RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant)

RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (Full Version)

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MHOO314 -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 12:54:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold quote: ORIGINAL: naughtynick I couldn't agree with you more. A lot of dommes in here are all talk and no action. See, it all depends on which side of the whip you are? I have found that most boys are all action, and no talk. And considering those are the closing lines in his profile--I would find it hard to take him seriously---I might direct him to the thread on Utopia...

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 12:56:01 PM)
quote: quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold quote: ORIGINAL: naughtynick I couldn't agree with you more. A lot of dommes in here are all talk and no action. See, it all depends on which side of the whip you are? I have found that most boys are all action, and no talk. How can we be “no talk” when we always get criticized for having a keep wank for the things guys say on here? I thought guys are always the culprits when it comes to cyber chat. I'll translate. All action no talk means that a LOT of boys on here want play but no trappings of a relationship, hence relegating Dommes to the role of "life support system for a whip" rather than a whole person who is more than the sum of our fetishes.

naughtynick -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 12:57:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold quote: ORIGINAL: naughtynick I couldn't agree with you more. A lot of dommes in here are all talk and no action. See, it all depends on which side of the whip you are? I have found that most boys are all action, and no talk. And considering those are the closing lines in his profile--I would find it hard to take him seriously---I might direct him to the thread on Utopia... I would find it hard to take him seriously? Why?

MHOO314 -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:06:03 PM)
quote: I would find it hard to take him seriously? Why? yadda yadda yadda why do I bother. Most women in here are all talk and no action anyway. :-/ Why would a Domme bother to contact someone who from get go is negative? That is why I would not take you seriously--no matter how articulate, how well schooled, or how submisssive--that one line would remove you from the list---IMHO

naughtynick -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:11:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 quote: I would find it hard to take him seriously? Why? yadda yadda yadda why do I bother. Most women in here are all talk and no action anyway. :-/ Why would a Domme bother to contact someone who from get go is negative? That is why I would not take you seriously--no matter how articulate, how well schooled, or how submisssive--that one line would remove you from the list---IMHO I find a lot of domme profiles to be negative also. Are they allowed to be negative but not me? For example look at this profile http://www.collarme.com/bdsm/v/229521/default.htm Now imagine if a male dom had a profile like this but he used the word misandrist instead of misogynist?

naughtynick -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:15:26 PM)
By the way, I have nothing against that person in that profile that I gave a link to. But I do find it negative. I have no reason to dislike her for it.

MHOO314 -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:24:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: naughtynick quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 quote: I would find it hard to take him seriously? Why? yadda yadda yadda why do I bother. Most women in here are all talk and no action anyway. :-/ Why would a Domme bother to contact someone who from get go is negative? That is why I would not take you seriously--no matter how articulate, how well schooled, or how submisssive--that one line would remove you from the list---IMHO I find a lot of domme profiles to be negative also. Are they allowed to be negative but not me? For example look at this profile http://www.collarme.com/bdsm/v/229521/default.htm Now imagine if a male dom had a profile like this but he used the word misandrist instead of misogynist? You are not a Dom, you are a submissive, seeking the favor of a Domme/Domina--profiles may seek to demonstrate preferences which the one you posted does (which may get you in a tad of Mod trouble)--yours makes a sweeping generality--huge difference. I also think the "they did it why can't I"---does not allow your unique individuality to shine through--be a pack of one, not one of a pack. Simply food for thought to help you find what you seek... edited to use a collective pronoun

naughtynick -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:32:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 quote: ORIGINAL: naughtynick quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 quote: I would find it hard to take him seriously? Why? From what I said in my profile is no different to saying "no time wasters". I just make it very clear that I don't tolerate time wasters, simple. I think a sub, bottom, or slave is entitled to point out very strictly that they don't want their time to be wasted. This just makes the domme know that I am for real and not just all show. A domme who is not a time waster should find nothing wrong to what I said. yadda yadda yadda why do I bother. Most women in here are all talk and no action anyway. :-/ Why would a Domme bother to contact someone who from get go is negative? That is why I would not take you seriously--no matter how articulate, how well schooled, or how submisssive--that one line would remove you from the list---IMHO I find a lot of domme profiles to be negative also. Are they allowed to be negative but not me? For example look at this profile http://www.collarme.com/bdsm/v/229521/default.htm Now imagine if a male dom had a profile like this but he used the word misandrist instead of misogynist? You are not a Dom, you are a submissive, seeking the favor of a Domme/Domina--profiles may seek to demostrate preferences which the one you posted does (which may get you in a tad of Mod trouble)--yours makes a sweeping generality--huge difference. I also think the "they did it why can't I"---does not allow your unique individuality shine through--be a pack of one, not one of a pack. Simply food for thought to help you find what you seek... edited to use a collective pronoun From what I said in my profile is no different to saying "no time wasters". I just make it very clear that I don't tolerate time wasters, simple. I think a sub, bottom, or slave is entitled to point out very strictly that they don't want their time to be wasted. This just makes the domme know that I am for real and not just all show. A domme who is not a time waster should find nothing wrong to what I said.

