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feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 7:57:58 AM   
vinylchick42


Posts: 13
Joined: 8/28/2008
Status: offline 		being fairly new to the wonderful world of BDSM i am curious as to what it means to be owned without the obvious physical collaring of someone.  does it mean i have been 'owned' if my mind swarms of thoughts of the Dom literly all day long?  or when i hear his ring tone on my phone and it causes an instant automatic rush of wetness in my panties? also making my heart race like a young girl on her first date. even after months of being with him, he still makes my palms sweat with giddy nervousness and excitement.

are these some feelings of being 'owned'?
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 8:03:28 AM   
Rainfire


Posts: 4047
Joined: 1/5/2009
Status: offline 		OP, when you're owned by that special person, you'll know it in your heart. I knew that I was completely owned by Lumus long before He ever put that first collar on my neck. You can be owned and not collared, that's between you two. It's not just a physical thing but emotional and mental.  The one thing I would do (and did do in fact) was wait for Him to make it official as my Master. You may feel like he owns you but depending on where you are in the relationship, it might not be reciprocated.

Good luck, I wish you all the best.


(edited to change a word, not sure if it would be take the wrong way....)


< Message edited by Rainfire -- 7/1/2009 8:04:43 AM >

_____________________________

"I have sold my soul to the devil for You, will You still love me when I am soiled, stained and souless in my love for You?
Or is this the beginning of the end?"
Proud member of the Clan Scarlett O'Hair

(in reply to vinylchick42)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 8:09:39 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		someone told me long, long ago

the collar is worn within long before it is ever placed around your pretty neck.

the physical collar just removes all doubt

smiles

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to Rainfire)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 8:31:22 AM   
Rainfire


Posts: 4047
Joined: 1/5/2009
Status: offline 		         

Yep, yep, yep..... and there comes that day when you feel the collar on your neck and it's not even on. When you just know that you are owned and the collar is just a physical symbol. At that time, there are no doubts, simply knowledge and confidence.


_____________________________

"I have sold my soul to the devil for You, will You still love me when I am soiled, stained and souless in my love for You?
Or is this the beginning of the end?"
Proud member of the Clan Scarlett O'Hair

(in reply to tazzygirl)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 8:47:42 AM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		My Master owns me, but so far, we've only used the collar during playtime, while we are together. If he chooses to give me a physical symbol at some point, that's great, but the ownership comes from the way we feel about each other, and how we express it.

(in reply to Rainfire)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 10:18:44 AM   
candisa


Posts: 127
Joined: 1/7/2008
Status: offline 		For me, the feeling of being owned was when I wanted to walk away, but could not. I wanted to run as fast as I could in any direction but in his, yet stayed standing still unable to even open the door. The mental hold he had on me was unlike anything I had ever felt before.
I knew I was free, the moment I got in my truck and did not feel a connection to him any longer. The hold he had was gone.

_____________________________

respectfully,
candisa

Freely we serve, because we freely love, as in our will
To love or not; in this we stand or fall.



(in reply to vinylchick42)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 10:27:49 AM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline 		In my heart of hearts, I felt "owned" well before Sir placed the collar around my neck.  It's physical, emotional and mental.....and might I add, spiritual too.  When He placed the collar around my neck, I knew the feeling was reciprocated.  Of course it generated all sorts of kisses and hugs and silly, lovey actions.  Now the collar is an outward sign of the actual commitment in my heart.....the only time it comes off is when I'm in the shower or when it's getting saddle soaped.    


_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to vinylchick42)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 10:33:01 AM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline 		i don't think there's a universal feeling. what one person assigns to ownership may be markedly different from another. i prefer to simplify things and pose this question to you instead. when you're in a relationship with a man, how do you know when he's serious? when this person really desires your company and wants to not only be with you but have you at his side. when all the what ifs disappear and you feel as if you're both on the same page and moving in a direction hand in hand. if you're able to define these checkpoints in a relationship and see similar elements in the one you're involved with now, that may provide the answer you're seeking. we all have experienced in some manner what it means to be wanted and kept, ownership is merely another spin on that theory.

porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to vinylchick42)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 10:38:02 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		I have to agree with the sentiments of the other posters.  Ownership lies more in the heart of the submissive than in the acts of the dominant.  If you are at that place where you simply cannot turn away, then it is done.

lovingpet

(in reply to sweetsub1957)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 4:12:15 PM   
brandi1379


Posts: 137
Joined: 3/3/2009
Status: offline 		To me in my heart i know i belong to him, and thats all i really need 

(in reply to lovingpet)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 4:41:48 PM   
jonetmack2000


Posts: 1
Joined: 7/1/2009
Status: offline 		hi

(in reply to Rainfire)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 5:02:28 PM   
xiam


Posts: 148
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline 		He knows by the way i look at him that i belong to him, and i know by the way he looks at me that i am owned.

It doesn't have to be taken so literally.  My pups wear collars.  If they were able to answer your question, they would say they were loved.  :)

(in reply to vinylchick42)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 5:24:47 PM   
Alanshoreisgod


Posts: 28
Joined: 6/30/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: vinylchick42

being fairly new to the wonderful world of BDSM i am curious as to what it means to be owned without the obvious physical collaring of someone.  does it mean i have been 'owned' if my mind swarms of thoughts of the Dom literly all day long?  or when i hear his ring tone on my phone and it causes an instant automatic rush of wetness in my panties? also making my heart race like a young girl on her first date. even after months of being with him, he still makes my palms sweat with giddy nervousness and excitement.

are these some feelings of being 'owned'?


