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How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 2:45:27 AM   
cuteeslaveboy


Posts: 2
Joined: 3/13/2009
Status: offline 		I have been searching for a dominant female for a while now and i havent had much luck. Maybe its because im young or too unexperienced ? I've tried writing a descent description of myself and what i want from this lifestyle and a couple of good clear photos but it hasnt seemed to help much. I know that male subs clearly out number dommes but could anyone give me some advice on how i can prove to a domme that im 100 % genuine and truly want to serve ?
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 3:00:46 AM   
FullfigRIMAAM1


Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
Status: offline 		Forget that she is dominant, and court the lady you are interested in...  If you do it right, you'll end up with a fem dominant.     
Stella didn't copyright this advice, but I felt I should give the credit where it is due.    M

_____________________________

The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands.-Robert M. Persig

Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence Erich Fromm

(in reply to cuteeslaveboy)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 5:58:13 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		I'd remove that bit "can express herself and her dominance without having to be extremely dangerous and unfair."

I understand what you're trying to say, but the word "unfair" is something I never want to hear. 


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to FullfigRIMAAM1)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 6:13:46 AM   
daddysliloneds


Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline 		honesty usually works.

(in reply to cuteeslaveboy)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 6:33:07 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		This comes up from time to time and I'm going to zone in on it.

First of all, you can't *prove* anything by words that you type up on a screen.  The words that you write up are no more or less legitimate than what anyone else writes.  You may be sincere in your intentions, but they are the same words used by those who aren't.  Frankly, I could write up a submissive profile that would probably be better than the one I have as Myself, because it would all be make believe, and fiction is easier to write than fact.

The only way you prove anything is to do it, not just talk about it.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to daddysliloneds)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 7:00:56 AM   
cuteeslaveboy


Posts: 2
Joined: 3/13/2009
Status: offline 		I agree LadyPact but its difficult to prove myself in any other way either then the internet because not some but all of my friends are vanilla :P I am aware that there are clubs and munches but i dont have the courage to attend them alone hehe. Hopefully i can meet some people here and make some friends who i can tag along with. Thanks for taking the time to reply to my post mwaah.

(in reply to cuteeslaveboy)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 7:33:08 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Anytime.  Just remember.  No guts, no glory.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to cuteeslaveboy)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 8:14:15 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuteeslaveboy
I am aware that there are clubs and munches but i dont have the courage to attend them alone hehe.

To meet dominant women, there are only two things you need to be able to do.

(1) Be a gentleman.
(2) Be unafraid of meeting people in real life.

People say, there must be more to it, I've been looking for months, and no one even writes me back.  But the harsh reality is that if you do those two things, you will have an advantage over 95% of the men on this site.

Look at it this way.  You're a woman.  You're looking for a partner.  A man writes you, and says, "I like the idea of flirting with women when I am behind a computer, but I am too afraid of women, and my own sexuality, to meet someone in real life."  Would you feel flattered?  Or would you think, "Oh no, another guy who is cruising for some free interactive computer porn."

If it helps, remember that courage is nothing more than acting as though you are not afraid.  You can be freaked on the inside, as long as you don't let it affect what you do on the outside.

< Message edited by RedMagic1 -- 7/4/2009 8:15:05 AM >

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to cuteeslaveboy)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/4/2009 8:24:18 AM   
penitentialarts


Posts: 43
Joined: 1/2/2009
Status: offline 		>I am aware that there are clubs and munches but i
>dont have the courage to attend them alone hehe.

You have to get over that. 

Everyone is nervous when they first start attending munches and such.  Just do it.

- Jesse

(in reply to RedMagic1)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/6/2009 2:38:25 AM   
FullfigRIMAAM1


Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
I'd remove that bit "can express herself and her dominance without having to be extremely dangerous and unfair."

I understand what you're trying to say, but the word "unfair" is something I never want to hear
I agree with you Steven...  Unfair is considered a four letter word when approaching or speaking with me.   I just think, there's going to be far too much explaining if you still haven't learned the world is unfair, and I at least give you fair warning.    M

< Message edited by FullfigRIMAAM1 -- 7/6/2009 2:39:00 AM >

_____________________________

The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands.-Robert M. Persig

Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence Erich Fromm

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/6/2009 3:33:32 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I, and I think possibly a lot of subs, get off on the 'unfairness' of D/s.  But it's got to be unfair in a fair way.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to FullfigRIMAAM1)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/6/2009 5:27:40 AM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline 		Oh Lord, not another midriff abs pic with a dorm room--oy oy oy--you won't stand out with those and you won't be taken as much more than a nightrider ( someone who gets online, whines to get attention and has not one serious intent when the sun comes up).
 
And at 19 you've been looking how long?  Entering BDSM and proclaiming yourself a submissive, is no different than walking into a stadium and proclaiming you are a fan--no one is going to fall at your feet, especially Dominas---I'd suggest coming in to the light of reality--interests, hobbies, honest talk about the things you are or may be interested in--WHAT YOU FEEL YOU BRING TO A DOMINANT--after all it isn't all about you now is it?
 
And don't whine--you have just started your search. If you are that desparate find a Pro.

_____________________________

I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to cuteeslaveboy)
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RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/6/2009 6:48:01 AM   
chiaThePet


Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline
These?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BDF04M3ALEs

chia* (the pet)




_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to cuteeslaveboy)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/6/2009 1:24:13 PM   
angeldmort


Posts: 54
Joined: 4/19/2009
Status: offline 		4:09 PM Now, see, I am on the other end of this. I have request after request that seem to be form letters. (Often from places too far away to be realistic, but that's a different problem.) "hi Mistress" "im male submisive looking for dominant woman to use me as male slave" "may I worship your feet?"
These men often have mostly empty profiles, respond to a reply with another form letter-like response, and as far as I can tell, the only thing they know about me is that I'm female and list myself as Dominant. Hmmm… so.. They can look at a picture and want my attention, but won't devote the extra 2 minutes to read my whole profile or even remember who they are writing in order to tailor the email to what they see in the picture.  
I can't say that I have enough experience in the lifestyle to promise what anyone else wants, but no one is going to stand out by sending spam. (Not saying that's what you're doing - just suggesting that you make sure your emails don't look generic enough to be spam.) Random, mass emailings are just a little insulting, in my opinion. Everyone wants to feel special, and if you can send that same email to 25 other people, then I won't feel special when I get it.   
If you want to stand out, be personal. Show that you're actually interested in the Domme herself, that you've made more than a minimal effort before you contact her. Be interested, and that is interesting.   

< Message edited by angeldmort -- 7/6/2009 1:26:04 PM >

(in reply to chiaThePet)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: How do i stand out from the crowd ? - 7/6/2009 11:36:34 PM   
FullfigRIMAAM1


Posts: 1160
Joined: 11/20/2008
Status: offline 		I don't know about unfair in a fair way Peon...   For all I know (to some boys), I am extremely fair; I certainly have been incompatible because of being so called "too nice."    I would say that I'm fairly unfair in relationships though.     M

_____________________________

The place to improve the world is first in one's own heart and head and hands.-Robert M. Persig

Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence Erich Fromm

(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 15
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