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Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:09:31 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		I awoke to one of those darn one-liner emails this morning (and before My coffee too)--that says "so why do you have a profile?"---now I am not here to dispute the email rudeness but rather capture the feelings of the group here:

Many of us have had profiles ever since we joined, so we don't feel the need to remove them when W/we connect--we update it but continue to use it to keep a presence--I for one want people to know there is a real person posting and My blog has become important to Me as an outlet--

but what is the consensus? If someone is involved/collared--should the profile be removed to allow for "cleaner searches by others"?

Minor in life's scheme of things--but inquiring minds want to know---

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:15:35 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		Hmm, I have had a profile since joining, it has changed more times than I care to admit, but it's still there. Personally, I like seeing in a persons profile that they are with someone, knowing that they are happy...it also kind of helps when I send a question to someone lol. I feel more comfortable knowing that they have a SO and that my question will not be taken out of context.

I have had so many tell me that I should remove my profile from the site simply because I state that I am not interested in meeting anyone.

/shrug

I just ignore them for the most part, or if I am feeling in a really bitchy mood, I respond with my thoughts on their oh so thoughtful comments

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:18:03 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

If someone is involved/collared--should the profile be removed to allow for "cleaner searches by others"?


Frankly, I think if someone takes the time to search, read your profile, and find that you're not what he or she is looking for, that they should be thankful that it was that simple.

As for those that get annoyed because they read a profile and the person says they aren't looking or otherwise aren't what they are looking for....should just get the hell over it. They deserve the angst they cause themselves.

I'll have Elizabeth's olives, thankyouverymuch.

< Message edited by MsSonnetMarwood -- 2/11/2006 9:20:55 AM >

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:22:24 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		The only thing I might change on mine if I meet my girl and stop seeking is a note at the top of my profile saying "Not seeking" and switch activly seeking to "Just friends" rather than "Female sub"

If they don't like it beyond that, tough, not my problem.

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:27:30 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

The only thing I might change on mine if I meet my girl and stop seeking is a note at the top of my profile saying "Not seeking" and switch activly seeking to "Just friends" rather than "Female sub"

If they don't like it beyond that, tough, not my problem.



Thanks Raven as always a wealth of info, I forgot to go change My tickie mark--

<changes selections and goes off to get another jar of olives>

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:38:12 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314
Thanks Raven as always a wealth of info, I forgot to go change My tickie mark--

<changes selections and goes off to get another jar of olives>

Glad I helped.

But yes, those two things I'd see as basic consideration. But turning your profile off. I see no reason to do so and certainly won't be doing so myself.

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 11:04:32 AM   
krikket


Posts: 1183
Joined: 11/17/2004
From: Washington, DC Metro Area
Status: offline 		Personally i don't see any reason to take down your profile just because "you're not looking for a partner". i enjoy reading a little about the people in the forums (and chat), but that's just me. The one thing i don't understand is when you put a profile up, even ones that say NO MEN, or NOT LOOKING, people should be aware that some see that as a "dare", and almost guarantees that someone's gonna write. i saw one not long ago that said no men cuz it made her master mad, but..there must have been half a dozen (maybe more) pics of her that could only best be described as provocative (various stages of undress and sexy poses, etc.). Now, my thought on that is, if they're gonna show those kinds of pictures, shouldn't they expect some kind of reaction? Yes, they have every right to show them, but if they truly want to avoid getting emails there's a section where you can have certain mail go directly into your trash bin. Or, if you can't stand the idea of NOT knowing what was said in the letter, and you just can't ignore it (which would be me..lol), read the email then put the poster on ignore. You won't even get em then.. soooooooo many easy solutions to the problems that just aren't that world altering to begin with.

just my wooden nickel's worth..

jimini

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 11:11:58 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I love reading profiles and journals.....I'm a bit of a junkie about it.
Anyone who wants a profile should have one, regardless of their status.
And really, a profile is only as honest as the person writing it. Just remember that.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 11:33:32 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		My profile will remain irrespective if I'm looking or not looking. It is a way for people who want to know more about me to get a profile before they decide to contact me on a social basis.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 11:53:38 AM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		It's nice, here on the boards, when I can look at the profile of the poster. I can get an idea of where they are coming from if I know more about who they are.

