Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

masochist or pain slut?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> masochist or pain slut? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
masochist or pain slut? - 6/4/2009 4:11:02 PM   
serisa


Posts: 219
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline 		Please could anyone explain explain to me the difference between a masochist and a pain slut?.  For me personally i dont think i could tolerate heavy pain but love the way some strokes or lashes of a cane and whip makes me feel.  That is not to say it does not hurt because it does and sometimes i clench and feel tense about awaiting it.  However,  i want it more because it feels so good,. that is not so much at the time but the after glow and warmth of the strike.  The next day also,  i will still be touching the welts because it feels so good.  Sometimes i wish i could take more than realistically what i can handle... but because the aftergow is so good, and i sometimes feel frustrated with myself at the time because i wish to take more... but at the moment dont really feel that i can.

Just confused to what i am and wishing i could take more.  thanks xx
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/4/2009 4:15:11 PM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		Most people use the term pain slut for someone who just can't get enough.  While many may be masochistic to some extent they may not get any true arousal from the pain itself.  Then there are those who long for pain more than anything else within the relationship.  It is simply a matter of degree and you will find that the definition tends to vary some from relationship to relationship.

_____________________________



(in reply to serisa)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/4/2009 4:31:35 PM   
Viridana


Posts: 754
Status: offline 		I disagree.

To me masochist and pain slut are interchangeable in reference to intensity or frequency. Pain slut is usually considered a more derogatory term and works well for those who like a bit of humiliation spice with their spankings.

For me, humiliation or even the slightest hint of domination in sessions is a total turnoff. Therefore I don't like to use the term to describe myself. But by your definition I should only want moderate amounts of pain or that I can't me a masochist thriving on pain and that just isn't true.

(in reply to chamberqueen)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/4/2009 7:58:39 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Just confused to what i am

Stop.

Does it matter that you have a label to identify yourself? Can't you just say " I like pain and sometimes I really like pain and want more"?

Don't let the labels confuse you. Just be who you are, be honest about who you are, and enjoy who you are.

WHAT you are does not matter one fucking bit.

< Message edited by IrishMist -- 6/4/2009 7:59:15 PM >

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to serisa)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/4/2009 8:19:19 PM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline
quote:

the difference between a masochist and a pain slut


Masochist is well defined in the dictionary. Slut denotes a connection with sexual arousal, in whatever way one practices that. Masochism, in the official sense, is not in any way related to sexual practice.

(in reply to serisa)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/4/2009 10:22:09 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		On a personal basis I use and have seen used here in Australia, the term painslut as referring to and extreme masochist. 

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 1:01:52 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

quote:

the difference between a masochist and a pain slut


Masochist is well defined in the dictionary. Slut denotes a connection with sexual arousal, in whatever way one practices that. Masochism, in the official sense, is not in any way related to sexual practice.



Wrong! http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/masochist

A masochist gets sexual pleasure though pain
A pain slut get sexual pleasure through pain

They both mean the same thing but just named differently

As for the ops concerns all I can say is, its not a competition. Taking more pain does not make you any better than someone who can't take a lot. You just don't need a sadist for a playmate and for gods sake don't start listening to those numpties that say your not a 'REAL' submissive if you can't take a lot of pain. Remember that many submissives take no pain at all.

If its for a description in your profile you could say

Im a submissive with light masochistic tendencies


_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 3:30:15 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		*Nod at Maria*

The proper term of Masochist is pleasure through recieving pain and sadist is pleasure through giving pain.

OP you can build up pain tolerance, it is just about gradually increasing it, but I know what you mean. I do not consider myself a masochist at all, I do not crave pain (oh unless with a sadist because then i do, odd really) but generally I dont however I adore the feelings afterwards, I love the look of the bruises and I love the pride I feel and i always wish I could take more also however we are who we are, we do not have to fit anything as IrishMist said, you just have to be you.

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 4:01:58 AM   
Viridana


Posts: 754
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


Wrong! http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/masochist

A masochist gets sexual pleasure though pain
A pain slut get sexual pleasure through pain



And what pray then is the definition and label of a person who loves pain but does not get sexual arousal from it?

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 4:25:56 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

Just confused to what i am

Stop.

Does it matter that you have a label to identify yourself? Can't you just say " I like pain and sometimes I really like pain and want more"?

Don't let the labels confuse you. Just be who you are, be honest about who you are, and enjoy who you are.

WHAT you are does not matter one fucking bit.
i completely agree!!


_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 4:50:05 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Viridana

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


Wrong! http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/masochist

A masochist gets sexual pleasure though pain
A pain slut get sexual pleasure through pain



And what pray then is the definition and label of a person who loves pain but does not get sexual arousal from it?



Mad? .......... just kidding
I get no sexual kick out of pain but I do get a sexual kick from the thought of pain and I do get a sexual kick after that pain is over. That in my view still makes me a masochist because somewhere along the line (even though its not the action) gives me a sexual high.
Someone who gets no sexual arrousal at any point is (in my opinion) doing this for there own A-sexual reasons and what that is........ I have not a clue. I have met one such person and he wasn't able to explain what he got out of it. Perhaps there are some A-sexual s here that could?

