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barelynangel -> RE: Prison visitation (5/21/2009 7:30:26 AM)
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Yeah, the real victims aren't his concern -- only that his friend has to deal with consequences he doesn't like because she chose to screw someone over who probably feels that $1200 loss because she decided what she wanted was more important than having integrity and honesty, as well as after BEING GIVEN a second chance to show she may have simply made an error in judgment and a poor one, showing remorse for the ACTUAL VICTIM by sucking it up and following through on the probation she was given, she decided what SHE WANTED TO DO, was more important than actually putting effort into making sure her decisions were okay and followed along with her probation. What about the guy she screwed for $1200 who instead of putting time in fixing something for someone who would actually paid him, what about HIS kids and HIS FAMILY and HIS JOB? But i guess none of that matters because his poor little friend was transported as a prisoner she WAS, where it wasn't convenient or comfortable, and now she has to spend a year going through a program he doesn't think she should etc. Yeah its ALL THE SYSTEMS FAULT, nevermind the VICTIM.
That is what is irritating the heck out of i think more than anything is the cavalier and non-existant indignation and pretty much oh well, the actual victim doesn't matter attitude the OP and others have. They have the SAME attitude his friend had as well as many other non-violent criminals have when they don't have remorse or responsibility for what they caused someone else. All they care about it seems is the poor criminal who now has to do time because she decided what SHE wanted to do was what was important.
I think if i had seen REMOTELY some compassion for the ACTUAL victim, it would have made some difference, but you see, until such time people like many on this thread AS WELL AS THE CRIMINALS committing the CRIMES against other people recognize who the actual victim is -- the concept they want to employ with regard to non-violent criminals would never work -- in order for it to work people would have to not only take responsibility for their actions and accept and FOLLOW the consequences (which even the OP's friend has shown doesn't happen), they would have to have remorse and understanding of the VICTIMS. Yeah integrity and honor would be concepts that have to be shown.
Now we have the OP still not caring about the victims and wants to acquit people he would believe GUILTY beyond a reasonable doubt and pretty much flip off the victims of these people, all because his friend is facing consequences to HER ACTIONS and lack of understanding the seriousness of her situation and has to deal with stuff he doesn't like
Let's be clear here -- your friend wouldn't BE in this situation if she had integrity and thought about others before she decided to break the law and steal $1200 from someone fraudulently. Again, where is YOUR recognition of HER responsibility here? All i see you saying is hey -- its no big deal -- oh well. IT IS A BIG DEAL!!!!!!!!!!! That's what is so sad to me, you really don't believe ITS A BIG DEAL what she did.
Its all about to me honor and integrity, its about understanding your actions have consequences, its about self-responsibility.
I believe the actual victim in this matter still is out $1200, that hasn't been stated otherwise. And i guess its NO BIG DEAL! You know if the victim had somehow been paid or the thief actually was making an effort to repay it (hell she may have been able to work it off somehow) before she left the state. OP you stated you offered to pay the $1200. You know if you really DO have compassion for the actual victim, you could always send it to him anonymously or with a note explaining you felt his loss was a huge deal and wanted to make right your friends actions. You know understanding who the victim is in this situation would go a long way in maybe changing the system to where criminals could be trusted to understand the seriousness of their crimes without being locked up.
angel
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