MHOO314 -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:37:42 PM)
You did not say, please don't waste my time--you said "most women on here are all talk and no action"--- IMHO, a difference--but that remains to be seen--

naughtynick -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:51:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 You did not say, please don't waste my time--you said "most women on here are all talk and no action"--- IMHO, a difference--but that remains to be seen-- I said that because that's all I have experienced so far. I wouldn't have a reason to say it if I have not had people wasting my time. As I said, the women who are not time wasters should not have a problem with this. When a time waster looks at my profile, she wont bother me and that's what I want.

MHOO314 -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 1:53:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: naughtynick quote: ORIGINAL: MHOO314 You did not say, please don't waste my time--you said "most women on here are all talk and no action"--- IMHO, a difference--but that remains to be seen-- I said that because that's all I have experienced so far. I wouldn't have a reason to say it if I have not had people wasting my time. As I said, the women who are not time wasters should not have a problem with this. When a time waster looks at my profile, she wont bother me and that's what I want. I wish you well, may you find what you seek--welcome to CM and the boards--martinis anyone?

naughtynick -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 2:00:33 PM)
I changed it, just so everyone is happy YAY. I changed it to, I am sick of people in here being all talk and no action. Now that should put a big smile on your face.

stef -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 2:00:47 PM)
Your profile gives off a distinct whiff of "DO ME!" All you talk about are the things that you want done to you and make no mention at all of what you have to offer in a prospective relationship. When you add to that your closing line, it's going to be a big turn off to many of the people whose attention you're seeking. You really shouldn't be surprised at that. On the scale of honey and vinegar, your profile has a strong leaning towards the latter. Consider sharing a little more about yourself instead of what you want done to you, and you might get some better responses. Good luck. ~stef

Beatmehrdr -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 2:10:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: veronicaofML just move on to the next one and chalk it up to one more idiot Honestly, while the exchange was frustrating, it hasn't turned me off of the search to meet someone. I made a contact on CollarMe before that went rather well. I guess the one difference is that we subs are a bit less jaded than the Dommes are when it comes to wankers, we take someone at face value right off. Like I've said before, there are plenty of fish in the sea, and meeting a Domme isn't all that different from meeting someone in a vanilla venue. Talk, meet, see if there is chemistry, and go from there.

naughtynick -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 2:12:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stef Your profile gives off a distinct whiff of "DO ME!" All you talk about are the things that you want done to you and make no mention at all of what you have to offer in a prospective relationship. When you add to that your closing line, it's going to be a big turn off to many of the people whose attention you're seeking. You really shouldn't be surprised at that. On the scale of honey and vinegar, your profile has a strong leaning towards the latter. Consider sharing a little more about yourself instead of what you want done to you, and you might get some better responses. Good luck. ~stef What I say in my profile seeks the attention of female tops who have the same fantasy as me except they like being the one in control. If the woman likes doing this, why do you label it as a "DO ME"? What's the point if the woman does not get turned on also? It's like a sub or slave that says he likes to be spanked or likes to worship feet. The domme agrees to do it because she gets pleasure out of it also. I don't expect a woman to do it without getting pleasure also. She has to like what she is doing to go ahead with it. The women who don't see this as a turn on, see me as a "DO ME" The women who do see this as a turn on gets pleasure out of this as much as I do. Everyone has their different kinks. I am willing to try new things that the top wants also. So NO I am not a "DO ME, any mistress that wants a person to do house work or what ever would label me as a "DO ME" ,simply because I don't have the same type of desires as them. People seem shallow about this.

