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Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 2:53:32 PM

destinywillbe

Posts: 4
Status: offline

i was in a profound relationship with someone and we are now over, it was a very painful separation because as many of you know these types of relationships are like no other and HE knew and controlled me the way no one ever has...i was addicted.

The separation anxiety and fear is over and i am fine.

However i do miss him terribly even though he threw me away....

Do i beg HIM to take me back or begin a fresh start?

If you had a slave that you treasured for years and you released her would you want her to beg or move on?

i do apoligize in advance if this is not approprite discussion.

Post #: 1

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 3:05:40 PM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

Move on.

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Post #: 2

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 3:11:35 PM

MsLadySue

Posts: 2254
Joined: 12/18/2004
Status: offline

I'm sorry things ended badly, but you should keep in mind ... an ex is an ex for a reason.
You say: The separation anxiety and fear is over and i am fine. Why would you want to go back to someone you say "threw me away"? Sounds to me like you are better off now. Your best bet is to find someone who will treat you as you deserve.

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Post #: 3

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 3:11:49 PM

thesis

Posts: 4
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline

Why are you torturing yourself..If yu are a good slave then move on and let another good Master take hs place. Obviously if he wanted you back and he realizd that he had made a mistake in releasing you, then he would have known and you would have been back i his fold. We do not know the specifics as to why, so as one would say there are two sides to to every fable. Maybe it is time you moved on..there are other good Masters out here who can appreciate and want a good slave. If it was me I would want you to move on because the lingering doubts will always be there for you and for me...

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 4

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 3:21:41 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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If it ended after 'years' it was something significant enough that it was sufficient reason to end the dynamic. Without knowing the particulars, that is enough to say My vote would be move on.

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Post #: 5

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 3:33:06 PM

DomDolf

Posts: 363
Joined: 7/11/2008
Status: offline

People do not change as much as we hope they would. Situations change all the time. You have to decide what is best for you keeping that in mind. Work with your brain here, not your heart. In general I believe you should use your experiences with this past relationship to making a future one last and be better than that one was. I can tell you that if one of my ex-submissives begged for me back that it would touch me, it would have my mind going for a while and I may even talk about it as if it were a possibility, but the reality is that it didn't work for a reason and the chances of that being different this time around would be slim. The anguish that would be caused by trying and failing would not be good for either of us. I would move on. Reluctantly probably, but I would do the right thing and move on.

Dolf

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 6

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 3:35:02 PM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline

Please move on. It ended for a reason and you say you've gotten over much of it- don't let that good work go to waste.
Yes, it's hard but worth it. There is someone in my past that I periodically want to go back to and when I take the time to think it through I know it would be a disaster just like it was before. He does have this hold over me but I'll keep trying to ignore it because honestly there were reasons it didn't work out before and they haven't changed.

(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 7

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 3:42:07 PM

nephandi

Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline

Greetings

I am sorry to hear about your break up it must have been painful.

Now I do not know anything about your situation, if there was some argument, some thing that you can talk about and fix perhaps giving the relationship another go would work. But barring that. Sometimes one part in a relationship looses interest in the other. If he let you go sweetie it was probably not so he could watch you beg to be taken back. Sometimes you just have to accept things the way it is, he left you, for some reason he did no longer wish to be with you, begging probably will not change that, and if it do, changes are it is guilt on his part, him wanting you to stop hurting so he take you back for a while but the relationship will then break down again.

My advice is that if there was no reason you can talk about and fix for the breakup, then probably you have drifted away from him and the best thing you can do for the both of you is to get one with your life and find another and remember the good times in your old relationship.

I wish you well

_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad

(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 8

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 4:09:24 PM

destinywillbe

Posts: 4
Status: offline

Thank you for your responses,
I know where is my self respect....i have none when it comes to HIM
i am happy and im sti;ll dealing with my daily life i even hosted a party well actually hosted one and attended anopther this weekend. i am keeping myself busy but. i miss my daddy so bad!
and I just know that there is not going to be anyone else that can control, me the way HE has, I think maybe i just wanted advice on whether i should contact HIM or not.
after reading this i think NOT...
Do DOMS ever call the bitches back after they have released them?
I am asking in all respect, as a woman in fear of never feeling him near me again.
Is it possible for a DOM to ever contact his slave again?
Or not?
because i know the kind of MAN HE is and if i dont beg i dont think HE will call...

i am not going to pursue any new MEN until its been atleast a month, maybe by then it will sink in that YES DADDYS GONE!

Live and let Die!

(in reply to lizi)

Post #: 9

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 4:17:17 PM

DomDolf

Posts: 363
Joined: 7/11/2008
Status: offline

Wow, I was thinking this had been a while. You are still in the fire with this. It is almost always that people worry they will "never feel that way with another". It is almost always that it is NOT true and they find someone that makes them even happier.

Yeah, new men now... BAD idea. Begging for him back... Again you have to decide based on your experiences in this.

How long were you with him?

(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 10

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 4:24:37 PM

destinywillbe

Posts: 4
Status: offline

2 years.

(in reply to DomDolf)

Post #: 11

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 4:46:03 PM

bamabbwsub

Posts: 566
Joined: 5/28/2007
Status: offline

destiny, I was in a relationship with a wonderful Dom for over 2 years. I loved him like I have never loved any other man. Since we broke up (I ended it with him), I have second-guessed my decision a number of times because I still miss him.

