am i normal?

am i normal? (Full Version)

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mienliebte -> am i normal? (5/23/2009 10:07:12 AM)
I recently came to the conclusion that I WANT my master to rape me. I always do what he want's and if I get scared, he always backs off. I don't want him to back off, I want him to continue and ignore the safe word. What does this make me? He tells me that it's for my safety and that's a line that shouldn't be crossed. I know he's right and I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I could simply not try to stop him but it doesn't excite me in the same way. Am I alone in this?

breatheasone -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 10:11:11 AM)
Nope, a lot of people have this desire. Theres a search function at the top right of the forum pages Search for threads on this topic, its been well discussed here on collarme. Good luck to you.

GreedyTop -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 10:14:50 AM)
No.. you are not. COMMUNICATE. Tell him what you've said here. Explain that by wanting him to do this that you are giving him consent. I am going to assume that there isnt some kind of past trauma that he may be concerned about dredging up, and say explain to him that you TRUST him not to harm you, and that the fear is within the boundaries of that trust. I hope that made sense. DISCLAIMER: if there ARE past traumas that he should be aware of/concerned about, discuss that as well, and in great depth. YMMV

tkenslve -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 10:17:59 AM)
No, you are not alone and it is a somewhat common fantasy. But, i can understand your Master's decision to stop when you safe word. If you really want this, you and he need to figure out a way that you can get the experience you want AND he can feel confident that you arent going to 'cry rape' later.

NorthernGent -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 10:57:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mienliebte I recently came to the conclusion that I WANT my master to rape me. As you're consenting, you're not being raped. Where does a safe word come into this? What's particularly unsafe about agreeing to rape play and acting on it? Unless you've asked him to slit your throat in the process, I'm struggling to understand what's going on here.... P.S. Yes, you're normal.

Musicmystery -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 11:40:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mienliebte I recently came to the conclusion that I WANT my master to rape me. Am I alone in this? Hell, better than half the vanilla women I know have this fantasy.

YourhandMyAss -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 11:49:27 AM)
Who cares who thinks you're normal or not. Plenty will say no and plenty will say yes. Plenty of people do rape play quite safely and Some don't even want to go there. quote: ORIGINAL: mienliebte I recently came to the conclusion that I WANT my master to rape me. I always do what he want's and if I get scared, he always backs off. I don't want him to back off, I want him to continue and ignore the safe word. What does this make me? He tells me that it's for my safety and that's a line that shouldn't be crossed. I know he's right and I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I could simply not try to stop him but it doesn't excite me in the same way. Am I alone in this?

DarkSteven -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 11:49:34 AM)
It's your fantasy, but make sure he's comfortable with it. And begin with the understanding that this might not be done right the first time - but will be done again. Reduce the expectations and the stress. And talk about it a lot first and don't push too much. This could be a hard limit for him.

antipode -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 12:59:07 PM)
quote: ignore the safe word That is really bright. So how is he supposed to know when to stop at all? What is the safeword for, in your mind? Part of the game?

Focus50 -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 1:00:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mienliebte I recently came to the conclusion that I WANT my master to rape me. I always do what he want's and if I get scared, he always backs off. I don't want him to back off, I want him to continue and ignore the safe word. What does this make me? He tells me that it's for my safety and that's a line that shouldn't be crossed. I know he's right and I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I could simply not try to stop him but it doesn't excite me in the same way. Am I alone in this? *What's wrong* is that you want the best of both worlds, which is screwing things up for BOTH of you! This statement is what's fucked - "I want him to continue and ignore the safe word." You don't mess with agreed safewords. If you really want him to continue, even when you get scared, then of all the things you cry out, you can't be using the safeword. D/s relationships are about control and rules. Seems to me your Master is playing within the rules by backing off when you safeword. Time you took a bit of responsibility for your own actions instead of putting EVERYTHING on him to figure out just what the fuck is going through your mind. <sheesh> Focus.**

OrionTheWolf -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 2:26:57 PM)
~FR~ Not every relationship has a safeword. Just remove the obstacle.

SummerWind -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 2:33:13 PM)
Unfortunately.....if the general population of folks on these boards judge you as normal.....you're nuts...... Enjoy the ride anyway.....

