RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together?

RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (Full Version)

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califsue -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 1:10:53 AM)
To to OP..based on your last post it would seem to me you have bigger problems than just the weekend sessions. Where is the 12 yr old on the week-ends? AND..if things are not changing and you have communicated your needs to her, then maybe it is time to do a check up on the relationship with the help of a a kink friendly therapist.

BitaTruble -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 1:15:50 AM)
quote: Still for me to provide the emotional and financial support, I want what I want in return. Dom her ass then. What are you waiting for? You want to be the Master, then BE the fucking Master.

breatheasone -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 1:15:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL:cryinks, I strongly encouraged and supported her becoming a teacher. When I first met her she had the degree but a bad experience in her first try at teaching. She was working factory jobs and had given up the idea of teaching. I encouraged her to try again. She warned me that the first year would be very time intensive and she was right. I get it. Still for me to provide the emotional and financial support, I want what I want in return. If that makes me a selfish asshole then so be it. Seriously, just WOW.[&:]

LadySweetOrSour -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 1:22:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cryinks The sex is all that's left between us that keeps us together...and now that is waning as well... If that's all that's keeping you together, it doesn't sound like a great relationship. I see your profile is asking for a third to join in the fun and games and your sub is willing to join in. If she doesn't have the energy to stay up after the UM has gone to bed, where is she going to get the energy to join in anything? If having another women involved is piquing her interest, maybe she is just bored with you, but doesn't want to lose out on the free ride you're providing? It sounds like this relationship has run its course. Maybe time to start looking at your sub to get her own place for her and the daughter and leave you to find another, more compatible partner? Edited because I cant spell and type at the same time

thishereboi -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 5:02:18 AM)
Well according to your profile your looking for a third and your sub is all for it. "We are seeking a submissive woman who would be willing to become part of our team! In other words, ladies, I need some help over here meeting this incredible man's needs!" So what is the point of this thread? According to the profile you both are very happy with the idea so why all the drama?

DarkSteven -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 5:07:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thishereboi So what is the point of this thread? According to the profile you both are very happy with the idea so why all the drama? I've found that people tend to be a lot happier in their profiles than they are on the board. For example, I've seen a lot of femslave profiles that state "I am proud to be in the service of Lord Whumpersnagel and all of you Doms can quit writing me because I will NEVER leave him!!!". Then they post here stating that Lord Whumpersnagel (not mentioned by name) spends all his time screwing other women and playing video games and is there any hope for the five week old relationship?

junecleaver -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 8:00:36 AM)
I don't think you sound like an asshole at all really. Maybe not entirely PC, but not asshole. I'm not completely sure what the dynamic of your relationship is, but in my relationship, whether I want it or not is not that relevant to whether it is going to happen or not. You are the Dominant and when things aren't going the way you want you are responsible for instituting the change. It is not ridiculous to expect some lovin' on a regular basis. It really doesn't take that much energy to take a spanking and be ravished all hot and SM like. Sure, trying out all those porn positions you've seen and bouncing all over you might be too much for her...but laying across your lap and letting you use her? Not that much energy. A lot of the times, I will be extremely tired and he plays with me anyway and even though I didn't want to do it in the beginning I find myself turned on and very willing to participate more. If you have talked until you are tired of talking think about what other things are permissible within your relationship? Is just forcing her into it permissible? Or was that a limit for her? Sounds like words are not doing too much for you at the moment.

Missokyst -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 8:25:59 AM)
Oh gosh thank you! I was beginning to feel like a freak. I kept thinking, "too tired for sex? wtf". The only thing I could think of was he had her and let the romance part stop. Kyst quote:* ORIGINAL: junecleaver I will be extremely tired and he plays with me anyway and even though I didn't want to do it in the beginning I find myself turned on and very willing to participate more.

Mercnbeth -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 10:46:30 AM)
quote: ...How often is normal with you guys?... our normal is as many times a day as He decides to have it. this slave does not tell Him when or where or how or with who HE will get sexual/session with.

cryinks -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 11:16:17 AM)
Now this is the answer I was looking for! Seems to be a minority opinion....

YoungBlondeSlave -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 11:17:55 AM)
It's just what works for them. Sounds like you two need to sit down and figure things out and see what now works for you.

Mercnbeth -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 11:33:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cryinks Now this is the answer I was looking for! Seems to be a minority opinion.... it might be...but then again, we have crafted a very different relationship than you have with your submissive...and we come from a different set of circumstances/life experiences that have shaped us as unique individuals, as well. the foundation of our relaitonship is based on His ultimate control/authority. this slave's career/job is pleasing Him...she has no other career/job. it pleases Him for her to be available for His use...at any time, day or night, seven days a week. no amount of $$ or experience or education that this slave could earn, focusing on something else, can replace that, for Him. neither of us are responsible for minor offspring, either. just a few things to consider.

cryinks -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 2:06:13 PM)
Update! Film at 11! Saturday we had a great session in which she was amazing. It was not quite two hours long but she performed very well. I told her repeated how good she did and I thought about it a lot. She suffered significantly for me because I asked her to and she loves me. Today we had some time constraints and tried to squeeze some spanking and stuff in less than a hour. She did not do very well. I know part of it was she probably needed more recovery time from Saturday. But she also said that I just didn't warm her up as much as she needed to get in the zone. So we discussed that one of the reasons the sessions tend to be long is because it takes quite a while to warm her up. Before all of you guys and gals jump my ass, I am NOT saying that her needing recovery time and warm up time is a character fault - I understand it is natural. Wow, she even cleaned her bathroom! So, things have smoothed out for now. Thanks for all of the comments, even the ones saying (openly or in so many words) I am a selfish asshole. You have the right to your opinion and to post it when I open myself up to such criticism in a forum.