These words like "owned", they're...well, if not "meaningless", they are, at best, an abstraction.  A general conception.  Nobody is going to feel exactly like you do.  Nobody is going to have exactly the relationship you have.  At best, these terms are nothing more than something that lets people with similar lifestyles to share similar experiences by slapping a label on a roughly common ground.

In the end, you are if you think you are. 

< Message edited by Alanshoreisgod -- 7/1/2009 5:28:20 PM >

(in reply to vinylchick42)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 5:32:06 PM   
playfulotter


Posts: 2195
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		I have been told by Him that I am "His" and no others and he has said to me that "He" is mine and no others..that is enough for me...We have many collars we use in play but for us a collar has no other significance...at least at this point in time. 


PS...being owned to me used to be what I wanted but now that doesn't matter just belonging with someone special does..so I will say i want to "Belong"....not necessarily be "owned"..but that puppy girl in me still wants to be owned...woof woof!

< Message edited by playfulotter -- 7/1/2009 5:36:26 PM >

(in reply to Alanshoreisgod)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 6:00:31 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline 		Certainly one can have very intense feelings and a sense of dedication, etc. but, imo, one is owned when the parties involved have had that conversation and decided that it is so. 
Best wishes,
  Davan

_____________________________

May you live as long as you wish & love as long as you live
-Robert A Heinlein

It's about the person & the bond,not the bondage
-Me

Waiting is

170NZ (Aka:Sex God Du Jour) pts

Jesus,I've ALWAYS been a deviant
-Leadership527,Jeff

(in reply to playfulotter)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/1/2009 6:27:28 PM   
mysticalfeather8


Posts: 3
Joined: 7/5/2008
Status: offline 		For me when i realised that Master had my heart, mind and spirit, then and only then did i truely know i was owned, by Him. i dont wear a collar that Master has put on me, but there is one there none the less. If you feel owned and the Master says you are then you most assuredly are own. Be proud of it!!
i am owned by Master Quiet Strength 4 u,   and proud of it!

(in reply to DavanKael)
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RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/2/2009 6:43:02 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline 		Who can tell? They sound like the same things that people *in lust or love* feel.

I felt like that about any man I was in lust with.....but I certainly wasn't *owned* by them. I feel similarly about my Owner of many years.

Those things, on their own, wouldn't spell *ownership* to me.

agirl

(in reply to vinylchick42)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/2/2009 7:21:28 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

someone told me long, long ago

the collar is worn within long before it is ever placed around your pretty neck.

the physical collar just removes all doubt

smiles


I take my hat off to you lass that is brilliantly said. I see the p0hysical collar as three things:
  1. To advertise that you are taken and owned, and hopefully to stop ijits from making a move on you.
  2. To have something to attach a leash, shirik or chain to.
  3. Classic sub/slave neck decoration.]
The real collar is within you and you will feel it every day and night. It also comes with an invisible leash so that just a look, silence or voice tone hauls you back to a state of absolute attention..


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/2/2009 8:35:33 AM   
sweetsub1957


Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

someone told me long, long ago

the collar is worn within long before it is ever placed around your pretty neck.

the physical collar just removes all doubt

smiles


I take my hat off to you lass that is brilliantly said. I see the p0hysical collar as three things:
  1. To advertise that you are taken and owned, and hopefully to stop ijits from making a move on you.
  2. To have something to attach a leash, shirik or chain to.
  3. Classic sub/slave neck decoration.]

The real collar is within you and you will feel it every day and night. It also comes with an invisible leash so that just a look, silence or voice tone hauls you back to a state of absolute attention..



IronBear, that's perfect!!

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to IronBear)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: feeling owned without a collar???? - 7/2/2009 9:24:06 AM   
maia09


Posts: 113
Joined: 6/10/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: vinylchick42

being fairly new to the wonderful world of BDSM i am curious as to what it means to be owned without the obvious physical collaring of someone.  does it mean i have been 'owned' if my mind swarms of thoughts of the Dom literly all day long?  or when i hear his ring tone on my phone and it causes an instant automatic rush of wetness in my panties? also making my heart race like a young girl on her first date. even after months of being with him, he still makes my palms sweat with giddy nervousness and excitement.

are these some feelings of being 'owned'?


Well my take on it is yes, you are owned alright, but i'm not sure if it's by your Dom or your own reactions to him. So what happens if the day comes and you don't feel giddy nervousness, excitement, sweaty palms and an automatic rush of wetness in your panties? Then what - are you then not owned? This kind of ties in a little with another thread about subs knowing or not what they're asking. Lust and excitement are oh so fun, but for me, ownership entails a great deal more. The physical collar is not the significant factor, nor do i believe the things you've mentioned. But then i have to say - being owned is probably just as much a personal perception as anything else.  Too often subs and slaves rush into a "ownership" relationship because of the feelings they have and what they get - not because they have a strong desire to give to the Dominant. It's a tricky thing.


_____________________________

She reaches up, not for the apple, but for what causes it to be there.

"I will always be the virgin-prositute, the perverse angel, the two-faced sinister and saintly woman." - Anais Nin

Owned by Chairman


(in reply to vinylchick42)
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