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Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 5:01:53 PM   
seekingxtc


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Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made.
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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 5:08:54 PM   
ShadeDiva


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As far as I'm concerned yes it is cheating if you are hiding this from your partner and they have NO idea it is going on or to what depth it is going on.

Just how I see it.

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 5:17:44 PM   
MstrssPassion


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rather than asks a bunch of strangers, one should ask their significant other... that would surely provide the asker with an accurate answer

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 5:18:21 PM   
IrishMist


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quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingxtc

Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made.


If you are hiding it, then yes, it's cheating.


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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 5:23:29 PM   
Arpig


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cheating is entirely in the mind of the one being cheated on...if the significant other feels it is cheating, then that's really all that matters.
I would assume that getting a blowjob at work would be considered cheating, but Hillary doesn't see it that way....it is the cheatee who defines it.

< Message edited by Arpig -- 2/3/2006 5:29:48 PM >


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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 5:23:32 PM   
seaturtle50


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Yes, if it is done without disclosure to ones partner/Owner.

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 5:49:20 PM   
EarthGoddess52


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Yes, cybersex is cheating if it detracts from your "other obligations", but then so would be other obsessive forms of entertainment like gambling or video games. Relationships of value, D/s or otherwise, take time, energy and compromise to nurture. It would be a sad state to say "Gee, Honey, i can't go to my child's soccer game, I have a cyber date"

We are the product of the choices we make.

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 6:51:56 PM   
perverseangelic


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As with everyone else here--if you hide it from your partner, if you feel youc ant' tell your partner about it, it's cheating.

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 7:17:35 PM   
jamesthehumanrug


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if it were my mother and father; i would look at it as cheating ;so as not to hurt mom ;and cause them to brake up ;and have a major upset ;like dad dont like my mom best;first; last; and above all else!
....but if it were me and remember you heard it here first ;cause i really did the hit song ;if you love her let her go and several more like it ,also number one;
but i was plagiarized and jammed out,of everything;but
i like my top- female- diva, to have it all ;i know
i cant be everything to her.
.... i even see my mom had flattering romeos around ,
that made her happy ,
altho she loved dad way better....,
but, if i let my top goddess laff ,and, play on the internet, and out ,when she wants to step out ,and do what ever it is that makes her happy ,then i feel deeply satisfied, cause the love of my life is able to be happy;
it THRILLS ME TO SEE HER HAPPY;
WHATEVER THE COST....
in life; ....sickness ;and time ;and money ;and health ;can be taken in an instant,
and to PUT ENERGY AND EFFORT INTO HAVING TO PUT THE OTHER DOWN AND argue ,
then loose that person, for the moment ,or forever....
is a selfish thing to engage in...YOU GOTTA THINK OF BOTH OF YOUR FUTURES;AND SOMETIMES
you have to think of the other persons' happiness; no matter how small ;or short ;or big THEIR HAPPINESS IS....WHERE-EVER THEY FIND IT.
love is sacrifice ;
(AND, YES ;I DID NO SACRIFICE)
are you willing,TO SACRIFICE?;
if not ;
it's a war ;if one ,or the other takes a freedom AWAY FROM THE OTHER ,JUST CAUSE THE OTHER IS SIMPLY TRYING TO FEEL AND , be instantly happy SOMEPLACE ELSE;
,SO BIG DEAL;THEY GOT A THRILL ;
is it worth chipping away at the foundation of a relationship?
if i don't love someone;it ends sooner or later ;and i dont care if i act jelous ;PETTY;ETC.,
HARNESS THEM IN;
RAIN ON THEIR PARADE IF THEY FLIRT;
cause i dont like the person anyway,
but, when i love,
nothing- gets in my way,nothing gets ,in our way ;
i let her go;
i know she loves me but, i can't dictate;OR what kinda love is that?;demand it!?!
Lovers love, on many different levels,
not everyone IS LOVED ON THE the same LEVEL,BUT YOU CAN LOVE A LOT OF PEOPLE;AT THE SAME TIME;
NO ONE IS THE SAME,THATS ALL.
SO cheating is no big deal;IF ,THATS HOW SOME GET THEIR PERSONAL JOLLYS,CAUSE:
REMEMBER :
you can do it
EVEN better than they do you
,if you are motivated enuff;.....
so let them go;
who's really better?INTERNET FLING HE NEEDS,OR YOU,THAT HE NEEDS?
AND EVEN ,IF THEY FIND LOVE ELSEWHERE,AND BECOME LOVEBIRDS;GOOD LUCK TO THEM;YOU WERENT IMPORTANT ,SO GET RID OF THEM BOTH AND BE HAPPY
(ANOTHER SONG I DID)
;WISH THEM WELL DUST OFF(DID THAT SONG TOO) AND FIND THE ONE YOU WANT.
COMPETE;REIN THEM IN; TAKE ALL THEIR TIME;FIND ONE YOU CAN HAVE IN A CLOSED RELATIONSHIP;
IF YOU LET THEM GO;YOULL FIND ITS CLOSED ANYWAY;
obvious:you dont wanna sacrifice with this one ;
even mom asked me ,when dad died;do you think i should have been more into politics,cause he had tons of political girls;and,
not momma;(those girls loyal to dad,to the end;were ignorant but, served his interests and happiness)
i said,to mom;yes he would have loved it; he would have loved her no matter what but especially
in politics
cause he loved politics;
she said she was stupid ,but didnt know anybetter,in time,and, will always wish she had....i said; he sure didnt like those political- womin as much as he woulda liked you,to show in that arena....
last point:on is it cheating:do you know the song titled:
do you like pena collatas ;it is another ripped off number one song;i did,but,
try listening to the words....when i made it ;
i had a very pure woman;in mind;that i could never say sex to(respected her way too much) ,nor could i ever get personal with her .,altho her looks melted me down...but i loved her best ;certainly way above anyone, or anything,else,
in fact; i did all my songs for her, by at least the end of the song, if i started doing it for someone else ;like my sister or my brother....or my mom.....and, i had my deep personal wishes for happiness,that could have made me happy with HER,but,.... i sang about writing to the 'personals' to get my jollies ,and , i sang about ending up meeting her in the end ,anyway! i sang ,about just putting out a 'personal-AD';
tho i loved her;but ,
looking for someone else,in that song....
,try it!!;
write him an email!
it might turn out the same way.
see if you really are soulmates ,as it turned out in the end of my song.
believe me ;....if there was'nt ,so much money involved;i am sure things would have worked out exactly that PERFECT- for ME and my soul mate/ mentor ;but ,....
its way ,too late, for any of that now;
everyone's slain ;dead;period.
-IN THE END; i could'nt EVER be jelous ,with her;ever ;anyways;
THAT is the real truth;
NO ONE CAN POSSIBLY COME BETWEEN US;NOTHING;
she taught me how to love.,with compassion ,just like my momma did.....
quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingxtc

Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made.



< Message edited by jamesthehumanrug -- 2/3/2006 8:12:22 PM >


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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 9:27:11 PM   
HouseofBear


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To me dishonesty in any form is "cheating" on your partner, whether it be cyber, realtime, and whether it involves sex or not. Dishonesty cheats your partner out of their ability to place trust in you.

Lady Ursa

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 9:28:48 PM   
Nendarye


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quote:

ORIGINAL: HouseofBear

To me dishonesty in any form is "cheating" on your partner, whether it be cyber, realtime, and whether it involves sex or not. Dishonesty cheats your partner out of their ability to place trust in you.

Lady Ursa


Very well stated Lady Ursa




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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/3/2006 11:19:53 PM   
brightspot


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Yes, I find it cheating if your partner is unaware.
I also find it very boring!


*Brightspot

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 4:56:11 AM   
KatyLied


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Yep, it's cheating.

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 5:00:24 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


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quote:

Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made



Intimacy without permission and disclosure is cheating. Whether that's sucking face in the closet with a co-worker during an office party or getting hot and heavy online with a complete stranger...

I have someone close to me (vanilla) who was having some marital problems centered around his lack of sex drive (so he claimed) - she found out that her husband was constantly renting porn movies behind her back and when he was allegedly "up late working in his office" was in fact watching porn. You bet she felt cheated on.

It's so damn easy to just discuss parameters with your partner.


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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 7:11:40 AM   
tasha_tart


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From: Ontario, Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingxtc

Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made.

Unless your partner/spouse/significant other knows about it and approves, it is definitely cheating. Of course that is only my opinion; your results may vary.

Tasha



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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 8:19:04 AM   
thetammyjo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingxtc

Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made.


I consider any sexual relationship (mental, emotional, physical) to be equal in terms of what I call poly or not.

That being said if I know a person I'm talking to has a history of cybersex I would be a stupid to think that would just stop once we were together. I think cyber and flesh fulfill different needs.

As long as my partner didn't hide it and gave me the amount of time I needed/wanted with him, I don't have a problem with it.

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 8:23:11 AM   
Real0ne


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quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingxtc

Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made.



Its just like the post does prodomme=hooker however it differes in that there are more than 2 answers.

by legal definition no its not
by dictionary definition doubtflul
by ethical or moral definition most likely yes

it certainly can dim the fire in a realationship and turn a persons sexual energies to someone/thing other than your partner

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 8:38:57 AM   
SweetDommes


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Real0ne

Its just like the post does prodomme=hooker however it differes in that there are more than 2 answers.



No offense intended here, but ...

We know your stand on it, and I think I can safely say that most of us are mighty tired of hearing you spout it at every opportunity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingxtc

Do you see cyber sex as cheating? I have been asked and had not thought about it. I thought of it as cheating if in a relationship that is not open. They thought it is not cheating. Just fun between them and some one else on the other end of the computer. Even when it is ongoing and dates are made.


Seeking, I agree with what the others have said - it depends on the relationship and the people in it. In our relationship, as long as the other 3 people were told what was going on, it would be acceptable but if it was done with any deceit (say, I had permission to cyber with one person, then decided not to cyber with them, but with someone else instead) then it would be cheating.

< Message edited by SweetDommes -- 2/4/2006 8:39:19 AM >

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 11:16:40 AM   
Real0ne


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes
Seeking, I agree with what the others have said - it depends on the relationship and the people in it. In our relationship, as long as the other 3 people were told what was going on, it would be acceptable but if it was done with any deceit (say, I had permission to cyber with one person, then decided not to cyber with them, but with someone else instead) then it would be cheating.


yeh that is a good point.

cheating can be anything that goes outside of the understood parameters of a relationship.

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RE: Cyber-sex Is it cheating? - 2/4/2006 11:25:57 AM   
HotLover


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Cyber sex is cheating, for you are having cyber sex with someone that you are not married to while married to another or is someone other than your g/f. Some will claim that it is not, but there is no way around it & try as they may, it is cheating!!! Some ppl out therehate the word cheating, but that is what it is. No way around it. Cheating is Cheating- no matter how you go about it.

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