KatyLied -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 2:27:32 PM)
quote: quote: our normal is as many times a day as He decides to have it. this slave does not tell Him when or where or how or with who HE will get sexual/session with. Now this is the answer I was looking for! Seems to be a minority opinion.... And now you are going to try and wrap this into an already established relationship? Parameters of the relationship should be discussed when you realize you have a "relationship" to talk about. A minority opinion? I don't think so. Most people discuss parameters regarding their relationship. And people define relationships in different ways. Perhaps if you stopped talking about your relationship as "sessions" and stopped talking about your sub in terms of how she "performs", you'd be able to recognize that you are in a relationship with a person. A person who has a life and responsibilities beyond you.

BitaTruble -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 3:23:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cryinks Now this is the answer I was looking for! Seems to be a minority opinion.... Merc has exactly the slave he deserves .. and so do you.

peppermint -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 4:20:59 PM)
quote: No, you don't have it straight. She NEVER cooks dinner or any other meal. She, does very little housework (maybe 30 minutes per month), I provide a house where she has her own bathroom (as does her daughter) that one cannot walk through. I do my own laundry, etc, She always goes to bed before the 12 year old. I wasn't clear on these 4-6 hour sessions, those are obviously only on weekends. During the week I would be happy with 1 hour, Another common theme I see in this thread (besides that I am a selfish asshole) is about communication. I do talk about all of this stuff until I am tired of talking about il. In almost every case where somone posted "did you talk to her about..." the answer is ":yes, repeatedly". The problem is that communication doesn't fix the problem unless one or both are willing to change - and that is the issue. I strongly encouraged and supported her becoming a teacher. When I first met her she had the degree but a bad experience in her first try at teaching. She was working factory jobs and had given up the idea of teaching. I encouraged her to try again. She warned me that the first year would be very time intensive and she was right. I get it. Still for me to provide the emotional and financial support, I want what I want in return. If that makes me a selfish asshole then so be it. Several times I have sat down to write a reply to this whole thread. Each time I have deleted my reply. Your story keeps changing. This is NOT what you told us in your first post. As for the daughter you neglected to mention at the beginning, all kids that age go through an awkward stage when they appear bratty and disrepectful. It passes. They grow up to be good people. You did, didn't you?

oceanwinds -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 4:35:48 PM)
I too have been coming back to this thread and each time leaving with a queesy feeling inside. So, i said to self, "what is bothering you"? Then i was able to put my finger on it. As a submissive, i would never consider putting such a personal thread up regarding my Dom. I would find it disrespectful. So I started talking to myself again, yes i do that a lot, and said he is a Dominant and perhaps is into humilation. I see you not seeking help, but humilating her efforts and her desire to serve you. I go away from the thread and ponder on this and come back and read more of your remarks. Op perhaps you are the type of Dom who has no emotional ties to your girl. Sir is not emotionally attached to me in a romantic sense, but i do know he would frown on displaying and humilating me on a post like this. So after thinking about it, and trying to discern why i feel queezy reading your post, OP. i come to realize yay for the right to choose who we serve. i am not feeling queezy anymore. i am safe, i chose right for me.

breatheasone -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 4:51:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cryinks Update! Film at 11! Saturday we had a great session in which she was amazing. It was not quite two hours long but she performed very well. I told her repeated how good she did and I thought about it a lot. She suffered significantly for me because I asked her to and she loves me. Today we had some time constraints and tried to squeeze some spanking and stuff in less than a hour. She did not do very well. I know part of it was she probably needed more recovery time from Saturday. But she also said that I just didn't warm her up as much as she needed to get in the zone. So we discussed that one of the reasons the sessions tend to be long is because it takes quite a while to warm her up. Before all of you guys and gals jump my ass, I am NOT saying that her needing recovery time and warm up time is a character fault - I understand it is natural. Wow, she even cleaned her bathroom! So, things have smoothed out for now. Thanks for all of the comments, even the ones saying (openly or in so many words) I am a selfish asshole. You have the right to your opinion and to post it when I open myself up to such criticism in a forum. Seriously?..... This just keeps getting better, and better...i SERIOUSLY believe we are being "put on" here folks....Theres NO way this can be for real....

kiwisub12 -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 5:15:21 PM)
I'm really interested in where the 12 year old is during these 4 - 6 hour sessions. You can't tell me that the um is unaware of what is going on - and probably is less than impressed with both of the participants. No wonder she is "disrespectful". Equally interesting to me is the fact that you apparently not a dom outside of the bedroom. Otherwise why would you tolerate a messy house and no home cooked meals. Sounds to me that you have sold your soul for some kinky sex - not a D/s relationship. Because you don't sound domly - you sound whiney - and that would make it hard for me to respect you - even if you do look hot. and for the record - I would have a hard time getting into a scene that lasts 4 to 6 hours without getting bored. Maybe your sub has the same problem. Just a thought.

oceanwinds -> RE: Frequency of Sessions after Two Years Together? (5/25/2009 5:29:02 PM)
Well all i know be it a fake post or not, it added to my appreciation of what i have. Couldnt be with a guy who had to come before my child. Just wouldnt make it for me. Respect is earned and would never be earned that way. Not for me to say what is real/fake/true about any OP, but actually am grateful to have read through this with a relief that he aint mine, but someone elses. So i give thanks to the OP for that.

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