< Message edited by allthatjaz -- 6/5/2009 4:51:27 AM >

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to Viridana)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 5:00:43 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		I don't get any kind of a sexual response from pain. My whole reason behind it is that pain allows me to let go of the violence in me; I use the pain in that respect. The more pain, the more I can let go. Nothing sexual about it at all though.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 5:54:54 AM   
Christinestill


Posts: 1199
Joined: 12/4/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

I don't get any kind of a sexual response from pain. My whole reason behind it is that pain allows me to let go of the violence in me; I use the pain in that respect. The more pain, the more I can let go. Nothing sexual about it at all though.


that is perfect!  this is exactly how i am but have never been able to explain or express it to anyone this clearly.  thanks girl, now i'll be able to.

_____________________________

"Ya can't be scared if you're laughing!" -lushy

Learning to color outside the the lines a little more each day.

yes i'm pro-gun, i'm not about to sit around with a fucking rolling pin and hope for the best.


(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 10:31:03 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

I don't get any kind of a sexual response from pain. My whole reason behind it is that pain allows me to let go of the violence in me; I use the pain in that respect. The more pain, the more I can let go. Nothing sexual about it at all though.


Thanks IrishMist .... this makes sense

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos


Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 10:34:23 AM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Pain makes my pussy wet!!!!

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 10:43:50 AM   
Viridana


Posts: 754
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

quote:

ORIGINAL: Viridana

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz


Wrong! http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/masochist

A masochist gets sexual pleasure though pain
A pain slut get sexual pleasure through pain



And what pray then is the definition and label of a person who loves pain but does not get sexual arousal from it?



Mad? .......... just kidding
I get no sexual kick out of pain but I do get a sexual kick from the thought of pain and I do get a sexual kick after that pain is over. That in my view still makes me a masochist because somewhere along the line (even though its not the action) gives me a sexual high.
Someone who gets no sexual arrousal at any point is (in my opinion) doing this for there own A-sexual reasons and what that is........ I have not a clue. I have met one such person and he wasn't able to explain what he got out of it. Perhaps there are some A-sexual s here that could?


So people who like pain, but don't get sexually aroused by it are automatically asexuals?
What about people who are very much sexual, very much sexually healthy and active but enjoy pain in a non sexual matter?


I know I'm pinching you a little with those questions but the definition of a masochist is without any reference of sexual arousal. I don't really care what your online dictionary says but the word "sexual" was taken out of the definition used by psychologist and pshychiatrics, and people in general years ago, just as a fetish was formerly defined as a non-living thing that a person had to have to obtain orgasm is now sans the orgasm part, albeit many dictionaries have yet to make the update.  Your answers and definitions seem pretty unthought out to me, since by using those you exclude a whole bunch of people and assume asexuality in them without really having anything to back it up. Kind of a pseudosectioning... sectioning things in to different categories that really all belong in the same one.


I can tell you from personal experience as a non-asexual masochist who receives no sexual arousal or sexual pleasure from pain.... that for me it is the adrenaline and endorphine rush that is appealing. Feeling the pain transmit through the nerves and the adrenaline surge that ensues. Getting the endorphine high and then the zen-like relaxation when it's over. Sexual arousal for me in an endorphine state is impossible.... many fellow masochists that I regulary converse with describe the same scenario. We non sexual masochists are actually quite many..... most bdsm-ers just haven't bothered to look.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 10:44:35 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		As a Dominant with sadistic tendencies I get no pleasure, sexual or otherwise, in the actual giving of pain but I do get both satisfaction in the giving of pain if I do it to the level and standards I expect from myself. I also get sexual pleasure in both watching some pain being given as well as watching a slave after a pain session.

My only masochistic side comes out when being involved in such activities such as medieval combat and whilst not enjoying pain from a well timed and aimed strike, I get pleasure after and view the pain and welts etc including bloodied wounds which happen occasionally from a well fought combat session. same with duelinmg and of course there is also the sadistic pleasure in inflicting the same on my oponents especially when I leave a scar on the cheek after a duel with razored rapuers. Mind you this has nothing at all to do with BDSM but I just added it as an after thought. 

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 1:29:51 PM   
Cdub2U


Posts: 69
Joined: 9/20/2006
Status: offline

How funny.

I love it when people try to place a label on human behavior, as if we are all the same.


_____________________________

"Free your mind and your ass will follow
the kingdom of heaven is within"
G. Clinton

"Can't you see, it all makes perfect sense
Expressed in Dollars and cents, Pounds shillings and pence"
R. Waters

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 1:32:47 PM   
Cdub2U


Posts: 69
Joined: 9/20/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Pain makes my pussy wet!!!!


My former sub would be soaked and at times I would get hard as stone. With others there is nothing sexual at all... much like a job you enjoy.


_____________________________

"Free your mind and your ass will follow
the kingdom of heaven is within"
G. Clinton

"Can't you see, it all makes perfect sense
Expressed in Dollars and cents, Pounds shillings and pence"
R. Waters

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: masochist or pain slut? - 6/5/2009 8:51:43 PM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cdub2U

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Pain makes my pussy wet!!!!


My former sub would be soaked and at times I would get hard as stone. With others there is nothing sexual at all... much like a job you enjoy.




Must say no prior employment has made me wet before

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to Cdub2U)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> masochist or pain slut? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094