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MarcEsadrian -> RE: When is it "real"? (5/11/2009 4:48:37 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Whenready
Prompted by the "Online" D/s ... how do you feel about it?" thread, when does a relationship become "real"?
Given the advances in technology, is phone more or less real than PC voice? And so on?
When is a mere relationship real? When there is relational context—no matter how subtle the form—between two or more parties.
Regarding remote contact, there is quite a bit that can be shared and exchanged between minds by voice alone. Be that as it may, is it natural for humans to remain crystallized in this form of interaction? Certainly not. With a nod to the intriguing anecdotes of penpalmanship from days of old between Kings and Queens and lovers, the "long distance relationship" we know of today is an entirely new phenomenon brought on by telecommunications and computers. The last million or so years of human history would show that we are naturally tactile creatures; physical togetherness plays a crucial role in socialization and personal context, not just romantic interests. When I take a client out to lunch, I do so not to seal more deals for work, but to maintain connection. Being that my occupation is strictly digital, it's all too easy to become a simple voice or thread of pixel text that exists in the netherworld of the wire. Sitting down with my clients, eating with them, hanging out with them, shaking their hands and looking them in the eye reminds them (and I) that I (and they) are human. An elementary idea—and one we of course already know in an academic sense—but without that physical connection, an entire dimension is lost. In the end, I don't see it any differently when it comes to romantic and / or D/s pursuits online. The internet is a wonderful place to manifest oneself and reach outward in a myriad different directions, but this is no place to linger once a connection has been made. Not for too long, that is.
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