I can think of a few recent incidences where I have taken a person/post seriously or simply tossed out their opinion based on whether or not they have a profile, or, what that profile consisted of.

As far as the other side is concerned...we have recently heard this argument that if you aren't looking you shouldn't have a profile. Well, ok, but I am looking for likeminded people to share thoughts and ideas with, as well as broaden the scope of the BDSM community that I associate with, as well as looking for subs/slaves and play partners. I don't remember anything in the TOS saying that this was a dating site only....

_____________________________

Tress


"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 12:20:50 PM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I awoke to one of those darn one-liner emails this morning (and before My coffee too)--that says "so why do you have a profile?"---now I am not here to dispute the email rudeness but rather capture the feelings of the group here:

Many of us have had profiles ever since we joined, so we don't feel the need to remove them when W/we connect--we update it but continue to use it to keep a presence--I for one want people to know there is a real person posting and My blog has become important to Me as an outlet--

but what is the consensus? If someone is involved/collared--should the profile be removed to allow for "cleaner searches by others"?

Minor in life's scheme of things--but inquiring minds want to know---


I thought that once you found someone, you would delete your profile, not post anymore, and completely forget about the rest of us as if we never existed. Also, didn't you know that once you are "with" another person in a union, you cease being an individual with any individualistic needs or curiosities. Why? Well, because you've become unionized.

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 12:38:22 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

I thought that once you found someone, you would delete your profile, not post anymore, and completely forget about the rest of us as if we never existed. Also, didn't you know that once you are "with" another person in a union, you cease being an individual with any individualistic needs or curiosities. Why? Well, because you've become unionized.



W/we are as O/one but we made a commitment never to abandon friends or family--and this is a home for U/us as well---smiles

Besides like MissTress, I like to know there is someone behind the posts--someone with definition to them--besides cloudboy, how could W/we ever miss out on everyone's growth---

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 12:39:41 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

but what is the consensus? If someone is involved/collared--should the profile be removed to allow for "cleaner searches by others"?


It's not my job to make life easier for anyone other than Himself. I'm listed seeking friends only. That's the extent of my responsibility to anyone else. My profile and journals clearly mark me as collared, but that doesn't stop the slut/pig, get on your knees emails from coming through. Personally, I adore getting those, because that's when I can turn into LotaTruble and not get into any truble at all from Himself. I'm allowed to write two emails back, then I'm to block. I have sooooo much fun with it.

::chuckles::

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 12:42:58 PM   
foxglove716


Posts: 648
Joined: 7/4/2005
Status: offline 		Funny, the people who complain about profiles are the same ones who dont read them

_____________________________

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. -Oscar Wilde

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 2:40:22 PM   
Real0ne


Posts: 21189
Joined: 10/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MHOO314

I awoke to one of those darn one-liner emails this morning (and before My coffee too)--that says "so why do you have a profile?"---now I am not here to dispute the email rudeness but rather capture the feelings of the group here:

but what is the consensus? If someone is involved/collared--should the profile be removed to allow for "cleaner searches by others"?

Minor in life's scheme of things--but inquiring minds want to know---


well the cleaner search issue is really up to cm web designers, its their bandwidth being wasted when people search profiles that are for all intents and purposes inactive.

Personally i dont feel you should remove your profile at all but i think its courteous to say on top or in the last journal entry no looking so people dont have to read the profile in its entirity to find that out.

If they dont do it to section off the pros which are a big contention by many on here i highly doubt they will do it to section off the not seeking.