When I get in my melancholy mood, what I do is start thinking about the reasons we broke up. I re-live all of our arguments in my head, and eventually I get to the point where I wouldn't take him back if he were the last man on Earth. LOL So maybe you need to concentrate on what caused your relationship to end rather than how much you miss him. It sounds as though you're very lonely, and may be thinking that even a "bad" relationship is a relationship...but I'd advise you to be strong, especially since so little time has passed.

Best of luck!

< Message edited by bamabbwsub -- 7/6/2009 4:47:18 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 12

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 5:15:41 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

destiny, you say you'll give it a month before you contact any other men. Give it a month before you contact him as well.

You just broke up. Don't pester the guy. Wait, and then call him. Ask how he's doing. Make it clear that you want to stay in touch on a friendly basis.

If something more happens, it happens. But if he dismissed you, the chances are not good.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to bamabbwsub)

Post #: 13

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 5:33:36 PM

NihilusZero

Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

If you still feel any deference to him, why not passively asking him, in as yielding as tone as possible, if it is acceptable (and/or annoying) for you to beg for his approval back? Then, follow that up by ascertaining if he thinks that enough begging may mean he'll take you back. Determine (as clearly as possible) how much, how long and in what ways the begging would happen and determine if it's worth the investment.

< Message edited by NihilusZero -- 7/6/2009 5:34:09 PM >

_____________________________

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I know they're all insane
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(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 14

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 5:52:43 PM

nephandi

Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline

Greetings

quote:

and I just know that there is not going to be anyone else that can control, me the way HE has, I think maybe i just wanted advice on whether i should contact HIM or not.
after reading this i think NOT...

Stop right there, have a read at any post on any forum written by someone who have just had a break up, talk with people who have just had a break up, and you will hear, no one will ever love me the way he did, no one will ever hold me the way he did, and then a year down the line they are with a new person and while off course this new lover is not the same as the old, so nothing is the exact same way, often it is better.

quote:

Do DOMS ever call the bitches back after they have released them?
I am asking in all respect, as a woman in fear of never feeling him near me again.
Is it possible for a DOM to ever contact his slave again?
Or not?

Let oracle sub look into her chrystal ball, and then oracle sub will give you the definitive answer to Domness, wait for it...wait for it while oracle sub go into a trance to see what every Dom might or might not do...please stand by for oracle sub's answer:

Sorry for the flippant comment, but you where kind of open to it. There is no law that say how every Dom will act in every situation, do Doms ever get together again with their subs after a break up no matter who called it off, off course. But you are not asking about all Dom's are you, what do it matter what other Doms may or may not do, what matters is what this one man in your life might or might not do. And that my dear you can answer far better than any of us, as you actually know the man.

I wish you well

_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad

(in reply to NihilusZero)

Post #: 15

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 8:26:36 PM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

profound relationship

Ahh, another anonymous caller... just what I needed... is it a man? a woman? a Ford Edsel? a cat? one way traffic will never cease.

(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 16

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 9:01:12 PM

Joseff

Posts: 505
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: destinywillbe

If you had a slave that you treasured for years and you released her would you want her to beg or move on?

If I treasured something, I would not throw it away.

_____________________________

This is gonna hurt...

Joseff

(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 17

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 9:44:25 PM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
Status: offline

He threw you away like a used tampon. He does not "treasure" you- not anymore.

Move on.

Take some time for yourself, before you even think of dating again. Don't contact him for at least six months. More, if you're not over him by then.

ENJOY BEING SINGLE. Enjoy the chance to do what YOU want and need to do.

ENJOY YOUR FREEDOM!

Celebrate the miracle of you! Make your life a bold, big ADVENTURE!

So you got dumped. So he's not the guy for you. He's just not that into you.

Too bad, so sad- it's HIS LOSS!!! He threw wonderful, beautiful you out like the trash. Forget about him, he doesn't deserve you. Don't waste another thought on him. Make a list of all the things you want to to in your life, and start doing them. He doesn't deserve to be the one to accompany you in the big adventure that is your life. He's just not good enough for you.

Busy yourself having fun doing the things that you want to do, until one day soon you'll realize that you're just not that into him- you're into you.

_____________________________

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(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 18

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 10:04:49 PM

corsetgirl

Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

I am not too sure if you are over him because of this desire to go back to him. I used to feel the same way about an ex-dom who left me for another. However, I have learned to heal by taking time to be by myself. A lot of good advice from Dreamer. I was devastated when an ex dom left me for another but I realize now this relationship did not work because we were going in different directions. Once I knew why things did not work out, the "shouldas, wouldas, and couldas" went out the door. I also feel that karma has a way of affecting people in how they treat each other. Today, I can be relieved that by being released was the best thing that happened to me because I enjoy taking to time to know who I am and being strong.

It hurts to feel lost without a master but when you truly get over this emotion, then the freedom is a lot better than the drama. I wish you well and you have to make your own destiny to move on!

(in reply to dreamerdreaming)

Post #: 19

RE: Beggin to be taken back - 7/6/2009 10:19:54 PM

marie2

Posts: 1690
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Jersey
Status: offline

From what you've described, the situation sounds like it's far beyond the beg stage, for both of you.

(in reply to destinywillbe)

Post #: 20

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