RedMagic1 -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 2:52:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf Not every relationship has a safeword. Just remove the obstacle. I agree. Play without a safe word. Or play with a "safe word" that won't be respected. Same diff. If he insists on a form of communication so he knows to stop if, for example, you've broken a bone, then you would be wise to work something out with him, because he's insisting from a place of compassion and care.

breatheasone -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 3:00:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RedMagic1 quote: ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf Not every relationship has a safeword. Just remove the obstacle. I agree. Play without a safe word. Or play with a "safe word" that won't be respected. Same diff. If he insists on a form of communication so he knows to stop if, for example, you've broken a bone, then you would be wise to work something out with him, because he's insisting from a place of compassion and care. Yeah for real already[8\|].... If you used your safe word BUT then you REALLY still wanted him to continue, THEN STOP SAYING YOUR SAFE WORD!!! until you REALLY REALLY mean it. Try to enjoy the ride...

YoursMistress -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 3:05:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Musicmystery Hell, better than half the vanilla women I know have this fantasy. Good God! I have no ideas what the fantasies of 1% of the women I know! Perhaps we can compare lists and you can fill me in on any of our mutual friends. [;)] yours

leadership527 -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 3:10:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Musicmystery quote: ORIGINAL: mienliebte I recently came to the conclusion that I WANT my master to rape me. Am I alone in this? Hell, better than half the vanilla women I know have this fantasy. laughs I was thinking that same thing. So yeah, Seems pretty normal to me. A quick pass through the romance section in the book store would also tell the tale.

Jeptha -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 7:51:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GreedyTop No.. you are not. COMMUNICATE. Tell him what you've said here. Explain that by wanting him to do this that you are giving him consent.... I agree. It might take several discussions for a picture to emerge that he can get his head around. Be careful what you wish for, too! It might be a good approach to experiment incrementally (tho I know people often prefer to dive right into the deep end.)

army101 -> RE: am i normal? (5/23/2009 8:57:26 PM)
Hey? Its called "roleplay" okay? When you both want to play agree on one word only that will mean do me take me Rape me! Of course a good Master will never bring you harm but should bring you joy and pleasure as you need it. Communicate with him as a lot of us cant read minds anymore. And have fun!

Focus50 -> RE: am i normal? (5/24/2009 3:20:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RedMagic1 quote: ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf Not every relationship has a safeword. Just remove the obstacle. I agree. Play without a safe word. Or play with a "safe word" that won't be respected. Same diff. If he insists on a form of communication so he knows to stop if, for example, you've broken a bone, then you would be wise to work something out with him, because he's insisting from a place of compassion and care. Just so I'm reading this correctly.... First paragraph, you say get rid of their safeword. And second paragraph, you're advocating the wisdom of introducing what is, in fact, a safeword? Focus.

Zechriel -> RE: am i normal? (5/24/2009 4:10:12 AM)
Good morning! I also have this fantasy and for most of it, Master has played with me, holding me down and manhandling me. However, due to physical reasons, we have not actually penetrated yet. But you are fine, talk, or is you are like me where talking gets me so embarrassed that I blush and hide my face, write a letter, an e-mail where you can go back and delete and really get your words right. Daddy always lets me write him, he just will wait until in person to discusss it with me(he hates writing mail). But for me, writing works awesome in communication. I think you need to re-define what your safeword is used for. I have no limits (Daddy does so therefore I defer to his...his words) But I can yell out or say at ANY time..even not during play, "Daddy I am scared." Not only does it let him know immediately what my feelings are but it turns on his "Daddy" alert. He always calms me thru it and pats my head and reassures me and most often proceeds. Sometimes he will let me use the blindfold knowing that it is like my security blanket. What I cannot see, I cannot be afraid of. That is where trust comes in. Our safeword is for "cramp, charley horse, can't breath,can't feel my nipples anymore, gonna fall off the bed.." that sort of thing. It has nothing to do with being scared or nervous. I hope that helps a bit. Take things slow and talk and you will be fine. Good luck! Love, Zechriel [sm=couple.gif]

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