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RE: age play - 5/2/2009 1:49:15 PM

YourhandMyAss

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Excuse me but inner children, and feeling the presence of them is not only a "persona" It can be a very real part of us, and I speak from experience. And it is a severe breach of trust when you trust the small and vulnerable parts of yourself to someone who should be by all rights trust worthy and they violate your trust and for me it would not be "easily fixed" by tucking me in and reading books to me and stuff. It'd take a lot of work andbuilding that track record of trustability all over again.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper

You're cognizant that the inner child is only a persona. Do not lose that link. Remember it fondly, as it will be crucial in understanding why the "abuse" is not as severe as your inner child believes.

A

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RE: age play - 5/2/2009 1:51:30 PM

YourhandMyAss

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Not all people who do ageplay had a traumatic childhood nor never got the love they deserved as a kid. That's an understandable assumption to leap to, but it's not correct for all inner children.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I fully understand where you're coming from. You had a traumatic childhood, and it's very healing for you to relive the nurturing that you should have received and never did. I have had a full relationship that is nonsexual with a girl who was abused as a child and needs to feel safe as a child-person at times.

Bluntly, if your Dom broke a limit and doesn't seem concerned, I'd be VERY upset if I were you.

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RE: age play - 5/2/2009 3:02:58 PM

DarkSteven

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YHMA, please reread the OP. She had a very serious reaction to anything sexual when she was little. I cannot help but attribute that to abuse when she was young.

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

Not all people who do ageplay had a traumatic childhood nor never got the love they deserved as a kid. That's an understandable assumption to leap to, but it's not correct for all inner children.
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

I fully understand where you're coming from. You had a traumatic childhood, and it's very healing for you to relive the nurturing that you should have received and never did. I have had a full relationship that is nonsexual with a girl who was abused as a child and needs to feel safe as a child-person at times.

Bluntly, if your Dom broke a limit and doesn't seem concerned, I'd be VERY upset if I were you.

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Post #: 23

RE: age play - 5/3/2009 9:20:48 AM

Jeptha

Posts: 780
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From: Portland, Oregon
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper

...When discussing your need for a pure and innocent corner of the world, see if he needs a twisted perverse molesting corner of the world. If he does, be 100% aware which world you're going into before hand. Don't mix.

Ok ~ that made me chuckle. I probably wouldn't be good for this.

Seriously, though, this has been an interesting thread because I hadn't ever seriously considered the whole "inner child" thing as a serious, workable concept.
But now I'll try to give it a consider or two.

_____________________________

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RE: age play - 5/3/2009 9:47:40 AM

swtslutMM

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Yes, i understand how it made you feel abused. i also see that He took advantage and should be ashamed of himself.

We trust our Dom/Daddy, we look to them as being the one source we can talk to in a completely open manner and then trust to make a decision that is good for us.

Age play is many things, for me it is my life. When out in the world i am an adult, i hide the 'little' inside of me and manage to make it through my day. When home i can relax and be myself.

i am going off topic and i am sorry.

Please talk to your partner, let him know how hurt you truly are. i don't think age play with someone else right now is what you need though. IMO both your inner child and your everyday girl need to heal.

Of course that is my opinion only

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RE: age play - 5/3/2009 8:10:40 PM

YourhandMyAss

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Why wouldn't it be serious and why wouldn't it be a "workable concept" It's not impossible to have parts of you who've never grown up emotionally, or parts of you that have very specific needs in regards of personal care taken with the parts from a partner.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeptha

Ok ~ that made me chuckle. I probably wouldn't be good for this.

Seriously, though, this has been an interesting thread because I hadn't ever seriously considered the whole "inner child" thing as a serious, workable concept.
But now I'll try to give it a consider or two.

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Post #: 26

RE: age play - 5/4/2009 7:14:56 PM

Jeptha

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quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

Why wouldn't it be serious and why wouldn't it be a "workable concept" It's not impossible to have parts of you who've never grown up emotionally, or parts of you that have very specific needs in regards of personal care taken with the parts from a partner.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeptha

Ok ~ that made me chuckle. I probably wouldn't be good for this.