However that could easily be done in their search pages as a check box too.

view notseekingprofiles
view pro dommes
then on your profile add another box that says:
actively seeking no one. LOL
and on for the pros:
offering prof services box

very simple stuff really.

no i do not feel anyone should remove their profile when they find someone and i think you have to have one to post to the forums anyway.

i am sure that you get a lot of people who are from dating sites on here and on the dating sites typically a profile is removed when they find someone and of course some are just forgotten about and remain on the system because it makes a better appearance for headcount. LOL or they could care less about the bandwidth anyway.

my vote is for leave it on!

of course the millions of people on dial up could certainly make a good case for better filters or removal.




_____________________________

"We the Borg" of the us imperialists....resistance is futile

Democracy; The 'People' voted on 'which' amendment?

Yesterdays tinfoil is today's reality!

"No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session

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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 3:04:16 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: foxglove716

Funny, the people who complain about profiles are the same ones who dont read them



THAT is too true!

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to foxglove716)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 7:05:53 PM   
spoiledbrat


Posts: 75
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline


Hello,

Since I have redone my profile several times due to changes in my life, I feel it is appropriate for one to either add that they are no longer collared or looking. Or for the lucky add that they have become the Property of.........

Why waste someone's time and energy, don't let someone take the time to send you a lovely email and have them receive a response saying "owned"

That shows very little respect I think to all the people that might find the one they are writing attractive.

_____________________________

Love Always
Me
Spoiledbrat

Like our Favorite Black Dress
Character
Never goes out of style


Autumn
Spoiledbrat


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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 8:41:46 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline 		I am one who enjoys seeing the profiles of regular posters on this side. I like learning just a little more like age, orientation, where someone lives, and even what some of their extra-curricular activities might be. And, as mentioned, being able to see how a person presents him/herself in profile is a good way to answer some of the most common questions that come up on the board.
I am currently not seeking, and have listed for friends only. Doesn't stop the hopeful mail the continues to crowd My email box, but that's okay, since we often find good friends or even a significant relationship when we are least expecting it. And I have often heard from regular posters on this side. I have to admit it makes Me feel good to know that My posts gave some boy the courage to write and ask Me a lifestyle question on a more personal level.
I know there are some who think it is a waste of their precious, personal time to have to even spend 3 seconds moving past the next profile that, usually, clearly states "Not Seeking" or "Owned". It makes Me laugh to think that the same person who was annoyed that you had a profile that just wasted his time took the additional time to write to you about his displeasure. It also amazes Me is that so many of them find their way to these boards so they can rant about it.
Well, let's see...at last count: No Pro Dommes, no tribute seekers, no submissives who are already owned, no Doms or Dominas who are already in a relationship, and definitely no one at all who is not sitting at their computer day and night ready, willing and eager to engage in instant chat or immediately answer *all* emails regardless of whether you just spent your precious 3 seconds opening a mail that says nothing but "hi" or "u r hot!"
*Sadly watches the collarme membership dwindling away to nothing*

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:11:19 PM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline
quote:

but what is the consensus? If someone is involved/collared--should the profile be removed to allow for "cleaner searches by others"?


Absolutely not... I know many will disagree, but like Dusty, I like to read the profiles too. Unless you are happily married, I think you are selling yourself short by removing your profile. And while I think the profile is a valuable tool, until it's ''mano e mano'' and you get to look the other side in the eyes, you need to remember that all does, is get one foot in the door.


JMHO


- The Ranger


_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


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RE: Thoughts on Profiles - 2/11/2006 9:14:34 PM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline
quote:

but what is the consensus? If someone is involved/collared--should the profile be removed to allow for "cleaner searches by others"?


Absolutely not... I know many will disagree, but like Dusty, I like to read the profiles. Unless you are happily married, I think you are selling yourself short by removing your profile. And while I think the profile is a valuable tool, until it's ''mano e mano'' and you get to look the other side in the eyes, you need to remember that all does, is get one foot in the door.


JMHO


- The Ranger


_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


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