Beatmehrdr -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 2:19:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood quote: Now I have to get going. I see a woman in leather boots out at the bus stop, so by rule 17 in the New Subs Manual, I have to develop my raging hardon, fall at her knees, and throw my ass in the air No offense, but that's basically what you did by responding to her like a dog in heat, and immediately saying you wanted to meet her and serve her. You may want to go back and read this thread if you haven't already. http://www.collarchat.com/m_256661/tm.htm At what point did either of you talk to each other like human beings, a necessary component if you are both going to behave and meet like human beings? Your dialogue seems like it was all kink-oriented on both sides which leads me to believe that 1. she fit into the categories of the above link (fake/male/etc) and 2. you need to brush up your own skills on how to speak to a Domme when you first connect. Actually, I had read that thread. That was why I was trying to push for a vanilla meeting first. I was a bit uncomfortable with the "Your my slave, fall to you knees!" tone at the outset. It seemed a bit unbalanced, to be quite honest. But I also figured, since the person had only been online for about 6 months, that perhaps it was inexperience as well. I tried to go with the flow a bit, and see what developed. She looked attractive, our kinks meshed fairly well, so I thought there might be some chemistry if we met R/T. However, she really was only looking for someone to fill her online fantasies only, but wasn't honest enough to come out and say it.

GoddessDustyGold -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 3:31:35 PM)
In all fairness to naughtynick, he has not been around that long, and he has been on the boards questioning his fantasy needs and his particular brand of search. He is now appropriately identifying as a bottom who is only interested in starting out with his main fantasy, and perhaps finding a few more fetishes along the way. But he is not seeking a relationship with specific submission. It might be a "do me" situation that is distasteful to the bulk of the Ladies here, but he is being honest and he just might find someone who is up for his fantasy. In all fairness to the Dominas here, naughtynick, you need to learn to separate your needs from the general questions on the board, especially in the Ask A Mistress forum. We are primarily seeking relationships which involve a good amount of submission and the fetish play is just a perk. So it doesn't help your case to say that most of the people you have run into are all talk and no action. These ladies want the talk, before they will even consider the action. You are much more focused in one area. It is fine for you to be so, but it is not the best idea to jump into a discussion that really doesn't apply to your situation, and try to force it to apply to your situation. Am I making any sense here?

veronicaofML -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 3:36:36 PM)
You are much more focused in one area. It is fine for you to be so, but it is not the best idea to jump into a discussion that really doesn't apply to your situation, and try to force it to apply to your situation. Am I making any sense here? -------- and not knowing nick... maybe? just maybe? the dude aint into talking. there ARE some people on this planet that are not much for talking. Dusty...a lot of folks know "I" got a big mouth.. but you should see SOME of the guys MY Ms gets...a lot of them dont know HOW to talk i only hope nick does okay

LadyJulieAnn -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 6:13:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Beatmehrdr I think I now understand the frustration you Dommes feel when it comes to online wankers, because I think it just happened to me, only in reverse. A few days ago, I get an email(with a rather revealing photo) via Collarme from a Domme who tells me she likes a boy who knows what he needs, that my pain would be her pleasure, and that she expects my submission to her whim. I don't know of too many serious lifestyle Dommes who will approach a sub with a revealing photo and orders to obey her. quote: {rant} Under what rule does it say that just because a woman prefaces her name with the word Mistress, that I as a sub am compelled to get a raging hardon and present my ass into the air for any Trish, Dottie or Harriet at a moment's notice? Also, under what CollarMe rule of etiquette am I as a male sub required to spend time crafting the masturbatory fantasies of anyone who happens to type out the words "Mistress So and So" in their profile or emails?!? Of course there is no rule. You appear to have seriously taken an email exhcange that started out with a revealing picture and orders to submit to her every whim. Most of the serious lifestyle Dommes I know don't need to start out demanding anything from someone they don't know. I would guess if you looked back at her emails to you, she was very vague about herself. She also ignored your suggestions to meet in person. I realize the excitement that might develop from having a Domme be the one to initiate contact, but rather than jump into something headlong because of a picture and demanding tone, perhaps take a step back and look at the situation realistically. I wish you luck in your search, Julie

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: OK, I think I get it now(a mini-rant) (2/9/2006 6:59:47 PM)
I like your profile, and I don't think it's a "do me" situation since you clearly state you are a bottom seeking a female top with whom to experience these sensations. From my perspective as a fem domme something like that wouldn't work because I seek a relationship with a man who is submissive, after which point we can play out some fantasies, but I like the honest effort even realizing that approach of let's meet and do each other won't work for most women. M

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