Seriously, though, this has been an interesting thread because I hadn't ever seriously considered the whole "inner child" thing as a serious, workable concept.
But now I'll try to give it a consider or two.

I don't mean to offend - it's just that, back when I first heard it, the phrase "inner child" sounded so impossibly whispy to me that I never really took it seriously.
But, I never looked into it, so I am speaking out of ignorance there.

I've always regarded people as kids who have added on layers of sophistication, so that concept is sorta like the "inner child"...only one now with some pretty sophisticated powers ...

I've never really considered treating the inner child as a seperate entity that you could converse with, though.

However, I have "split off" to some degree, a critical voice inside of me that reacts automatically (and therefor thoughtlessly) to things...my inner judgmental bastard, as it were.

So, you know, I could see the use of that technique in other applications.

Still, to tell you the truth, when I read the very first post in this thread, I did identify somewhat more with the dom than with the person who posted...that's part of the reason why I say I don't think I'd be good at interacting with someone else's inner child...

_____________________________

...YOU KNOW HOW I LIKE MY PORK CHOPS!
- - - - - - -
"....(somewhere) therein lies the truthiness..."
~*~*~*~*
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Post #: 27

RE: age play - 5/4/2009 7:59:17 PM

Whiplashsmile4

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Some people don't have "Littles" or "Alters" and can engage in both Regressive and Sexual Age play at the same time.

However, Sexual age play is not the thing to do if you have "Littles" or "Alters" involved.
I would say his lack of understanding about "Littles", "Alters" and "DID" is what blindly got him into trouble and cause you great alarm.

No, you are not wierd. However, you need to make it clear that you have "Little(s), Alters, or a form of DID".

Some people are not Educated enough on Alters, Littles and DID. The issue really is not about age play as much as it is about "Alter Little Personalities".

There are some good resources online about "DID, Alters, and Littles", I would suggest a little light reading for your DOM on the matter. This should enlighten him greatly about what went wrong and why.

Hope this helps.

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Post #: 28

RE: age play - 5/5/2009 10:45:12 AM

Jeptha

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I think you are exactly right, Whiplashsmile4.

I've had partners who wanted to be little girls, but it was entirely metaphorical - it was just one manifestation of a power imbalance kind of relationship. So it was just a symbolic thing. It wasn't intended as any kind of therapeutic encounter (necessarily).

And ~ I was the one who took on the authoritarian role and kind of enforced it and tried to make it tangible. If she did any kind of regression thing, it was in her mind only. She would be a little more quiet and submissive, but wouldn't "act" it out any more than that.

That's been my experience with it, and I kind of wondered if the OP's dominant might have been coming from a similar place. I'm not exactly sure if that would properly be called "age play" or not, but it's another example of how differently things can be interpretted.

_____________________________

...YOU KNOW HOW I LIKE MY PORK CHOPS!
- - - - - - -
"....(somewhere) therein lies the truthiness..."
~*~*~*~*
http://www.myspace.com/crocusofiron

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Post #: 29

RE: age play - 5/5/2009 12:52:55 PM

YourhandMyAss

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Whiplashsmile it depend on what the littles or alters or inner children, or what ever they call themselves want. Some want sexual ageplay, and some need sexual ageplay in their little headspace for some it is very very sexual /sexualized. And who are we to say that is not the thing to do, if an inner person wants and needs it and is capably sound to consent to sexual activities with their little person headspace.

Now obviously if the inner or what ever they want to call themself, does NOT want sexual stuff to be involved, then of course it's not the "thing to do" But there are inners littles alternates , whatever they choose to be called and that enjoy sexual situations in little space.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Whiplashsmile4

Some people don't have "Littles" or "Alters" and can engage in both Regressive and Sexual Age play at the same time.

However, Sexual age play is not the thing to do if you have "Littles" or "Alters" involved.

Hope this helps.

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Post #: 30

RE: age play - 5/5/2009 1:05:01 PM

YourhandMyAss

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Being good at it or not is kind of like a workable concept I guess.

If you didn't understand all the nuances and ins and outs and you didn't understand how someone you knew as mostly an adult needed to do child like activities and have it authentically child like,* no sexual over tones at all just 100 percent pure innocence* Then I can see how for someone like that it's not very workable.

