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RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 8:20:41 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I am often attracted to strong women. Sometimes that woman ends up being dominant also. However, in most dominant women, as time goes on they tend to exibit personality traits that I see more as weaknesses which makes them very unattractive to me.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 9:19:41 AM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b

Have you ever been attracted to someone on the same side of the kneel as you, e.g. dominant attracted to a dominant or submissive attracted to another submissive?

What happened? Has anyone managed to form a successful relationship in this way?


I've been lucky, I think. One advantage I've had in the household structure we've created is that I've had the joy of having close, intimate relationships with several folks on the same side of the kneel as myself... and even managed to sustain some incredible, close, intimate relationships with people as I journeyed between sides of the kneel myself.

Right now, I'm still living with a companion who is in the midst of determining whether xhe might want to shift sides of the kneel hirself. I feel like I can cherish hir, regardless of which side xhe ends up on, and, having made that journey myself, I feel like it increases my capacity for compassion as well as love for hir.


_____________________________

***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 11:36:56 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I am often attracted to strong women. Sometimes that woman ends up being dominant also. However, in most dominant women, as time goes on they tend to exibit personality traits that I see more as weaknesses which makes them very unattractive to me.


I just now read a thread on weight control that emphasizes the bolded part perfectly. Sadly, it is apparent, the person has zero clue how they appear.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 2:07:52 PM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline 		Twice.  Or is it once?  Or is it somewhere in between?  The first time i was attracted to a switch male i know.  At first i wasn't aware of his switch side, but after i was i thought "Okay."  i thought i was "in love" and all that jazz.  But as time went on W/we realized it would never work in the long run.  The second time it was another submissive female.  she & i both acknowledged it, agreed on the attraction, and talk about it still now and then, but distance is a factor so it will probably always remain unknown whether it would've worked out or not.  Sometimes it's better that way.

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 3:53:35 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline 		I guess it would depend on what you mean by successful.  I have agood friend who is a submissive man.  He is very attractive, sweet and funny.  We have a standing coffee ‘date’ every Saturday morning.  It is a platonic friendship,  Sometimes I wonder (have fantasies) what would happen if we became intimate, but I know I can’t be dominant enough for him in the long run.  We have a good thing going; I don’t want to ruin it with sex!

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 3:53:54 PM   
caelestis


Posts: 195
Joined: 9/6/2008
Status: offline 		Certainly.  I'm often attracted to other s-types simply because they are cute, and I have a weakness for cute things. 
I don't think it'd work well in a relationship though (at least not 1x1, maybe a poly, one D-type and two s-types).  I can imagine us arguing over who was going to to what for who.

_____________________________

"We are a fountain of shimmering contradictions, most of us. Beautiful in the concept, if we're lucky, but frequently tedious or regrettable as we flesh ourselves out."
— Gregory Maguire



(in reply to amoryblane)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 5:36:13 PM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		I've found the occassional Dominant Woman attractive in that way, however that has always been accompanied by spotting some small signs of possible submission in them. It has never been acted upon as I wouldn't insult them by presuming that even if what I thought I saw was there it is a large enough part of them to be acknowledged let alone acted on, which is the only way such a relationship could work as when I care (In a relationship sense) I control.... Ain't going to happen if She is also a Dominant. I simply accept We are not compatable and don't give it another thought!

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to amoryblane)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 6:41:30 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

I've found the occassional Dominant Woman attractive in that way, however that has always been accompanied by spotting some small signs of possible submission in them. It has never been acted upon as I wouldn't insult them by presuming that even if what I thought I saw was there it is a large enough part of them to be acknowledged let alone acted on, which is the only way such a relationship could work as when I care (In a relationship sense) I control.... Ain't going to happen if She is also a Dominant. I simply accept We are not compatable and don't give it another thought!


Thank you for that, RavenMuse!  So many mistake a gentle demeanor for submission, when it is nowhere near the truth. 

