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name - 6/25/2009 4:10:54 PM

subage

Posts: 13
Joined: 4/24/2009
Status: offline

my Master and Mistress have many names for me and i am ok with then but when the call me "girl" it makes me feel like an object not a person. i am not good with saying how i feel or talking about things that bother me what i am trying to ask is how do i tell them with out just saying it ? ps this name i am useing in not my name that i use i just made it so i could post stuff and my Master and Mistress wouldnt know i did

Post #: 1

RE: name - 6/25/2009 4:21:31 PM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subage

my Master and Mistress have many names for me and i am ok with then but when the call me "girl" it makes me feel like an object not a person. i am not good with saying how i feel or talking about things that bother me what i am trying to ask is how do i tell them with out just saying it ? ps this name i am useing in not my name that i use i just made it so i could post stuff and my Master and Mistress wouldnt know i did

They enjoy objectifying you. You don't like it. You're not a good fit with them, in this respect. So while it is fullfilling for them, it is having the opposite effect on you. If you don't tell them, they'll never know. They're not mind readers. There is really no way to tell them exactly how you feel, without expressing it clearly in words. Summon the courage to tell them. One way is to write it down, if you are too timid to tell them to their face.

_____________________________

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(in reply to subage)

Post #: 2

RE: name - 6/25/2009 4:30:14 PM

Sybilla

Posts: 24
Joined: 6/6/2005
Status: offline

I don't care for being called "girl", either - particularly if it's used to indicate I'm somehow lesser than the person speaking to me. There are a few for whom I'll overlook it, but if it came from a person with whom I had a trusting relationship, I would tell them how I felt.

Why don't you want to speak plainly about it to them? They may not be aware of your feelings and/or it's possible they don't intend it to make you feel the way it does.

ETA: Oop. I just realized I asked a question you'd already answered. A better question then would be why not ask them for help with your difficulty communicating your feelings?

< Message edited by Sybilla -- 6/25/2009 4:39:44 PM >

(in reply to subage)

Post #: 3

RE: name - 6/25/2009 4:44:46 PM

brandi1379

Posts: 137
Joined: 3/3/2009
Status: offline

you should definitly talk to them about it.

(in reply to Sybilla)

Post #: 4

RE: name - 6/25/2009 4:54:00 PM

nevergrowdup

Posts: 86
Joined: 12/1/2007
Status: offline

I think I'd kind of like it if someone called me girl. Then again, I'm 50 years old now. :)

Like stated above by others, you shouldn't be afraid to speak up. If they are worthy of you, they will listen to your need and respect your wish. If they don't ... you need to seriously rethink your relationship with them. Sure, it's a risk ... but wouldn't you rather know now?

(in reply to subage)

Post #: 5

RE: name - 6/25/2009 5:03:28 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

how do i tell them with out just saying it ?...

learn sign language?
write a letter to them?
act it out in a game of charades?

(in reply to subage)

Post #: 6

RE: name - 6/25/2009 5:49:06 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

I guess you would have to talk to them about it. How else will they know it bothers you? Sir calls me "girl" and I don't mind at all because I know He loves me & isn't objectifying me, as He also calls me "sweetie" and "babypony." I would say talk to them about it. You almost have to. Oh, and welcome to the boards, even if it's not your usual name.

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to subage)

Post #: 7

RE: name - 6/25/2009 7:36:37 PM

MRandme

Posts: 661
Joined: 9/24/2007
Status: offline

Using 'girl' doesn't have to be about objectification. Have you asked why they call you that? It may be that for Them it is a pet name and meant with affection. That might be a way to open the conversation.

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Sweet be your dreams, may your happiness swell,
I'll leave you here, for my journey begins
i've gone to be with Him again...

(in reply to sweetsub1957)

Post #: 8

RE: name - 6/25/2009 7:39:19 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

especially if she has tits, it may show a sort of intriguing acumen that no one else possesses......

I mean he got that part right, who knows what else he can devine?

Andy Devine

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to MRandme)

Post #: 9

RE: name - 6/25/2009 8:03:15 PM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

Don't base your opinion on what they call you. Base it on how they treat you. Much more accurate.

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(in reply to subage)

Post #: 10

RE: name - 6/25/2009 8:12:07 PM

someone123

Posts: 2
Joined: 6/25/2009
Status: offline

you shouldn't be afraid to speak up.

i have been told that so many times. Master and Mistress have told me to tell them if something bothers me but speaking up is something i cant do if somethign bothers me i just keep it to my self untill it gets to me so bad that i go somewhere alone and cry that how i have aways been.

(in reply to nevergrowdup)

Post #: 11

RE: name - 6/25/2009 8:15:28 PM

someone123

Posts: 2
Joined: 6/25/2009
Status: offline

i was texting anything that i didnt have the courage Master and Mistress no longer read my text message

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 12

RE: name - 6/25/2009 8:38:52 PM

subage1

Posts: 1
Joined: 6/25/2009
Status: offline

how do it delet this this posting ? i messed it up and posted it under my the user name that my Master and Mistress know about

(in reply to someone123)

Post #: 13

RE: name - 6/25/2009 9:16:26 PM

playfulotter

Posts: 2195
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

My first Master in 2001 only called me "girl" the whole time we were together and when we were breaking up eight months later he called me by my first name...wow what a shock...everything is relative!

< Message edited by playfulotter -- 6/25/2009 9:17:03 PM >

(in reply to subage1)

Post #: 14

RE: name - 6/25/2009 9:52:10 PM

porcelaine

Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline

i concur you should speak to them. withholding it will only lead to your discomfort manifesting in a negative fashion at some point. while i love being objectified by the one i'm with, i have never cared for strangers calling me girl. i generally ignore the remark. for some reason it doesn't bother me if my owner does. go figure.

porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to playfulotter)

Post #: 15

RE: name - 6/25/2009 10:50:54 PM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

i messed it up and posted it under my the user name that my Master and Mistress know about

I have a headache

(in reply to subage1)

Post #: 16

RE: name - 6/25/2009 10:52:47 PM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

hahaha antipode, now I'm laughing myself silly. DarkSteven says that too. lmao!!

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to antipode)

Post #: 17

RE: name - 6/25/2009 11:20:02 PM

janiebelle

Posts: 332
Joined: 4/29/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

quote:

i messed it up and posted it under my the user name that my Master and Mistress know about

I have a headache

And here I was trying to shake the cobwebs out of my head. I'm glad to know it's not just me that thought this was getting a little convoluted.
Oh, and OP, I *adore* being called girl by a man. But if I didn't, well, I guess I would have only two choices- let him know, or suck it up.
j

(in reply to antipode)

Post #: 18

RE: name - 6/26/2009 5:19:33 AM

thishereboi

Posts: 14463
Joined: 6/19/2008
Status: offline

I would suggest finding a way to talk to them. Then tell them how you feel. Oh and at that point you can ask why your not being punished until sunday.

_____________________________

"Sweetie, you're wasting your gum" .. Albert

This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to subage)

Post #: 19

RE: name - 6/26/2009 9:41:31 AM

littleone35

Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline

You have to tell then otherwise how would they know? I love it when Master clls me HIS good girl. Maybe if it bothere you that much they might modify by callng you good girl (when you are) instead of just girl.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to thishereboi)

Post #: 20

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