Not all people are comfortable or equiped or capable of dealing with those parts of a person.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeptha

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourhandMyAss

Why wouldn't it be serious and why wouldn't it be a "workable concept" It's not impossible to have parts of you who've never grown up emotionally, or parts of you that have very specific needs in regards of personal care taken with the parts from a partner.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeptha

Ok ~ that made me chuckle. I probably wouldn't be good for this.

Seriously, though, this has been an interesting thread because I hadn't ever seriously considered the whole "inner child" thing as a serious, workable concept.
But now I'll try to give it a consider or two.

I don't mean to offend - it's just that, back when I first heard it, the phrase "inner child" sounded so impossibly whispy to me that I never really took it seriously.
But, I never looked into it, so I am speaking out of ignorance there.

I've always regarded people as kids who have added on layers of sophistication, so that concept is sorta like the "inner child"...only one now with some pretty sophisticated powers ...

I've never really considered treating the inner child as a seperate entity that you could converse with, though.

However, I have "split off" to some degree, a critical voice inside of me that reacts automatically (and therefor thoughtlessly) to things...my inner judgmental bastard, as it were.

So, you know, I could see the use of that technique in other applications.

Still, to tell you the truth, when I read the very first post in this thread, I did identify somewhat more with the dom than with the person who posted...that's part of the reason why I say I don't think I'd be good at interacting with someone else's inner child...

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Post #: 31

RE: age play - 5/5/2009 1:14:01 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
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When I regress it is 200 and 10 percent visable. You can tell lol. My voice changs, it sounds younger and I baby talk, my expression changes my mood alters completely, things that would not normally fase adult me really bothers regressed me. Or things that normally make me happy will delight me more in regressed state lol.

Yesterday we were at Michaels craft store for example and I was really happy and I was looking at all the stickers , and Daddy comes up to me and I was like look at the stickies with me? and he's like ok and I was like ooooooooh stickies yay stickies, they're pwetty, do you like stickies daddy? When we got home and I found out one of the opend packages of stickers had come undone and was stuck to everything else, I was like, ut oh help help, my stickies came undone, my stickies help, and then cried when they turned out ruined, and pouted and said in this little pitiful voice, Daddy they're ruined, and then asked can we go back to Micahels and get some more Daddy?

Normally I would of been like what do you think of stickers, and when they were ruined I would of been like fuck, damn shit oh well no big deal.

I am very much more a mix of innocent and naughty when regressed lol, I would never tell James the ranch at the dinner table at MAry's looked like cum when not regressed cause I know better , when I am regressed just like a true child, you never know what will pop out, and I have no clue it wasn't ok to say unless you knock me out of childheadspace with your reaction to me.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeptha

I think you are exactly right, Whiplashsmile4.

I've had partners who wanted to be little girls, but it was entirely metaphorical - it was just one manifestation of a power imbalance kind of relationship. So it was just a symbolic thing. It wasn't intended as any kind of therapeutic encounter (necessarily).

And ~ I was the one who took on the authoritarian role and kind of enforced it and tried to make it tangible. If she did any kind of regression thing, it was in her mind only. She would be a little more quiet and submissive, but wouldn't "act" it out any more than that.

That's been my experience with it, and I kind of wondered if the OP's dominant might have been coming from a similar place. I'm not exactly sure if that would properly be called "age play" or not, but it's another example of how differently things can be interpretted.

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RE: age play - 5/5/2009 2:11:07 PM

phoenixxy

Posts: 30
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeptha

I've had partners who wanted to be little girls, but it was entirely metaphorical - it was just one manifestation of a power imbalance kind of relationship. So it was just a symbolic thing. It wasn't intended as any kind of therapeutic encounter (necessarily).

I must say this is more how I feel with age play, however my advice would be to have a serious sit down conversation with your Dom, I appreciate that he is your Dom and can do what he likes BUT if you made a special request which he has ignored and it has caused you hurt and angst you need to define that line more firmly.
I really hope you are okay and feel better soon.
x

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Post #: 33