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 6:51:10 PM   
CrazyCats


Posts: 116
Joined: 2/15/2009
Status: offline 		Yes, I tend to be interested in strong personality types. Usually it ends up being more like two wet cats in a small bag, but when ya find the right combination of strength, it does create a very stable and potent dynamic. My gal is a switch, subbie to me, but tends to be dominant towards other women, and well most everyone else in general till they hit that right combination of buttons.



_____________________________

quote:

Niccolo Machiavelli
Severities should be dealt out all at once, so that their suddenness may give less offense; benefits ought to be handed out drop by drop, so that they may be relished the more.


(in reply to stella41b)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 6:57:29 PM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
Thank you for that, RavenMuse!  So many mistake a gentle demeanor for submission, when it is nowhere near the truth. 


Just as many mistake confidence for Dominance on the other side, My girl has been mistaken for a Domme a couple of times which, if I'm nearby when it happens, never fails to make Me laugh as it confuses the heck out of her!


_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 6:58:42 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
Thank you for that, RavenMuse!  So many mistake a gentle demeanor for submission, when it is nowhere near the truth. 


Just as many mistake confidence for Dominance on the other side, My girl has been mistaken for a Domme a couple of times which, if I'm nearby when it happens, never fails to make Me laugh as it confuses the heck out of her!



All of my submissive female friends get mistaken for dominants!  Sometimes I think we really do need coloured badges!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 7:09:41 PM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
All of my submissive female friends get mistaken for dominants!  Sometimes I think we really do need coloured badges!


Tsk and spoil My fun at the horrified look on her face when some submale cringes in front of her asking if her 'divinity' would care to use him as an ashtray! LOL

The 'hanky code' didn't get much widespread use in straight environs, I don't think badges would fare any better..... just like on the net, the fantasists wouldn't 'read' what they ment anyhow.


_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Like attracting like - 5/4/2009 7:16:48 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I kind of like it when a male dominant thinks I'm submissive.  It never fails to amuse me when I ask them if they like being spanked, because it sure isn't going to be me.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!


(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Like attracting like - 5/5/2009 2:35:39 AM   
cravesdom


Posts: 5219
Joined: 3/28/2008
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		As you may know, when Bob and I met here on CM we were both looking for a relationship with a dominant person. I had never taken a dominant role with a man before and really had no idea if it was even something I would enjoy, much less be any good at. But getting to know who he was as a person made it something I was very willing to try. Fortunately for me, he was willing to give it a try too. We even discussed the possibility of opening up our relationship to include a third party or even another couple if for some reason we weren't able to give the other what we needed. We have been switching roles since the first time we met in person and it has worked out really well for us. There is never a power struggle over who gets to be in charge, at least not in more than a joking way. We are very much in love. He flies in tomorrow to help me move to live with him on Friday. It has been 10 months since we met in Polls & Other Random Stupidity. I know that this is still just the beginning of a long and wonderful relationship.

I never thought I would fall for another sub, but thank goodness I was open enough to consider the possibilities when I did. I wouldn't trade my Bob for any Dom in the world. He is everything I want and need. I have never been happier than I am with him.

_____________________________

Finally home where I belong.

"A lot of disappointed people have been left standing on the street corner waiting for the bus marked 'Perfection.' " Donald Kennedy

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Like attracting like - 5/5/2009 2:50:03 AM   
LyraLaLaurie


Posts: 83
Joined: 4/14/2009
Status: offline 		I've dated dominant males, but over time it got DRAINING--to have to keep proving I only switch in the bedroom and I do not have a truly submissive personality. The competition kept chemistry for awhile but in the end, I was just not "wifey" enough. I've had much better success with switch men. Not sure if I could date a true submissive...when it comes to love, I want to submit sexually, and when it comes to a fling, I like it ALL.

I've heard of more common success between two submissives than two dominants.

(in reply to amoryblane)
Profile   Post #: 35
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