 PM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline 		my bad people it's the survival of the fittest out there be it dominant slave submissive or what.
If you don't fight for yourself you can't expect others to do it for you
Respect is built by the person, their character and how they present themselves, not whether they're submissive dominant or otherwise so it's not an illusion.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:54:46 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I protect those unable to protect themself. I expect grown adults to be......well, adults.

If a submissive is so weak and unable to take care of themself, they probably should go back to mommy and daddy.




If I go to an authority figure at a club to report something and they are dismissive of me what am I do to? The thing I would so is vote with my feet and not go back Luckily I have not had that problem at a club.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:57:06 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
No but the submissive should be protected from predators.

You've never met a victim sub who preys emotionally on doms?


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 1:58:41 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I protect those unable to protect themself. I expect grown adults to be......well, adults.

If a submissive is so weak and unable to take care of themself, they probably should go back to mommy and daddy.




If I go to an authority figure at a club to report something and they are dismissive of me what am I do to? The thing I would so is vote with my feet and not go back Luckily I have not had that problem at a club.


Well, there you go! Taddaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!! Not so difficult is it.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 2:04:42 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
No but the submissive should be protected from predators.

You've never met a victim sub who preys emotionally on doms?



As I said before, anyone should be able to be protected from predators.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 2:05:24 PM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

If I go to an authority figure at a club to report something and they are dismissive of me what am I do to?



The problem with that is this: were every 'authority figure' to run to the rescue on the back of an alleged issue, then it would be open season. Only where the 'authority figure' has concrete evidence of a misdemeanour, is he/she obliged to act.

Quite frankly, anyone needing protection from 'preying' men, really shouldn't be in a club.

Back to the OP, anyone feeling they're not getting respect should find more respectful people with which to socialise. No one has a right to respect, and meeting people who are less than respectful is part and parcel of life.

_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Submissive as a respected member of your community.... - 4/10/2009 2:06:03 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I protect those unable to protect themself. I expect grown adults to be......well, adults.

If a submissive is so weak and unable to take care of themself, they probably should go back to mommy and daddy.




If I go to an authority figure at a club to report something and they are dismissive of me what am I do to? The thing I would so is vote with my feet and not go back Luckily I have not had that problem at a club.


Well, there you go! Taddaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!! Not so difficult is it.



But the question was is the submissive respected. I say, its obvious that the answer is no.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 80
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